The Sugarless Plum
by HotchnerJareau
Summary: Grace Victoria Hotchner is very much JJ and Hotch's little girl. Dancing with diabetes wasn't planned, and getting the Sugar Plum Fairy in her dance school's 'The Nutcracker' most certainly wasn't planned, either. With sugar being diabetes' number one enemy, it didn't make sense for her to be the Sugar Plum Fairy. And with that, she named herself The Sugarless Plum.
1. Chapter 1

**I have this universe that I like to write JJ and Hotch in because I can do so much with it. I sit for hours planning out what I'm going to write, and something about this family makes me enjoy it enough to produce pages after pages of these stories.**

**If you think them having 6 kids is silly, I'm going to show you that it isn't. Not every couple chooses to have 6 children, but some actually do. JJ and Hotch are a living example of that. They work long hours, have not one, but two children with type 1 diabetes, and on top of that, they have to manage raising 6 children all 11 and under.**

**These stories are not over-exaggerated, as I have done extensive research. So, the bottom line is, it might not sound realistic to you, but for someone who's going through this, or even understands what's happening, this will mean a lot.**

**Thank you to my wonderful friend, Courtney (andreearaducan) for planning my ideas out with me. I truly adore your talents and hope to one day produce work like you do.**

**Without further ado, here is my new story, The Sugarless Plum.**

* * *

The 5 year old's heart fluttered with pride as she exited the stage. Her legs shook with the last of her nervousness, and her face was flushed with worry.

"Grace! You did amazing!" Eleanor beamed, pulling her into a giant hug.

The girl shook her head and looked into her friend's hazel eyes, "no, I didn't, Ellie.. I did bad."

Eleanor frowned, fixing her earring. Grace was the best dancer in the class. She caught on easily, moved elegantly through the motions, and her turns were exquisite. She didn't understand why someone like her could ever feel so bad about themselves.

"You were amazing," the darker haired girl assured, "okay? Don't worry."

Grace nodded, playing with the end of her dress. She was very self conscious about her pump. None of the other dancers had devices to make insulin so they could live. Nobody else had to prick themselves with a needle to know how much blood sugar was inside of them. It made her feel so different. Even standing in the packed theatre, she'd never felt so alone.

She turned around when she felt a tap on her shoulder. Looking up, she realised it was her mom.

"Mommy! Did you see me dance?" She chirped, jumping into her arms.

JJ laughed and pressed a giant kiss to her forehead.

"You were absolutely incredible, baby!" She exclaimed, cuddling her little girl tightly.

Grace shook her head, those thoughts coming back.

"No, mommy, I wasn't good! I think I'm low," She frowned, scratching her head.

JJ put her daughter down and bent down to her level. She examined her red face and bit her lip in worry. This disease wasn't supposed to stop her daughter from doing what she loved, nor was it supposed to make her feel any less than she was.

"You were a little high before you went on, so you shouldn't be too low now," JJ said, shouldering her purse, "i'm going to check your pump. You shouldn't have gone down much."

Grace fiddled with the bottom of her dress as JJ checked the number on her pump that sat on the waistband of her light pink tights.

"4.4," JJ said to herself, pulling up her daughter's tights.

JJ lead Grace out of backstage and into the hallway. She let her daughter press the elevator button while she fiddled through her purse, trying to find her phone.

Grace looked up at her mother, "what is it, mommy?" She asked, studying her expression.

"Uh, nothing, Gracie," she put off, watching the doors ding open, "nothing for you to worry about."

JJ and Grace stepped into the elevator. Something was off, and Grace knew it. She was determined to figure it out.

"You did phenomenal tonight," the mother said, changing her tone, "I watched you and you were spectacular."

Grace smiled, staying close to her mother's side. She looked up to her mom more than anyone. They were so close to each other, and both felt like they could tell each other everything. Only, Grace was often confused as to why her mother couldn't tell her everything.

"Really?" Grace asked, looking up, "because I think I did bad, and everyone knows I have diabetes."

JJ felt her heart break a little more than it already had. Her child shouldn't still be feeling this way. Sure, there would be ups and downs, but her daughter was 5 years old. She shouldn't be worrying about what others thought of her.

"Grace Victoria Hotchner, listen to me," JJ said softly, as the elevator door opened, "you are my little girl, and no little girl of mine should feel that they're different in a bad way."

Grace sighed, holding her mom's hand as they walked through the hallway to their hotel room.

"Mommy," she whined, "nobody else has to prick their finger! Why do I have to?"

"Grace," JJ sighed, annoyedly, "we have been through this a thousand times, and I will tell you again. Having diabetes will not stop you from dancing and playing soccer and doing what you love. You and Henry can do just as much as Jack, Luke, Tyler, and Ben can, and you know that. Don't feel bad about yourself."

Once they reached their room, JJ opened the door. Instead of Grace running in excitedly, she practically dragged herself through the room and got into bed.

JJ put her purse down and threw her phone down onto the bed beside her.

"Can you get your kit out for me, please?" She asked, grabbing her toothbrush from the bathroom.

Grace jumped down from the bed and landed lightly on the floor. She walked over to her mother's purse and dug through it until she found her testing kit. She then brought it over to the bed and unzipped it.

JJ finished brushing her teeth and removed her makeup. She tied her hair into a messy bun and walked out into the main area. She pulled Hotch's soccer coaching sweatshirt out of her bag and threw it on.

"Right," she said, getting the lancing device ready, "I want you to tell me why exactly you've changed your mind on diabetes."

Grace swallowed thickly upon hearing the click of the needle pricking her skin. She looked down at her finger as JJ squeezed the blood out of it and onto the test strip to be submitted into the meter.

"Lily told me you fed me too much sugar when I was a baby, so I got diabetes," She said, flat out.

JJ's eyebrows raised as she wiped the blood off of her daughter's finger.

"Okay, is that it?"

Grace nodded, pulling her finger back.

"You developed type one diabetes shortly after you were born, Grace. When you were 7 weeks old, the doctors told us you had type one, and that morning, we watched them prick your foot for the first time, so they could test your blood sugar."

"My foot?" The girl asked.

JJ nodded, reading the meter, "your fingers were too small to use."

She got off of the bed and went to the fridge, trying to find something to give her daughter as a bedtime snack.

"But I'm not normal," Grace sighed, following JJ.

The older blonde measured the carbs on a juice pouch before handing it to the girl.

"You are normal. Everybody is different. I don't want you to feel like you matter any less, okay? You're a fighter, you know that? You were less than a year old, already taking needles like a pro. And for that, you are my special little girl."

Grace beamed, still not completely filled by what her mother had said. She turned around as JJ began to unzip her dress.

"Does Henry ever feel not normal?" She asked quietly, looking out to the dark sky.

JJ pulled the dress off of the girl and nodded, helping her take her tights off.

"Yeah, he does. He's the only boy on his soccer team that has diabetes, and he doesn't feel like he belongs there. But, you know what? They all play soccer, right?"

Grace nodded.

"So, it doesn't matter. And, who cares if they know? His body and your body don't produce insulin and theirs does. That is the only difference, and it shouldn't make you feel bad."

Once Grace's clothes were taken off, JJ handed her some pyjamas and let her put them on as she put the dress back into it's bag. She then took her child over to the window and let her look out to the city while she french braided her lovely long blonde locks.

"And we all dance, so it doesn't matter." She said.

JJ smiled, wrapping the light pink elastic around Grace's hair.

"Exactly. Don't let this stop you. Now, go brush your teeth."

The girl ran off to the bathroom, while JJ went to the bed to grab her phone. Reading the noifications, that sinking feeling in her stomach had returned.

She didn't know what to say. She stared at the 2 words on the screen.

'Missed Call'

It had been nearly 45 minutes since she received the notification at the elevator, and she still hadn't done anything.

She turned her phone off and slipped it under the pillow, just as Grace came out of the bathroom and turned off the light.

"Are you okay, mommy?" She asked innocently, climbing up onto the bed.

JJ nodded, cuddling the small child under the covers, "just a missed phone call."

Grace gasped, "from who?"

"It's just the doctors.. For mommy stuff. Don't worry."

The small blonde moved herself closer to JJ and closed her eyes shut.

"What about awards?" She asked, worriedly.

JJ pressed the child's head to her chest, "they had a mix up, so they're doing them in the morning. It's really late, and we have a big day tomorrow, so try and get some sleep, okay?"

"Okay," Grace whispered, burying herself in her mother's warmth.

JJ had waited for a while before even attempting to pick up the phone again. Her daughter had become more curious than ever, and was beginning to interrogate her mom.

* * *

After awards had finished, Grace's stress had certainly dropped. She bounced into the hotel room with JJ on her tail, carrying her 1st place trophy. The thing itself was nearly twice her height. Then again, the child had taken on her mother's short height trait. Either way, the trophy was certainly the biggest she'd gotten, and she was mighty proud.

"Finally," JJ sighed, placing the trophy in the corner of the room, "we get a trophy to put up amongst all the boys' awards."

Grace nodded, jumping onto the bed, "and it's my first competition!"

JJ laughed, agreeing with the young girl, "and there will be many more to come. Okay, over here. We gotta do a site change."

The small blonde groaned and dragged herself over to JJ. She'd done site changes pretty much all her life, except for the time she spent on shots after her time in a coma, but that didn't make it enjoyable.

She lifted Grace's shirt up over her shoulders, taking it off, and then put the pump in stop mode. She quickly disconnected the infusion site, and then capped off the infusion set. With 6 years of practice, she had this down to a science.

Once the pump had been disconnected, JJ used baby oil to loosen the head set from her child's belly. She disposed of the old set and prepared the new set.

"Okay, ready?" JJ asked, squeezing the fat on Grace's stomach. The girl nodded, and held her eyes tightly shut as she felt the set click into her body.

"Done?" The little girl asked, her eyes remaining shut.

JJ nodded and connected the tubes. She pulled on them to check for fitting, and then taped them in place with a thick pink strip of medical tape.

"Done."

* * *

JJ and Grace were flying out of Arizona and back to Washington. Their weekend had been extremely busy, resulting in Grace's blood sugar levels being all over the place.

Once they had gotten through security and onto the plane, they could relax. The poor child was so worried about her mother, she had began studying her facial expressions. JJ looked very on edge, biting her nails, tapping her foot. You named it, she was doing it.

They had been in the air no longer than half an hour, when Grace worked up the courage to open her mouth to her mom. She knew it might make her angry, but she couldn't help but be concerned. She wasn't usually like this, and it hurt to see her mother so on edge.

"Mommy?" Grace asked, shaking her mother's shoulder.

JJ took a deep breath and looked down at her daughter, turning off her phone.

"What's making you sad?" She asked.

"I'm not sad, plum, I'm nervous," JJ admitted, covering Grace with her indigo blanket, "but I don't want you to be worried."

The young girl wasn't going to be shrugged off again. She was determined to get an answer.

"What are you nervous about?" The small blonde inquired, "I won't tell anyone, I pinky promise," She added, sticking her pinky out in front of JJ and wiggling it.

Sighing, JJ knew that giving her child a satisfying answer would stop her from asking questions. She knew that by expelling a small amount of detail, she would realise that it wasn't anything big.

"Um," JJ said, "it's the doctors, and I went the other day to get some blood tests done, and they've called me back. I wasn't able to answer, so I have to call them when we get home."

Grace took in this information and giggled, "are you scared of a phone call?"

The older blonde shook her head, "no," she laughed to herself, "I'm scared of what the doctor is going to say. My blood tests came back."

The child gasped, grabbing JJ's hand, "do you have diabetes too?"

"No, no, plum, I don't.." JJ smiled, "it's a different type of blood test."

Grace frowned, "no fair. I want to do the same blood test as you!"

JJ shook her head and sighed deeply, "Grace," she said firmly, "mommies can be tested to see if we have something in our blood that the doctors use to see if we're pregnant or not. That's the test I got back. It's not the same as blood glucose."

The girl's face brightened, "are you having a baby?"

"That's what I have to call the doctor about. You can't tell anyone. Not your brothers. This is for us girls only," JJ said, sticking her pinky out.

Grace locked her pinky around her mother's and smiled. Maybe she wasn't just the only girl in a family of boys. She wasn't so invisible, after all.

JJ's eyes opened as she heard the faint sound of her alarm going off through her headphones. She checked her phone, realising that it was time to test her daughter. She woke the child up, and then grabbed her testing kit from the carry on bag above her.

Grace heard the familiar click of the needle pricking her skin, and then went ahead and squeezed the blood out of her finger.

"So, I might get a sister?"

"Grace," JJ said, "I don't even know if I'm having a baby. I don't want you getting excited just yet, okay?"

The girl frowned and sighed, "okay."

The older blonde finished cleaning her daughter's finger off, when the reading came back. Smiling, she put the meter away and had a Grace stand in front of her. She read her pump to make sure everything was okay, and then gave her a juice pouch to make the slight correction that was needed.

As Grace settled herself again, JJ took a look at her. She'd been through so much in the short 5 years she had been alive. She was numbers away from dying, but here she was, dancing her little heart out. The mother couldn't help but be proud. The child didn't have to feel like she was constantly in the back shadows of their family, being the only girl. She could feel important.

"Get some sleep, we'll be landing shortly," JJ said, caressing her girl's head as she cuddled closer to her mom.

"Love you," Grace mumbled against JJ's chest.

The blonde leaned on her daughter and kissed her forehead, "I love you, too."

* * *

**Review!**


	2. Chapter 2

**This chapter will serve sort of as a second opening. The next chapter will really pull you into the story, so these are basically the introductions.**

**I had an anon ask why JJ was "upset about being pregnant", and here's my answer: in this story, I've taken her PTSD from the show and heightened it and since there is anxiety within PTSD, I've started infusing that into her character. She suffers from anxiety, and the thought of being pregnant really frightens her, despite having 6 other children. Also, don't forget, whether the husband is on board or not, pregnant women are often afraid to tell them. So, yeah. That's why she appears upset. Thanks for the question! **

**Here's chapter 2.**

* * *

Backing out of the airport parking space, JJ looked into the mirror, back at her daughter, who was making herself comfortable in her booster seat.

"I bet it's weird not having your brothers sitting around, huh, Plum?"

Grace nodded, patting the empty seats beside her, where Jack and Luke usually sat. It was certainly different than having 5 little boys in the car with her, playing games, eating, and talking loudly.

"It's too quiet," the girl said, "I miss the boys."

JJ laughed, "I think that's the first time you've ever told me you miss them...what exactly do you miss?"

"Well," Grace said, "I miss the noise, and I miss all the hidden snacks, and leaning on Jack when I'm tired, and I miss playing eye spy with daddy, and having enough people for a soccer game, and-"

The woman laughed to herself, listening as her daughter went on.

"You know who you remind me of?" She asked.

"Who?"

"Myself," JJ answered, focusing on the road ahead, "I was a lot like you. I had a sister and a brother, and they were the most annoying people ever. But, when they were gone, I realised that I missed them."

Grace sat up, intrigued by what JJ had said.

"You had a sister?"

JJ mentally cursed herself for saying anything. She stopped talking about Ros with the kids just before the triplets were born. Jack and Henry knew, but that was because they had personally asked. It was one of the things that helped the older boy deal with his biological mother's death. Henry only knew after his grandmother told him. She was not prepared to tell this to her daughter.

"Yes," JJ swallowed, "had."

"Ooh," Grace gasped, "when can I see her?"

"No," the older blonde corrected, "had...Gracie, I had a sister, but she died."

JJ was trying to concentrate on the road, but the thought of having to explain suicide, and why she thinks Ros did it was horrifying.

"How?" The young child asked, watching JJ through the mirror.

The blonde gripped the wheel, knowing that she could do this. It wasn't like her PTSD. It was just a hard subject. That's all she ever viewed it as.

"My sister, Rosaline...Ros," she mumbled, "killed herself...Ros was very sick in her brain, and she couldn't get help."

"Why did she kill herself?" The little girl asked.

Of course, JJ knew it was out of innocence, but the question had been asked to her so many times. The first, by herself, the next, by her therapist, and then the next by support workers at grief counselling.

"We don't know. She was just not very well, and there wasn't anything we could do to help her."

"Okay," Grace said, moving back to the topic of her brothers.

JJ sighed quietly, "thank God."

Her daughter was very much her at heart- asking all the questions, but in this particular topic, it's best to just hit and run. Ask the question, and move along. Thankfully, that's what she did. JJ just didn't know when she'd be ready to tell the other kids.

* * *

"Are we nearly home?" A small voice came from the back of the car.

JJ looked in the mirror, back at the child and smiled at her sleepy face.

"Yeah, we are. We have about 20 minutes to go."

Grace sat up and looked out of the window, watching the houses and trees and cars as they passed by.

"It's dark," the girl said, "is it bedtime?"

JJ laughed, "no, Gracie, it's about 6 o'clock. Daddy called while you were asleep and said he was making dinner, so it'll be ready when you get back."

Grace rubbed her eyes and readjusted her blanket.

"What did daddy and the boys do?" She inquired.

"They went to a football game."

The small girl's eyes widened, "all 6 of them went out together? How did daddy get them all out of the door?"

JJ let out a loud laugh as she turned onto the next road, "um, how do you think we get out of the door everyday? It is possible, you know, to get 8 people ready for the day...I know from experience."

"But you have to get one ready, and then another, and then another, and then-"

"Okay," JJ laughed, "I get it...your lives are hectic. You have music, dance, soccer.. I get it, and daddy and I can get everyone ready quickly now."

"Can you also make a girl baby?"

The older blonde laughed again, stopping at a stop sign. She looked back at Grace and cleared her throat.

"We can't control what we have, alright? Besides, you, my little plum, are my special girl. And that's never going to change, okay?"

"Okay."

* * *

"There's my girl!" Hotch exclaimed, catching the 5 year old in his arms, "how was your competition?"

Grace smiled wide, "I GOT FIRST PLACE!"

JJ smiled proudly, closing the door. Beside her, stood their daughter's trophy.

"The thing is bigger than her, it's almost as tall as I am," she said, kicking her heels off, "but now we have something to put up with the boys' things, don't we?"

"Yeah!" Grace exclaimed, jumping down from her father's arms.

"Hey, Plum, the boys have just sat down to eat dinner...wanna go join them?"

Grace nodded and ran off into the kitchen.

Hotch pulled JJ into his arms and hugged her tightly.

"Everything okay? You look a bit...worried."

JJ pulled back from his hold and looked him in the eyes, "it's nothing...it's just the stress of dance, and Grace's diabetes-"

"Is something wrong?"

"She's insecure about it," she said, "but it's normal...I mean, she's at that age where, you know, kids become more social...and they start to realise how different they are from everyone. I guess this is her difference."

Hotch pressed a kiss to her forehead and stroked her blonde locks out of her face, "do you know how much I missed you? It felt so weird not having you in my arms the past few nights."

"Lucky for you," JJ bit her lip, "I am all yours."

"Good, 'cause we're having some fun." He smirked.

* * *

"O-okay. Thank you," JJ said, before hanging the phone up.

Hotch quietly closed the door and came up behind her.

"Hey," he whispered, "Luke is down."

JJ turned around and nodded, folding her arms, "I'll go in and kiss him."

"Can we talk.. When you come back?" Hotch asked, noticing JJ's worry. She nodded and smiled, walking out.

The children had each been invited over to their friends' houses for sleepovers. It worked out well, because only Luke was home, and he was quite content playing alone. Plus, he was sick, so it was best for him to get through the contagious portion of his illness first.

When JJ came back, Hotch was hesitant to ask her anything. He knew she didn't like to be pushed.

"I missed you...a lot," JJ whispered, linking her arms around his neck. He held her tightly at her waist and their foreheads touched.

They slowly moved to the bed, where he laid her down gently and rest on top of her. It didn't happen all at once, but it was a gradual sequence that was very much enjoyable to the couple.

* * *

Hotch stroked JJ's hair back and looked her in the eyes. His hand lingered over her bare chest as he placed another kiss on her lips.

"Babe," JJ started, wrapping her legs around his waist, "we have to stop."

The man stopped what he was doing and moved to the side.

"Is there something wrong?"

JJ shook her head and bit her lip in nervousness. She clasped onto his hand and squeezed it tight.

"Nothing's wrong, I'm pregnant."

Aaron Hotchner was a very polished and put together man, but here he was- speechless- over his wife's announcement.

"Pregnant?" He asked again, his eyebrows raising in disbelief.

JJ nodded, searching his eyes for looks of worry and dread.

"Is that a good thing? Are you not ready?" She asked quietly, looking off to the side of him.

Hotch licked his lips and let out the breath he'd been holding. He smiled and took another breath. He couldn't believe it.

"Three years," he whispered, disbelievingly, "three years.. I-"

"I don't know what to do," JJ mumbled, chewing on her lip.

Hotch's eyebrows furrowed as he began running the possibilities through his head.

"You're not thinking of abor...no, you're not.." He began, feeling his whole body tense up.

JJ shook her head with wide eyes and got up, "no, of course not," she said softly, reaching for her sweatshirt.

Upon pulling it over his wife's head, he went to say something- he wasn't quite sure what- but stopped.

"Then.. What is it?"

JJ gulped loudly, "I...I'm...please get my med-medication."

Hotch quickly hopped off of the bed and over to the dresser where JJ's bottle of Paxil sat.

Originally prescribed for her PTSD, the Paxil was working. Earlier in the year, she had developed an anxiety disorder- which linked from the PTSD, though the panic portion was more severe. Her doctor suggested she use Paxil to treat both. It wasn't supposed to be like this. She wasn't supposed to be on multiple medications in order to stay sane for her family.

"Panic attack?" He asked softly.

She nodded, "it's mild...don't...don't worry."

By then, her voice had completely changed. Her words were very stammered, very hard to say. This was her sign that a panic attack had set into place. She had attacks at least once to twice a week. Sometimes more, sometimes less, depending on how it went. She sometimes had panic attacks before going to work, or before attending a competition, or even attending one of the boys' music concerts. It was unstoppable. It was uncontrollable.

"JJ," he mumbled, pulling his wife in close, "stay with me."

She wrapped her legs around his waist as he pulled her in tightly. It was silent, the occasional cricket being heard from outside. His hand found her unshaped stomach and laid upon it.

"You two are gonna be fine," he said, "promise me."

"I promise," JJ whispered, settling in his embrace, "we're fine."

* * *

**Review &amp; ask questions!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Finally, we're getting into the story. This chapter will sort of open up the story and tie all the topics together. **

**I had a reader ask if JJ's "panic attacks will effect the baby", and the answer is: somewhat. JJ has medicine that she takes to help her panic attack symptoms, and since it's not safe for pregnancy (Paxil is the worst), she gets it changed over. The only really major problem that can sprout from panic attacks in pregnant women are physical and emotional stress on the fetus, and even then, it's usually mild. Thanks for the question! If you have any more questions, just ask!**

**Here's chapter 3.**

* * *

"Morning sickness doesn't start right away," JJ told herself as she looked into the mirror, "you know better than that."

The woman looked down at the bathroom counters. Beside the sink sat two toothbrushes and toothpaste, and to the left of them, was a damp towel. She could already feel the tiredness kicking in. Splashing her face with water had not once helped her wake up.

There came a knock at the door, and at once JJ's mind ran blank.

"JJ? You alright?" Came her husband's voice.

Sighing, JJ turned around and placed her hand on the knob, "yeah, just finishing up."

She quickly turned back and lifted her shirt. She wasn't nearly far enough along to see anything, but the thought of carrying another child was still horrifying.

"We'll be okay," She sighed, dropping the hem of her shirt down to her waist.

She turned the knob and walked out to the hallway where her husband was, testing their two children.

The woman shifted awkwardly around the counter, coming in from the back. Her daughter's waist-length golden hair sat on her back, plaited. She played with it, wondering if she'd ever have another daughter. These days, that thought had come a little too often.

"You okay?" Hotch asked, throwing the kids' sharps into an empty laundry detergent container.

JJ nodded, giving her usual sincere smile, "just a bit sick...you know..."

"What?" Henry asked, hopping off of the counter.

"Um," JJ said, "nothing. I think I have the stomach flu."

* * *

It was late at night, past the children's bedtimes, but it didn't matter. It was a weekend. On weekends, they could stay up as late as they wanted, just as long as they were quiet and not cranky the next day. The rule was quite efficient, and, if broken, the child wouldn't be allowed to stay up again.

JJ and Hotch were downstairs watching a movie, while the children were in the playroom. Luke had fallen asleep after story time, and was in his bedroom. Jack, Henry, Tyler, Benjamin, and Grace were sitting in the playroom on their beanbag chairs.

"Hey, you guys," Jack started, "has anyone noticed how weird mom and dad have been lately?"

Grace looked up and nodded. "Daddy was rubbing Mommy's back this morning," she said, "and mommy said that it was only going to get worse."

"What do you think is happening?" Henry asked, "I haven't seen anything."

"Course you haven't, Henry. They're being all secret and stuff," Tyler said.

Benjamin shook his head as he pulled up his socks, "Jack, search it up."

"Huh?"

"Grace rolled her eyes, grabbing the older boy's iPad from him, "he said, search it up."

Within a few seconds, she had a hit. She was going to figure out what exactly was going on with her parents.

"What did you type in?" Henry asked, leaning back in his chair.

"Uh," Grace said, reading the search inquiry, "dad massaging mom's back a lot."

"Seriously?" Jack shook his head, "you typed in that? What even came up?"

The girl's eyes widened as she read what came up. Her little 5 year old brain was processing so much, practically anything was possible for her.

"Can baby feel when I rub my tummy?" She read.

Henry's eyebrows furrowed as he got up and walked over to where the girl was seated. "Gimme that," he said, "I wanna see."

Upon reading the words, he bit his tongue.

"Not again," he mumbled.

"What? What is it?" Tyler asked.

"Henry," Jack pressed, "if Grace can't figure it out, then you can."

Henry swallowed thickly as he glanced back at the screen. Yes, he had a huge imagination, but he was keen on this being true. It wasn't just imagination this time.

"I think mom's having a baby."

* * *

It wasn't far from 6am when Hotch woke up to the sound of his wife absolutely heaving her guts out. She sounded horrible, much worse than her other sicknesses.

Knowing she was being her usual self, not asking for help, he crept out of bed and went into the bathroom to assist her.

He knelt down beside her and grabbed her wavy blonde hair from the back and held it. His other hand supported her back, rubbing up and down until he could feel her calming.

When she was done, she slumped against the wall, breathing heavily. Hotch had, at this point, wet a towel and placed it on her forehead. Her face was red and sweaty, and she looked dehydrated, to say the least.

"I don't know..." JJ said softly, "how much more...I can take."

"Did they tell you how far along you are?"

JJ nodded, running her hand over her barely visible stomach. From a distance, it looked like she hadn't been watching her figure, but soon it would become a huge belly.

"Tests say about 7 weeks," She made out, bringing herself up to the toilet bowl.

Hotch swallowed thickly, holding back his wife's hair again.

This was only the beginning.

* * *

"Whatcha doing?" Tyler inquired, hopping up onto one of the bar stools.

JJ looked up. Her hands were sitting on the counter, her frame half leaning against it. She was very evidently having a panic attack, but the children didn't know.

"Ty Bug, I need you to get my phone for me," JJ said through a hard breath, "now."

Looking confused, the small boy jumped off of his stool and went around the counter, where his mother was heavily breathing. Their eyes met, and the child could see that she was scared.. At least, she looked it.

"Get my phone," JJ said shakily.

Tyler didn't want to move. His mommy was in trouble. He grabbed onto her waist and held her, in an attempt to stop her from shaking.

"Tyler, please," JJ begged, "get my phone."

The short blond haired boy remained holding onto his mom.

"Jack!" He yelled, feeling the violent shake of his mother beside him, "Jack!"

"What is it?" He yelled angrily as he made his way downstairs.

Tyler gulped as he looked into JJ's tear filled eyes, "mommy looks sick."

The 11 year old stopped in his tracks when he realised what his younger brother was on about. He had seen this before. It was all too familiar.

"Jack, I need you to.. To call dad," JJ made out, coughing. Her breaths were become more fast and shallow.

"Count to ten with her, that's what dad does," Jack said, dialling his father's number, "she gets better after that."

Tyler breathed in slowly and grabbed JJ's hand.

"Mommy, count to ten with me," he said worriedly, "one...two...three..."

Jack reached Hotch and managed to remain calm.

"Dad, mom's having a panic attack," He said as calmly as he could.

"Four...five...six," Tyler continued, helping his mother slow her breathing down, "seven...eight-"

"We need to be gentle," Jack said, his voice quite obviously becoming more alert and panicked, "she needs her medicine."

"It's...it's.." JJ tried saying, as she continued to shake violently. Her tears were very minimal, and by now, it was short, shallow breaths, a rapidly beating heart, and a lump in her throat that wasn't leaving.

"Where is your medicine?" Jack asked slowly, handing his brother the phone.

JJ maintained a steady grip on the counter as she tried grounding herself, making her body come back to reality.

"It's on...it's on my dresser," She said, her breathing becoming more delayed and heavy.

"Go and get it!" Tyler said, beginning his counting again.

Luckily, there wasn't anything in JJ's environment that was relatively dangerous to her or the kids. Panic attacks can strike at any given time, and being in the kitchen is one of the worst places to have them.

The poor 5 year old counted to ten six times, equalling a minute. By then, Jack had rushed back into the kitchen with JJ's medication. He was close to losing it. The sight of his mother in this state was next to living a nightmare. The constant fear of finding her like this had all of a sudden come true.

"How many do you need?" Jack asked, nearly shaking, himself. He had successfully unscrewed the child-lock and shook the bottle until 1 pink oval pill tumbled out into his hand.

"Just that...one," JJ coughed out, using her free hand to reach for it. She practically threw it into her mouth as Jack went around the counter to help support her.

"Mommy's eaten her medicine," Tyler told his father through the phone, "what else do we do?"

"Dad told me once," Jack said, "to just rub her back."

"He'll be 5 minutes," Tyler said, hanging up the phone, placing it on the counter.

Shaking her head after staying silent for a few seconds, JJ took a deep breath and looked at her two young boys.

"Th-thank you," JJ said, opening her arms.

Jack and Tyler hugged JJ from either side, holding on tightly.

"Are you okay, mommy?" Tyler asked softly, looking up at her.

Smiling as she let the last panicked tear trail down her face, she whispered, "I am now."

* * *

Later on, when he was sure his parents wouldn't be around, Benjamin crept out of his bedroom and walked down the hall. Stopping at the bannister that overlooked the living room, he leaned over it. Sure enough, as predicted, his mother and father were cuddling on the sofa.

He tiptoed along the hallway and turned the corner. When he found his brother's room, he knocked on the door. Hoping he wasn't asleep, he bit his lip.

"Who is it?" Jack asked.

"It's Ben."

"What do you need?" he asked, swinging open the door.

"Just let me in," Ben whined, "I need to talk to you."

When Jack led him in and sat him down on the bed, the younger boy was relieved, but nervous. Was he really doing this?

"If this is about mom going to the doctors tomorrow-"

"It's not that," Benjamin sighed, "can you listen?"

Jack nodded and shifted his position, "I'm listening."

The younger boy shook his head a little and began picking his finger.

"Are you going to tell?"

"It depends what it's about."

Benjamin signed deeply and crossed his legs, "how do you stop people from being mean to you?"

Jack's eyebrows furrowed, "why? Are people being mean to you?"

The little boy nodded, looking into his brother's eyes. He pulled up his shirt sleeve, revealing 3 big, purple bruises.

"Little kids like you can't do that," Jack said, "can they?"

Benjamin shook his head, "I don't know."

"Did you tell the teacher?"

"No, 'cause they'll think I'm a baby."

Jack sighed, "Benny, look at me. You are a strong boy, and I know that if you tell a teacher, they can help. I know it doesn't sound like the right thing to do, but it is."

Ben scoffed, "how would you know?"

"Because I got bullied too," he said, putting on a brave face, "and dad thought I was being picked on, and I never told him 'cause I thought I was brave enough to solve the problem on my own.. But I wasn't. When I told my teacher, she sorted it out. And now, we're friends."

"No way," Ben frowned, "I am NOT being friends with them!"

"It's an example," Jack said, "not what's going to happen to you. All I want you to do is go to your teacher when everybody goes outside and tell her what's happening."

The younger boy looked up at his older brother. He bit his lip in thought as he judged his options.

"Can you come with me?"

"Course I will."

"Promise me?" Ben asked, putting his pinky out.

Jack hooked pinkies with the younger child, "I promise."

* * *

**Review!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Here's chapter 4! Make sure to ask questions and review! I look forward to going through them! **

* * *

The fresh smell of medicine lingered in JJ's nose as she took a deep breath.

"You alright? You look nervous," Hotch laughed, placing his hand on his wife's leg.

It was JJ's 8 week checkup, and she was very nervous. She just wanted the doctor to find a steady heartbeat, nothing wrong, and then answer any questions she had. It was supposed to go smoothly. She'd envisioned this appointment since she booked it. Everything was supposed to go accordingly.

"No...just...this has to go the way I planned," she laughed, "and it's not going to go the way I planned, but-"

The door opened, and in walked JJ's OB. The woman felt her muscles tighten as the thought of complications arose in her mind.

"Jennifer, Aaron," she greeted, placing her clipboard down, "great to see you again."

JJ smiled and tightened her hold on Hotch's hand.

"How's the family been?" She asked, seating herself in the leather green chair across from the couple.

"They don't know what's going on yet.. We've been trying to keep this a secret until we're sure there's a child in there," Hotch answered.

Kayla, JJ's OB, snapped on her gloves and moved closer to the monitor.

"Your HGC levels were quite high on your blood test, so there is definitely something in there. Today, we're just going to check to make sure there is a heartbeat...that everything is developing nicely."

JJ nodded and winced as the cold gel was placed onto her just visible stomach. The familiar feeling of the wand as it glided across her belly made her butterflies act violently. She was one step closer to seeing her little baby.

"You're not new to this," Kayla said, directing JJ's attention to the screen, "you know what's what."

The woman laughed, trying to distinguish the baby inside of the sac on the monitor.

"Aha," Kayla smiled, moving the wand around JJ's belly, "that's why your HGC levels were through the roof."

Hotch looked at JJ with furrowed eyebrows, and together, they looked at the OB with worried and confused eyes. Could this be JJ's nightmare coming true?

"Is the baby okay?" Hotch asked.

"Everything is fine, actually," Kayla grinned, "you have two babies in there."

JJ practically choked when she heard the one word in Kayla's statement.

"Twins?!" She spluttered, her figure nearly shooting up off of the chair.

Kayla nodded her head, "identical twins at that."

Hotch was fixed in his position, swallowing thickly. Two more. It was going to take a very long time to get used to this.

"You sure it's twins?" He cleared his throat.

The OB turned the screen a few degrees so that both parents could get a clearer view of JJ's womb. He saw the sac, and then he saw two white figures beside each other.

"This is very clearly twins, Aaron," Kayla laughed, putting the wand away, "they will most likely be identical, as well. As you can see, they share only one sac."

JJ bit the insides of her mouth, definitely nervous and anxious.

"We'll still be able to swab after birth for clarification of whether or not they're identical, right?"

"Of course we can," Kayla nodded, cleaning the gel off of JJ's stomach, "your triplets were fraternal, right?"

Hotch nodded, "yeah, and so was our set of twins we had after them."

"As you know, fraternal sets run through families, whereas identical sets are spontaneous. Your records show that all are natural. That is impressive, considering most multiples are conceived through IVF and other treatments."

JJ grinned, holding Hotch's hand, "we just let this happen," she said.

"How do you think your other 6 will react?" Kayla asked, throwing her gloves into the medical glove bin.

"Uh," JJ began, looking at her husband, "I don't know."

"I know Grace wants a sister", the man said, "but, she knows the probability of us having girls."

Kayla smiled, filling out JJ's papers, "and she's the only girl?"

Jennifer's happiness flickered through her eyes, and she was sure the whole room saw it. She nodded, picturing the little girl in her mind.

"Yes," JJ said.

"Tell her she's lucky. Most girls would kill to have one on one time with their mother. No competition, no sharing clothes, and certainly no stealing boyfriends."

Hotch laughed, "I'm sure our boys have a standard for the boys that come into Grace's life."

"Tyler's keen on beating up whoever breaks Grace's heart," JJ smiled, "so, she is definitely the queen of the castle. She's got her knights in shining armour always by her side."

Kayla finished JJ's papers and put them into an envelope.

"Have you got any questions or concerns?"

Jennifer let her worries rush through her head.

"Two of our children have type 1 diabetes," Hotch began, "is there a chance of the twins developing it?"

Noting the look on JJ's face, Kayla slightly nodded.

"It isn't uncommon to see identical twins develop type 1. They are at increased risk for it. Diabetes doesn't run in your family, does it?"

JJ shook her head.

"So," Kayla said softly, "if one identical twin develops type 1, the other will be put at a 35% development rate. Having a sibling with type 1 puts another 5% onto that. I would say the other is at a 40-45% risk rate."

JJ shifted her position on the bed and grabbed her purse. Taking out her medicine, she said, "as you know, after Luke and Isabel were born, I developed anxiety and I experience panic attacks multiple times a week. I'm currently taking Paxil, but it's not..safe, is it?"

"Generally, no," Kayla began, "but I can get you a prescription for Elavil sent sometime in the week. You'll be able to go back onto Paxil after your pregnancy, but not while breastfeeding."

"Course," JJ nodded.

"Your next appointment is in 3 weeks. Today we got two strong heartbeats, so the next scan is just going to make sure they're still going strong."

"Thank you."

* * *

"We're back!" Hotch announced, dropping the car keys into the bowl that sat on the table in the foyer.

"Daddy!" Benjamin exclaimed, running into his legs. His arms made a big loop around his father as he hugged him tightly.

Hotch picked him up and threw him on to the living room sofa, making him laugh hysterically.

Tyler and Grace came running out of the playroom. A few seconds later, Reid came out on their tails.

"Hey, Spence, we're back," JJ laughed, taking her coat off and hanging it up in the closet.

The man smiled as he came and hugged JJ. "How'd it go?"

"Twins," Hotch grinned.

"You guys!" He exclaimed, "I'll go and let you tell them."

JJ smiled sincerely, "thanks, Spence."

* * *

"We knew it!" Henry shouted, looking at his siblings.

Hotch's eyebrows raised, "you knew what?"

"That mommy was having a baby."

"Only because we searched it up!" Tyler said.

Jack groaned, "Tyler! You're such a tell tale!"

"Guys, stop fighting. I am having two babies. I don't care how you figured it out, but now you know for sure. No fighting. Are we clear?"

The children nodded.

"Do you have a baby bump?" Grace wondered, excitedly.

JJ smiled, "it's not big yet, but yes, I do."

"What are you naming them?" Ben asked.

"We haven't figured that out yet," Hotch said, "but we know you'll be there when we do. We still have a long way to go."

Jack pictured two little babies crawling around the room. He'd been there when Henry was born, and he remembered how happy his mom looked. She was so happy to be holding Henry in her arms. Seeing her so stressed and having panic attacks was heartbreaking. He couldn't picture a sad JJ holding twins... Could he?

"Do you know what gender they'll be?" He asked.

Hotch shook his head, "no, but we'll find out later. Right now, mommy is 8 weeks pregnant. We will go back in 3 weeks when she is 11 weeks along, and we'll get the day the babies are supposed to be born."

"Wow! I want a baby! I wanna be like mommy!" Grace exclaimed, clearly in awe.

JJ gave wide eyes to her husband as she laughed, "Plum, you'll have to wait until you're older...a lot older."

* * *

JJ would've been sitting in complete silence if it weren't for the soft sound of her 5 year old walking into the room.

She looked up from her 'What to Expect When You're Expecting' book that she'd had since she was pregnant with Henry. When she saw her son, Tyler, she put the book down and looked at him with concern.

"Hey.. It's almost midnight. What are you doing up still?"

"Mommy," the boy said, "can I talk to you?"

JJ nodded and pulled the boy up onto her lap. She licked her lips as she positioned him so that he wouldn't lean on her stomach.

"What.. What do you want to talk about? Is there a problem?"

The boy shook his head, "no, I just want to ask stuff about the babies."

"What do you wanna know?"

"Will you still love me even if I'm not a baby?" He asked.

JJ frowned, pushing Tyler's bangs back, "of course I will. What makes you think I won't?"

"You're gonna be with the babies all the time, and you're not gonna have any time for us."

She knew it was true, but she also knew it was normal for children to feel this way. When Luke and Isabel were born, the triplets were only 2. They didn't have a clear understanding of attention. Now that they're 5, they know how much time they need with their parents.

"I have time for every single one of you. Jack and Henry felt this way when you, Ben, and Grace were born. But they play with you, and they love you."

"Why did they feel that way? You didn't have lots of kids."

JJ chucked to herself, "oh, Ty Bug. They were so used to us being a family of 4.. And, when we found out we were having triplets, we realised that life was going to change really fast. We had to take care of you three, plus, we had them two to take care of."

"Did they feel left out?"

The woman nodded, "they did, until they realised that you guys were their new playmates...and soon, we had 5 little children running around the house. You all played together. Jack and Henry loved playing with your toys, too."

Tyler smiled, "so, you won't forget about me?"

JJ pulled her son in and kissed him tightly, "course, I will never forget about you. Come on, let's go to bed."

With that, JJ took Tyler by the hand and led him off to his and Ben's bedroom. It was going to be a rocky road ahead, but she knew it would all be worth it.

* * *

**Review and ask questions! Thanks for reading!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Here's chapter 5! Be sure to ask questions and review! It means a lot to me that you would take the time to do that! **

**I had somebody ask about the children. It might be hard to follow the family sometimes, so I'll give you a quick run down. They have 10 children altogether. Out of those 10, 6 of them are physically here, 2 of them are inside JJ's womb, and 2 of them are deceased. **

**The 6 children who are alive are Jack, Henry, Tyler, Benjamin, Grace, and Luke. The Afghanistan miscarriage that JJ had on the show was their 3rd child. Her name would've been Charlotte. After they had the triplets later in the year, they had twins, Luke and Isabel. However, the twins were born at 20 weeks, and nobody even suspected it was twins. (This stuff actually happens, and in this case, Luke had squished Isabel so she wasn't seen well on the scans). Since being born so early, of course they had to stay in the NICU. Isabel was squished and couldn't grow properly, and that meant her lungs couldn't develop properly while her brother's did. Isabel died at 4 days old after her body could no longer take everything.**

**Now, JJ is pregnant with twins. I know what you're all thinking (Gosh, will she ever just have 1?) and I can safely say that this is reasonable. JJ would be 37 in this story. As women get older, their body becomes more able to release more than one egg at a time. Higher levels of Follicle Stimulating Hormone are found in women over 35. This means as their fertility rates decrease, their chances of having multiples increases. The rate for multiples can increase even more. If the mother has had other pregnancies, the chance goes up. Even more so, if she's had other multiple pregnancies, the odds are increased again. So, there you have it. Not unreasonable once you've done research! **

**So, to wrap this intro up, here I go. They have 10 children altogether, 6 alive, 2 in womb, 2 deceased. When JJ has these twins, they'll have 8 alive, 2 deceased. Everyone got it? Good! Thanks for asking that, by the way!**

* * *

Hotch and JJ were very much that one family whose kids seemed to be up all the time. Whether it was 4pm or 4am, these children were up and on their feet. They'd never had any complaints, simply because everyone in that neighbourhood had large families. They understood. That factor was just about the only thing keeping JJ from going completely insane.

To nobody's surprise, every single one of them was up at 4am. What really helped was that everybody knew what jobs JJ and Hotch had. There were always understanding people ready to help out, and as much as JJ said she didn't need the help, she really did. She had to learn that with the triplets. Going from 2 to 5 children was a hell of a jump, but the Jareau-Hotchner clan did it amazingly. When the triplets came around, she thought she could handle it.. Until those days where one child would cry, and the rest would feel like they had to chime in...yeah, those days. That was enough to get JJ on the phone to just about every person she knew.

"I want every single one of you to be on your best behaviour for Miss Kate. No fighting, no screaming, no back talk. You know the drill," JJ said.

"And," Hotch began, "on Sunday night, if we're not back, we will Skype you, alright?"

Grace folded her arms, "it's gotta be before we go to bed."

"I promise, it will be," JJ assured.

Hotch and JJ got their coats on before opening the door for their next door neighbour, Kate. The kids each greeted her, then hugged and kissed their parents goodbye. It was going to be a long weekend.

* * *

"I swear to God," JJ said through gritted teeth, "if I am sick even once on this case, I am going to shoot all of you."

Hotch chuckled, rubbing her back as they made their way through the bullpen, "relax, Jayje, you'll be fine. And if you're sick, they'll know why. Morning sickness isn't supposed to be kept a secret."

"Not if it's all day! I got about 3 hours of sleep last night, and I am not ready to continue that. I'm sleeping on the plane."

"Uh," Hotch began, "you can try."

JJ sighed, "you know, you're right...it's just, I'm not quite ready for twins. I know we have 6 already, and we've been through triplets, but...that was nearly 6 years ago. Sleep is becoming a luxury we no longer have."

"The team knows that, if that's what you're trying to say. Look, I know how busy our lives are, and I know how much busier they're going to get. Right now, we need to take it step by step, and I think, if we do that, we'll get through it."

Walking into the round table room, both parents smiled. They were about to reveal some big news. This was life changing, regardless of how many times they'd made this announcement. Each time it was different.

"Well, hello happy couple," Morgan smiled.

"I may as well just...cut to the chase," JJ began, as she put her bag down in her chair. "I'm pregnant."

Garcia's jaw dropped- and so did the remote.

"JJ! You mean there's a little baby human inside of you!?" She exclaimed, hugging the woman.

JJ laughed and nodded, "two...little baby humans inside of me."

Garcia looked as though she were about to faint.

"Congratulations," Rossi smiled, "to both of you."

Hotch smiled proudly and took his seat.

The older man turned to Hotch and struck an eyebrow, "that congratulations was for you, too, Aaron."

Hotch chuckled, "I'm aware of that."

* * *

Leaning her head on the side of the jet, JJ let out a deep breath.

"Panic attack?" Hotch wondered, his eyes widening. JJ having a panic attack on the jet was certainly not in their plans. The confined space, the altitude, and the amount of people there would equal trouble.

Shaking her head, JJ swallowed, "Nauseous."

"Do you need to be sick?" Hotch pressed, lightly stroking her hand as it laid across the table.

Again, JJ shook her head, "no.. No, I'm at work. I didn't take a sick day, I can do it."

"JJ," Hotch sighed, "for God's sake, you're pregnant with two children. If you need to take a sick day, every single person here will understand."

The blonde swallowed thickly, "I'm not using my pregnancy as an excuse, if that's what you're suggesting."

"Right," Hotch shrugged, "but you being pregnant means you're carrying two children around. Pretty soon, you'll have an aching back, swollen feet, hurting breasts...and you can't come into work. You can use pregnancy as an excuse."

JJ sighed, pulling her indigo blanket up, past her shoulders, "you're right, but...for right now, I can come into work."

"You have to promise me that the moment you can't get out of bed without hurting, you'll go on maternity leave."

The woman nodded, "fine," she mumbled, "I promise."

* * *

The sun was in the sky, revealing the late spring morning. The children had gone back to bed after their parents left, and were now up at 11am. Kate had known the family since JJ had Henry. She was sort of like that aunt that was always there. The kids were so close to her, and having her around was a play date for the kids in itself.

"Ben, can you tell everyone else that breakfast's ready?" Kate asked, pouring orange juice for each child and setting it onto the wooden counters. He ran off and began yelling for everyone to come downstairs.

Kate had already been with JJ and Hotch's 3 year old, Luke. He had become distant from his siblings and clingy with his parents since before JJ fell pregnant with the twins. Initially, Jack thought it was because he was jealous of the fact that he would no longer be the baby of the family, but it seemed to be something a lot different. Hotch suggested he be taken to a doctor, while JJ thought to wait a while. At this point, they were clueless as to what was going on with him.

Henry came bouncing into the kitchen with both Tyler and Grace on his tail. Of course, all three were shouting.

"Whoa, you guys need to slow down. You're gonna slip and fall right on your bottoms!" She laughed, helping Luke up to his seat.

Grace, Jack, Ben, Henry, Tyler, Luke, and Kate were now all seated around the breakfast nook. For breakfast, Kate had managed to serve up her best pancakes with sliced watermelon on the side. She'd done it so perfectly. Both Henry and Grace's dishes had been weighed for carbs, adjusted, and served. The children had also both been tested. It seemed like such an easy morning at first, but soon Kate realised how difficult it could be, doing it every day.

"Mommy can't cook," Grace began, "so thank you for these."

Tyler, Henry, Jack, and Benjamin began laughing almost hysterically. They were very much aware of their mother's cooking. It had it's ups and downs, but it meant that they could look forward to their dad's cooking a little more. Mom was still the best at shopping and cleaning. They had their ways.

Laughing, Kate said, "well, you just be glad I'm here for a while. Your dad tells me that he doesn't always make pancakes."

"Nope!" Tyler exclaimed.

"Oh, I forgot to tell you," Kate informed, sipping her orange juice, "your mom called a little while ago and said that they would both Skype you tonight as well as tomorrow, okay?"

"Yay!" The children cheered. They really did look happy. They were used to their parents going away for a few days at a time, but JJ and Hotch hadn't gone to work together in a long time.

She looked over and noticed Benjamin picking at his fingers. The other children were excited to call their parents, but he didn't seem so. Kate didn't want to cause any inconvenience, so she decided not to say anything. She knew she would ask him later.

* * *

Looking at the time on the bottom right of her laptop, JJ smiled. She was about to see her children's faces. It was 6:55pm in Arizona, which meant it was 8:55pm in Washington, D.C.

Hotch jumped onto one of the beds in the hotel room and began pulling JJ's hair back off of her face. He took her hairbrush from the night stand and began brushing his wife's waist-length hair. It was such a therapy to her. JJ's therapist had recommended he do it when she felt anxious. This therapy had calmed her down so much, and it drew JJ and Hotch closer together each time.

"Well hello you gorgeous bunch," JJ smiled into the camera.

Her little children were all sitting on the big beige sectional in the formal living room, squirming around and jumping on top of each other. It looked like home.

"How was your day? You all look tired."

Their loudest, Tyler, exclaimed, "okay, first, we woke up. And then we had pancakes, and then we went to the park, and then we made cookies, and then we watched Cars, and then we had a bath, and now we're talking to you."

"Aw," JJ sighed, "I wish there weren't a screen between us. We miss you."

Hotch began to french braid JJ's hair.

"Are there any cookies left? How are Henry and Grace?" He wondered.

"We're good," Henry and Grace said in unison. Both children then looked at each other and began laughing. This was a common occurrence between the two, but it mostly happened when asked about how they were. It happened way too often with their illness. This was just one of the perks.

"No cookies left!" Jack announced, "they're for kids only!"

Hotch laughed at his son. He loved watching him have a good time. It hurt that some of the good times he saw were through a screen, but he was grateful to have a job that was so rewarding in that way. Coming home and seeing your children running to you, exclaiming, "Daddy! Mommy!" was one of life's greatest pleasures on its own.

"We miss you," JJ said, tearing up.

"We miss you, too, but we have to go to sleep now," Benjamin informed.

Hotch and JJ looked at the time and realised they'd been blessed with a few minutes, and unfortunately, those few minutes were up. JJ was very keen on getting them to sleep on time. She hated having a bunch of grumpy kids the next day.

"Love you," JJ said softly, watching as Kate held a sleeping Luke in her arms.

Hotch tied off JJ's braid and threw his arms around her neck as she sat in front of the laptop on the bed. The hotel room offered a lot of space, and with the team down the hall, they felt somewhat comfortable. They just really needed their children. Sometimes going back to work and making small adjustments to everyday life isn't as easy as you think. JJ and Hotch quickly learned that.

"Love you!" The children said, waving into the camera. They began to blow kisses and giggle like they'd just been tickled. The children reminded them that they were never alone, that there was still innocence in their lives.

"Don't forget to test!" JJ reminded, watching as their connection cut off.

Soon the screen went black. JJ closed the laptop and put it on the chest of drawers. She climbed back into the bed beside her husband and snuggled in tightly with him.

"Thank you for doing my hair," JJ laughed, "it's lovely."

"You just be glad I know how to braid," Hotch admitted, "and I don't care if I have to braid your hair, Jayje. It's beautiful. You don't need a mirror to see that."

She smiled and rested her head in his arms and her left hand on his chest.

"I'm starting to lose all my energy," JJ softly admitted, "these two are wearing the life out of me."

Hotch reached his arm out to turn the lights off, leaving them in the dark room with the moonlight shining in.

"How uncomfortable are you really, Jen? I need a straight up answer," He said quietly, stroking her bare shoulder.

JJ swallowed thickly, "it's just.. It's uncomfortable. Being pregnant is uncomfortable. The sickness, the constant aching, the weight gain, the food, the...the everything! It drives me crazy, Aaron."

"The sickness hasn't seemed to wind down yet," Hotch said, "and I've seen how much you're aching."

"I'm going to look like a whale," JJ groaned, letting a tear fall, "and look at my hormones acting up! I can't do this, I'm a wreck!"

"Oh, God, JJ," Hotch laughed, kissing her on top of her head, "who cares what you look like? Your body is in the process of making two humans. Two little babies that will grow up to be as big and tall as we are. Right now, how many hearts are beating in this room?"

JJ sniffled, "4."

Hotch pulled the covers up over them, smiling, "and one of them is yours, one of them is mine, and two of them are inside of you. They're ours. You're doing all this work to bring those babies into the world. I don't think women get enough credit for that, you know?"

Smiling, JJ closed her eyes, "I love you. I really, really do, Batman."

"I love you more, Robin, and all of our little superheroes."

* * *

**Please review and ask questions! I appreciate it!**


	6. Chapter 6

**Here is chapter 6! Ask questions and review! I LOVE reading what you have to say!**

**Before I begin, I got 2 questions. The first is about Will. Here's the answer: in the story, he's dead because he died on a case. JJ was basically inconsolable and Hotch was the guy who helped her heal. I don't believe in making someone the bad guy. I love Will, and I wasn't set on him walking out on JJ and Henry. It's just not in his character. So, for the purpose of this story, he is dead.**

**The second question I got was about the kids' ages. I'm so sorry for not writing them before! In chapter 6, the time of the year is around July. For referential reasons, I've got the kids birthdays down as it helps me when calculating their ages. Here are the kids birthdays and birth order in the story (yes, the triplets have a defined birth order, and yes, the year is 2016):**

**Jack- November 7, 2005 (age 11)**

**Henry- October 28, 2008 (age 8)**

**Charlotte (miscarriage, 2011)**

**Tyler- November 24, 2011 (age 5)**

**Benjamin- November 24, 2011 (age 5)**

**Grace- November 24, 2011 (age 5)**

**Lucas- January 1, 2013 (age 3)**

**Isabel- January 1, 2013 (died at 4 days old due to lung failure)**

**Twins (born November 2016 sometime)**

**Anyway, here we go to chapter 6! Enjoy!**

* * *

The next few weeks served as a series of puzzles. Kate had mentioned to JJ and Hotch that Benjamin had been acting distant towards the other children. At first, it was shrugged off with an easy "he's just anxious about the babies," and after that, it was left alone.

It was nighttime, and the children were watching TV, while JJ was in the office, and Hotch was putting Luke to bed.

Her eyes were fixated on the pages after pages of research regarding diabetes in infants. She simply could not stop herself from this. It was a part of being pregnant. She was horribly worried about something happening to one or both of the babies, and the possibility of diabetes was high.

"It's 9pm," she heard from behind her.

JJ felt her heart skip a beat. She checked the time at the bottom right of the screen and spun around in her chair, swallowing thickly.

"Yeah...yeah, just...finishing," she said, getting up.

Hotch walked over to her and stopped her. He pushed her hair back off of her face and his eyes managed to lock a gaze on hers.

"Are you still researching diabetes? Come on JJ-"

JJ sighed. "I don't want anything to be wrong," she said, frowning.

Hotch pursed his lips, wondering what on earth JJ did to deserve all this stress. It made him so upset, knowing he couldn't help his wife all the time. He felt so helpless and he started feeling like he didn't deserve JJ in his life. Though he knew he was just being delusional, it was a thought that came all too often.

The blonde searched her husband's face. It was blank. He showed no emotion.

"You know...I get it," JJ said softly, "am I...too messed up?"

"JJ, it's not that at all. Why would you even think of something like that?"

The woman bit her lip as tears began to prick her eyes. "I want them to be healthy," she said, "I need them to be healthy...am I going over the top?"

"You're anxious, like all mothers are...but that's okay...I just don't want you sitting here for hours on end researching diabetes. It's a 1 in 300 chance...and I know you know that."

Jennifer swallowed and wiped the few tears that had managed to escape her eyes. "Come on...lets get these kids into bed. It's late...and they have school tomorrow," she brushed by him, "I'm sorry."

Hotch was left at the door with his mouth wide open, wondering how he was going to help her. This wasn't the way it was supposed to be.

* * *

"Are you and mommy going to the doctors tomorrow? Grace asked, feeling the needle as it pricked her left index finger.

Hotch nodded, preparing a test strip for the meter. "Yeah, while you're at school...why?"

Before Grace could say anymore, she saw JJ standing at her bedroom doorway, looking around.

"Mommy?"

"Henry's out of test strips, I was hoping you had some."

Hotch wiped an alcohol swab over Grace's finger as he turned around. "These are the last she's got. Have we not got any downstairs...or..?"

JJ shook her head, walking into the room. "No, I've checked. I'll go out now and get some."

"Are you sure?" Hotch pressed, "We have 12 left. That can get us through tomorrow for the both of them. Tomorrow we can order some more."

"Right," JJ said, taking a test strip from Grace's kit, "I guess that can work. We also need ketone strips. I thought we had some, but apparently not."

Hotch laughed as he watched JJ break into a grin. "We're losing it, aren't we?"

"I think so," the woman laughed, walking out, "aren't we, Grace?"

The 5 year old laughed. "It's because you have too many kids, I told you!"

"You can never have too many kids," Hotch said, reading Grace's meter, "but you can have too much glucose in your blood."

"What?" Grace asked.

"I have to adjust your insulin for tonight. We must've been a few counts off of your dessert. Let's fix that."

Hotch finished testing Grace and went to kiss the other children. He made his way down the hall to Ben and Tyler's room, and as he was coming out, Jack had stopped him.

"Dad..." He said softly, "dad, can I talk to you?"

Hotch's eyebrows furrowed as he studied the expression on his son's face. After taking a few seconds to make the decision in his head, he nodded. "Is it something mom and I can both know?"

The young boy nodded, looking into his dad's eyes.

"Then go wait with mom in our bedroom," he said, "I'll be in."

When Jack walked into his parents' room, JJ gave him a weird look. "Do you need a second hug and a kiss?" She asked.

Jack shook his head. "I'm here to talk to you and dad."

"Ouch," JJ scoffed, "that hurt."

"Sorry...it's...it's sort of serious," Jack said, "it's about Ben."

Hotch had just caught what his son had said as he slipped into the bedroom. He closed the door behind him and went and sat on the bed beside his wife.

"What about Ben?" He asked, concern evident in his voice.

"I...I think," he began, "I think he's...being bullied."

JJ swallowed thickly as she looked at her husband with concerned eyes. "You think...what?"

"I think," he repeated, "that Ben's being bullied."

"When did he tell you about this?" Hotch asked.

Jack bit his lip. "A couple weeks ago...but I didn't want to tell you because he didn't want me to and I promised him."

"Do you know what happened to him?" JJ asked softly, almost as if she were interrogating somebody.

"He has bruises, and I told him I didn't think kids his age could do that, but they can," he said, "but they'll be gone now."

Hotch sighed. "Do you know why it's happening? Is that why he's not been himself lately?"

Jack nodded, looking between his parents, "He told me they beat him up...but he never told me why. Please don't ask him!" He begged, "He can't know I told you!"

"That must be why he's stopped bathing with Grace and Tyler...because he doesn't want them to see the bruises," JJ said sadly. It hurt like hell to know that her baby boy was being hit and punched at school. What hurt the most was the fact that he had been so hesitant to tell his parents. He was 5 years old. He shouldn't feel that he can't turn to his parents, of all people.

"Alright, well," Hotch said, looking between JJ and Jack, "it's late and you have school tomorrow. We'll ask him how he's doing, and we'll go from there."

Jack hopped off of the bed and walked out of the room.

"Hey, Jack?" JJ said. The boy quickly poked his head into the bedroom. "Thank you for telling us."

"You did the right thing," Hotch added, "you're a great big brother."

* * *

Aaron had gotten used to being woken up in the middle of the night by Jennifer throwing up. It broke his heart to hear her heaving. She would lose so much energy and become dehydrated. Her pale face, absolutely drenched in sweat, was enough to make him sick, himself.

The man climbed out of bed and rushed into the bathroom to find JJ close to tears. Her sickness was horrible, much worse than before. He climbed down beside her and rubbed her back until she was done.

Dropping herself against the wall, JJ let out a deep breath. "I'm sorry," she mumbled, "you don't have to wake up to this."

"Well, I'd like to wake up to twins someday, so I'll have to, won't I?"

JJ laughed, play-punching him in the chest. "You're funny."

Looking around, Hotch laughed. "I never thought we'd find ourselves like this again," he said, "sitting here, slumped against the wall, waiting for you to throw up."

"Hey," JJ laughed, "I'm having two babies. It's not throw up...pick another word."

"We're waiting for the babies to give us a sign they're there...is that better?"

JJ grinned, leaning on his shoulder, "much."

Hotch wet a towel and placed it on JJ's forehead. He could tell that it made her feel better.

"The sickness should stop around week 14...if that helps," he assured.

JJ shook her head, almost laughing as she looked down. "No...it won't. I have a feeling it will only get worse from here. Remember how bad it was with Tyler, Ben, and Grace? I was convinced I was a vomiting machine."

"Those three...were triplets, JJ. They said it was normal for you to have more severe sickness because it's twins. With the triplets you were having sickness until week 20...and you had them almost 7 weeks later."

"Ew," the woman groaned, bringing herself up to the toilet bowl, "I wish this would just end."

Hotch sighed, rubbing her back, "me too."

* * *

Once the children had been dropped off at school, JJ and Hotch went to their OB appointment. The stress was beginning to pile up. Hotch was worried about JJ. She had a panic disorder, and between everything that was going on, he was worried that she would completely lose it. They were looking at new houses, and on top of that, they were trying to handle the expenses of Grace and Henry's medication. Having twins certainly added to that stress.

"So, you're 11 weeks along," Kayla said, wiping gel onto JJ's stomach, "and you're showing...which is a great sign. Have you started having cravings?"

JJ nodded, "apparently I'm craving smoothies and cupcakes...but I'm unable to keep them down."

"You are craving smoothies and cupcakes," Hotch laughed, "I rushed out four times this past weekend to Jamba Juice and Razzle Dazzle...it's definitely a craving."

The OB laughed to herself. "Well, cravings are a sign that your morning sickness is subsiding. Within a week or two, you'll begin eating a lot more."

JJ groaned, "and I'll look more like a whale than ever."

"Alright," Kayla started, "your due date is Sunday, November 19. I can safely say that with your past history of early births, and the fact that it's twins, you should expect to go into labour around early November."

Hotch smiled, squeezing JJ's hand tightly. "Are you able to determine the genders?"

Kayla shook her head, "it's too early to even guess, really. But, if you look up on the monitor, you'll be able to clearly see their outlines."

JJ began to cry as she studied the two white figures on the screen. Turning to Hotch, she smiled. "Those are ours."

"Gender can be determined between 19 and 21 weeks...and I am sure these two will make it clear by then. They'll also begin to move around 15 weeks. Since you've been pregnant before, you'll begin noticing them earlier...about as early as 13 weeks."

Hotch grinned. He was over the moon about his children growing. At this point, he didn't mind running out in his pyjamas to pick up 2 boxes of cupcakes at 4am. He didn't mind blending smoothies for his wife at 2am. He didn't care how crazy he looked. Life was crazy...and he loved every minute of it.

* * *

**Review and ask questions!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Here's chapter 10! I hope you like it!**

* * *

Dinner around the Jareau-Hotchner table wasn't exactly a normal one. With 6 children all under 12, there was bound to be some form of entertainment taking away from eating.

Tonight, it was Grace, going on about her new dance company jackets. She was so excited about them, telling practically everyone she knew about how pretty they were.

"It even has my name on the side!" She exclaimed, her face lighting up.

JJ grinned. "You haven't eaten any of your peas or sweetcorn," she said, "I think someone's a bit too excited."

"Yeah, come on, Gracie, they're just jackets," Henry said, "what's so special about them?"

Grace's jaw dropped. "Have you seen them? They are more pretty than our soccer jackets."

Jack sighed. "God, Gracie, you're such a girl!"

"I am a girl," Grace replied, "what's your excuse?"

"I'm a boy," Jack answered, "and I'm older than you. Can you please stop going on about your jacket? That's boring!"

Grace frowned. "Your boy stuff makes me bored and there's 6 boys in this house. Mommy and me are always doing boy stuff with you."

"You can live with it," Jack said, rolling his eyes.

"And you can live with this!" Grace answered.

Hotch smirked. "I think I know where she got her debate skills from," he said, "hey, Plum, you'd be great as a media liaison."

"That was Mommy's old job," she said, "right?"

JJ nodded. "It was."

"And she was the best media liaison ever," Hotch said.

"I'm going to climb across that table and smother you if you don't quit," JJ smirked, absolutely into him.

Grace and Benjamin grimaced. "Ew!"

"They're going to do it on the table!" Henry muttered, "oh my God."

"We're not doing it on the table," JJ said, "don't be silly. You all need to know that mommies and daddies share a special love that isn't as gross as you think."

Jack held an uneasy face as he looked between his parents. "We're eating dinner."

"I know we are, and that's why this topic is shutting down," JJ said, "come on, let's go get dessert."

* * *

"Are you sure you want to find out today?" Kayla asked, covering JJ's belly with gel.

JJ and Hotch nodded. "We're moving in a few days and we're still painting...so it would help a bit if we had everything done before they arrive."

Today was the day that JJ and Hotch would finally find out the gender of the twins. There wasn't a particular gender in favour, though it was easy to tell that Grace especially wanted girls. The boys didn't have a preference. They weren't as interested in the pregnancy as Grace was, which was understandable.

Grace had begged for weeks to go with her parents to this appointment. She wanted to know what was going on inside her mother's body, and she wanted to get closer with her mom. Both were very understandable, as she was the only girl in the family and this was something that happened to women.

"You can clearly see both babies right here," Kayla said, moving the wand over JJ's stomach. "Baby B looks squished up against your ribs...you probably have a bit of difficulty breathing, right?"

JJ nodded, "yeah...it's gotten worse. It's a struggle walking up the stairs."

"This is totally normal. B is pushing against your diaphragm, causing you to have difficulty breathing. You won't absolutely suffocate, though," she laughed, "and this is about the worst you'll get."

"Can I have 2 sisters?" Grace blurted out.

Kayla smiled at the girl and continued moving the wand over JJ's stomach.

"I have the sex of the babies right here, if you want me to show you." She said.

"Yeah!" Grace yelled.

JJ and Hotch laughed a little. "Sure," JJ said, "I think Grace is more anxious than any of us."

Turning the monitor, Kayla pointed to the figures. "You have 2 little boys in there," she said.

Grace shook her head. "No! It's 2 girls! I want sisters!"

"Gracie," Hotch began, as he pulled her in closely. "It's 2 boys...we can't change that."

"Uh, 7 boys," JJ said with wide eyes, "we're going to have 7 boys."

Kayla wiped the gel off of JJ's belly and put her gloves and wand away. "I'll leave you in here for a minute while I get the papers."

JJ gave her a sincere smile and watched her leave.

"I don't like boys," Grace moaned, poking at JJ's belly, "they're bad! Tell them they're bad!"

"Grace, mommy is having 2 boys. We can't change that. Please don't act up like this," Hotch said, "you know what we told you before we came. You can't cry over this, okay?"

The girl looked at her mother and started crying.

JJ sighed as she sat up. "Grace," she said sternly, "please don't-"

"Why can't I get sisters?" She cried, "why can't Isabel still be alive? I just want a sister!"

Hotch bit his lip. "Grace, come here," he said, "don't start this now."

"The boys always get what they want!" She shouted, falling into her father's arms. "I don't want to be the only girl! I want a sister!"

The room went quiet for a moment. Nobody knew what to say. After a minute, JJ finally worked up the courage to say something.

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

* * *

"Would you quit crying?" JJ yelled to her daughter angrily. "I can't change what I'm having!"

"You're so mean!" Grace cried, trying to hit her mother. "I don't want those babies!"

Anger tore through JJ as she grabbed the girl's wrists and held them tightly.

"Well, I do want those babies, Grace. You need to stop acting like this or I'll take you to a doctor, because you're not supposed to act out like this," JJ said, sternly.

"You're just mad because you wanted girls, too," Grace snapped, "but now you only have me and you hate me so you have no girls left!"

JJ sighed. She couldn't stay calm anymore. This was it. She didn't want to think of bad things, like hitting the girl, or dragging her somewhere, but the thoughts kept coming to her.

"If you don't leave this room right now, I'll make sure you never dance again. I will cancel your classes."

"You're not the boss of me!" Grace yelled, throwing her foot to the ground.

JJ's nostrils flared. "You wanna bet?" She retorted.

"You can't do anything to me without daddy's help," Grace said, "and daddy won't let you hit me."

"Stop it. Now!" JJ shouted.

Grace was furious. "I hate you and those babies so much!" She screamed, kicking and punching at her mother with considerable force. "I wish you never got them inside of you ever!"

"Ok, Grace, say what you want," JJ said, once again, grabbing the girl's clenched fists, "but you can't hit me and get away with it. I am your mother and kids don't hit their mothers."

"But I hate you so I can!" The 5 year old yelled, kicking JJ hard in the thigh.

JJ pushed Grace back onto the couch. She knew there was going to be a huge bruise, and it was going to hurt like hell for days.

"You hurt mommy," JJ said, angrily, "you're not allowed to hurt anyone!"

"I don't love you anymore!" Grace screamed, digging her nails into JJ's arm.

"You think by hurting me that I won't have these babies? You think that will help you get your way? Forget it, Gracelyn. It's not happening!"

Grace screamed, kicking JJ's shins. "I play soccer, I can hurt you!" She threatened.

"I got a scholarship from playing soccer, I could hurt you even worse," JJ shot back, holding her daughter against the couch so that she couldn't kick or punch. "But I'm not going to because you're my daughter."

"I'm never leaving you two in the house alone again," Hotch said, running into the living room. "What the hell is going on in here?"

Grace got loose from JJ's hold and ran over to her father. "Mommy's being mean to me!" She yelled.

"Aaron, please take her away from me. I don't want to look at her," JJ said, softly, making her way to the stairs.

"Grace-Gracelyn!" Hotch raised his voice, grabbing the girl to hold her still, causing her to become frightened. "You never EVER hurt mommy, especially when she's pregnant, you hear me? You've just caused her a lot of pain, and I don't think she's going to forgive you for a long time."

Grace bit her tongue to stop herself from saying anything more.

"Me and you are going to have a long chat tonight. You need to accept the fact that you're getting two brothers. It's not going to change. Nobody can change it."

"You're always on her side!" Grace yelled.

Hotch held the girl against him. "I know you're upset because you want girls, but believe me, this doesn't change anything. All you've done is make mommy upset, and now she doesn't want to talk to you. You need to say sorry to her. You're old enough to know what sorry means. Don't go now, but after I talk to you tonight, we're going to go and tell her sorry."

"I don't even want more kids in this family," she said in a quiet voice, "you have too many, and you're forgetting about everyone else."

"That's not true. I'm not happy with you, Gracelyn. I can't believe you hurt her. I didn't expect that from you," Hotch said, "and now you have to figure out how to say sorry to her."

Grace looked down. "I didn't mean to," she said, "I just want a sister."

"I know you do, but hurting mommy doesn't make a sister. It makes things worse. We need to go and get you calmed down, don't we? I'm sure your levels are everywhere. You can't do this anymore."

"Can you tell her sorry? I don't like her and she doesn't like me."

"Only you can," Hotch said, taking her to the kitchen, "she's very, very upset."

* * *

"Boys?!" Henry asked, excitedly, looking around at his brothers.

JJ and Hotch grinned. "Boys."

"Isn't that like...7 boys?" Jack asked, "because that's awesome!"

"Where's Grace? She wanted to know," Tyler pointed out, "she can't miss this."

Hotch looked at JJ and then back at the kids. "She's a bit...upset because she wanted sisters...but, brothers are awesome, right?"

"I don't think she would like having sisters," Jack said, "She wouldn't like missing out on the attention."

"That's a valid point, my man," Hotch said, "you need to tell her that."

JJ looked at her boys and smiled proudly, leaning on her husband. "7 boys?" She laughed, looking up at him.

"7 boys," he swallowed thickly, putting his arm around her. "And they're all ours."

* * *

"I think that's the last box," Hotch said, looking around at the box-filled ground floor of the new house.

"I wish I could've helped you," JJ frowned, wrapping her arms around her husband.

Hotch turned around and gave her a look. "You're not serious," he said, playfully poking at her bump. "You're bringing our little boys into the world and you want to help me? JJ, you've got to slow down."

"No, I am not slowing down," JJ said, putting her hands on her back. "I don't care how badly my back aches, I will not slow down."

"Jennifer," Hotch laughed, "you're doing too much. You're going to end up tiring yourself out, and you know that will cause stress on the boys, and next thing you know, you'll go into early labor."

JJ laughed. "I didn't know you were a doctor," she said.

He smiled as he looked into her eyes. "I did research because I want to be ready when you can't get out of bed. I want to be ready to help you down the stairs every day. I want to be ready to...to show you I love you, that I care."

"You do beyond that," JJ said, "and you've done so much already."

"I'll say it again," Hotch began, "you're giving me 2 more sons. You can't expect me to just sit back and let you struggle with everyday tasks."

JJ smirked, attempting to look past her belly. "I can't put my shoes and socks on anymore," she said, smiling, "and that's the only thing I need your help with. I can manage everything else on my own."

"You're 19 weeks pregnant, babe," Hotch breathed, "I just don't want you to be afraid to come to me when you need things. I know we've been through this before, but every pregnancy is different...and I don't want you to put all this on yourself."

"I'm not," JJ said, "I know how much I can handle...and I'll let you know when I want to slow down."

Hotch gave JJ a sincere smile as he flattened his lips. "As long as you do," he said.

* * *

Hearing the soft footsteps of his wife, Hotch turned around. JJ was standing in front of him, holding her belly.

"Morning beautiful," he said, kissing her forehead, "how did you sleep?"

"Terribly," JJ groaned, "these two were wide awake all night, and just when they stopped moving around, I was trying to get to sleep, and I had to test Henry."

Hotch stroked her hair back off of her face. "Now will you let me take over for nights? As soon as the boys come, you won't get any sleep...and right now, you need it more than ever."

"You're right," JJ said, "but I'm not helpless...I'm pregnant. It's getting harder to move around, and sweeping floors and making beds isn't fun at all."

"You need to let me step in right now," Hotch said, "I'm gonna say this again; as soon as it gets hard, you stop. You just...stop. You need to tell yourself that you're a goddess...a beautiful goddess," he smiled.

JJ pursed her lips. "Where exactly are you going with this?" She asked.

"I'm trying to say that...you're a goddess. You deserve to rest, and feel beautiful, and know that you have a huge support system ready when you need it," he smiled at JJ, making her look down and grin. "In fact, I don't think you remember asking Spencer and Penelope over later, do you?"

"Is that today?" JJ asked, eyes wide. "We need to clean up and get the kids dressed!"

Hotch stopped JJ from moving and looked her in the eyes. "Relax...they're coming over to help us out. Spencer can't wait to help us unpack, and Penelope can't wait to be with the kids. We're gonna be fine."

"We better be, or I'll kick your ass," she smirked.

* * *

"Nostalgia," JJ remarked, rummaging through the kids' boxes. "It gets to the best of us."

"I found that picture of the triplets from last year," Hotch laughed, passing Reid the frame, "that one that makes you laugh so much. Look at them," he said.

Reid laughed as he examined the picture of his God-daughter, with her arms around her brothers, all shirtless. "This will forever be my favourite of them," he said.

"What's this?" He then asked, pulling a tape out of the box. He blew the dust off of it and held it up, trying to make out what it read.

'Jenny's Goal, 1989'

"That's one of the only things I have left of Rosaline," JJ said, "she filmed it. I'll never forget the moment she yelled, 'Jenny, you better get this goal, or I'll turn the camera off!' It makes me laugh every time."

Reid smiled sincerely as he placed it into it's own box.

"She died the week after," JJ continued, "and the day after I found her...I...I kept re-watching it, over and over again...just to hear her voice. I needed to hear that last 'Jenny'...because I knew that one day, I would forget," she flattened her lips, stopping herself from tearing up. "And I don't want to forget the one person who made me feel like I mattered...you know?"

"Jen, I found your sonograms," Hotch said, opening an envelope full of black and white images.

JJ smiled, pouring them out onto the ground.

"Who are these?" Reid asked, picking up a picture.

"That was Ben and Tyler...and I don't know if you can see or not, but Grace is actually squished under Tyler. They're still like that."

Reid and Hotch laughed. "They had their own little play place inside of you," Hotch said, "and I remember you used to make me watch your belly moving as they pushed around. I got so freaked out when you told me there was a foot sticking out near your belly button."

"This was taken the day Grace was diagnosed," Reid said, holding up a picture of himself holding 6 month old Grace. "I remember this day so clearly," he said, "I just remember you calling me in tears, attempting to explain that she had lost all this weight...and that I was right."

"Are you kidding?" Hotch exclaimed. "You saved her life. We wouldn't have known any different. We were still trying to get used to the idea of having triplets...and we were so happy to have a little girl...and then this happened. We had literally just gotten Ben and Tyler to sleep, and Grace was unresponsive, so we immediately freaked out and took all the kids to the hospital. We were so clueless," he said.

JJ took the picture from Reid and smiled. "I think this can go up in the hallway upstairs, right beside Henry's diagnosis day."

"Look at their individual pictures," Hotch remarked, pulling out photos of their children. "I loved this shoot so much."

"They're growing up so fast," JJ said, rubbing her belly to soothe the kicking babies. "I just want all this to last forever."

* * *

**Review! :)**


	8. Chapter 8

**Here's chapter 8! I hope you enjoy :) **

* * *

Looking up as she finished the last packed lunch, JJ sighed. "Gang! Your lunches are packed!"

She watched as a huge pack of 5 children came racing down the stairs. Each one was just as fast as the other.

"I'm taking you all to school today. Let's go."

"Mommy, Tyler's hitting me!" Grace yelled, toppling onto the couch under her brother.

JJ dropped the triplets' bags at the door and walked over to where the two fighting children were. Just a few steps would cause her to become out of breath.

"Both of you stop it now!" She raised her voice.

"Can you stop him?!" Grace yelled, hitting her brother away.

"No, I'm not standing on one side anymore," JJ stated, "both of you are being blamed because you're both causing us to be later than we already are."

Tyler moaned, "but it's not my fault! She started it!"

The babies were pushing against JJ's diaphragm, causing her to lose her breath faster than ever. Walking downstairs was now a chore. She wasn't ready to stress herself out more than she already was.

"I don't care. Both of you grab your bags and let's get in the car. If we don't go now, we'll be late."

The door had been shut for about 10 seconds, when JJ realised what she was missing. No...it was who she was missing.

"Of course I forget someone," JJ muttered to herself as she picked up her 3 year old son. "Of course I do."

"Who are you mad at?" Luke asked.

JJ laughed to herself. "Mommy is just stressed...and your brother and sister were fighting."

"They always fight," Luke retorted, laughing.

"Just imagine them as teenagers," JJ mumbled, locking the door for hopefully the final time that morning.

* * *

"Her A1C is 7.2, which is right on point. You've done a great job of managing her levels these past 3 months," Dr. Kelly, Grace's endocrinologist smiled.

JJ grinned as she rubbed her belly, "it's been hard, but I think we're doing okay now, aren't we?"

Grace nodded proudly, adjusting her medical ID bracelet that sat around her left wrist.

"I'm just a little bit concerned about how you feel, Grace," Kelly said, looking directly at the small blonde. "How do you feel usually?"

"I'm sorry, what is this?" JJ asked. "What are you doing?"

"Well," Kelly said, "it's important for children to be able to communicate their feelings...and by age 5, most children have a feeling towards their illness. Talking about their issues and expressing themselves is a crucial part of development. I've worked with children who have many brothers and sisters, and if there's one thing that's come out of this is...the fact that they feel like they have no voice. We want them to know that we're listening."

Grace shuffled in her seat, holding onto the armrests.

"How many brothers and sisters do you have?" Kelly asked softly.

"I have 5 brothers and 2 more on the way, but I don't know what they are yet," She beamed.

Kelly smiled at JJ and looked back at the girl.

"How do you feel about diabetes? Do you like it? Does it take away from what you want to do?"

Grace shook her head. "I can still dance, and play soccer, and play flute...but sometimes I don't like waking up in the middle of the night to get needles because they sometimes a hurt."

"They sometimes hurt?" Kelly asked.

Grace nodded, playing with the end of her grey skirt that was part of her school uniform.

"Well, it would hurt your body more if you didn't have insulin, right? So those needles are important."

"Do you think there will be a cure one day?" The youngster inquired.

Kelly shrugged sadly. "You know what, Sweetie? I don't know. Scientists have been working for ages to find the cure, but for right now, we don't know. Do you wish there was?"

Grace thought for a moment. "I told my brother about this the other night," she began, "and we both want a cure, but maybe diabetes isn't supposed to have a cure because people with diabetes can still live normally, right?"

Kelly nodded, looking over at JJ, who held a proud smile on her face.

"It's like my friend, Eleanor, who has asthma. She said it can't be cured, but she can still do everything without stopping. It's just...if you think you're having an asthma attack, you get out your puffer. I think that diabetes doesn't have to have a cure...I mean, it would be nice," she giggled, "but it only slows us down a bit, and we can still live without a cure."

"That's all very right," Kelly said, "you're such a smart little cookie!"

"And," Grace added, "everyone has something that slows them down, but they just work with it...they don't always need a cure."

JJ bit her lip. "Grace, where'd you get all that from?" She asked.

"Me and Henry talk about diabetes when we go to bed and we make experiments for diabetes cures!" She explained, proudly.

"She's very past her age," Kelly smiled, "which isn't such a bad thing regarding this illness," she told JJ, "but just make sure she's at peace with diabetes and she knows who her supports are."

JJ nodded, "that's enforced...she's got wonderful godparents, grandparents, friends, and other family members who are fully supportive of her."

"Then you both should be good to go. Maintain those amazing levels, okay Grace?"

"Okay!" Grace beamed, catching her mother's hand as they exited the office together.

* * *

"Don't forget Luke this time," Grace reminded, going out to the garage as she watched her mother rush around the main floor for her keys.

JJ laughed. "Oh, I won't."

"Your keys are on the front table...where you left them," Ben said, working at getting his shoes on.

The woman spun around and made her way to the foyer, where, like Ben had said, were her keys.

"I am losing my mind," JJ huffed, letting Henry and Jack out. "Come on, let's go!"

Tyler and Ben were still putting on their jackets, causing JJ to become impatient. It was little things like this that made JJ stressed.

"Tick tock, guys," JJ reminded, "you're going to be late."

"Henry and Jack are fighting in the car!" Grace announced, rushing back inside from the garage.

JJ groaned, helping Luke get his coat zipped up. "Could you tell them to stop?"

"They're not going to listen to a 5 year old," Grace said, "you come and tell them!"

"Can't you see I'm doing something?" JJ snapped, taking her son's hand.

"At least you didn't forget him this time," the young girl crossed her arms.

JJ went out to the garage and got everybody in the car. After making sure each child was strapped in, she took a small moment to lean against the car. How the hell did they do this everyday?

"Alright, Ben and Tyler, have you got your instruments?" She asked, looking back at her boys.

They nodded. "Yep! All ready for music!"

"Jack and Henry, you guys have your soccer uniforms," JJ checked, eyeing the reeking bags of soccer cleats and shorts.

"You're going to be there tonight, right mom?" Jack asked.

JJ looked back. "What?"

"At our game," Henry answered.

The mother groaned. The car hadn't gotten out of the driveway yet, and here she was, ready to slam it into a tree.

"That's tonight?" She sighed. "I have an appointment, and I need to take Luke for his 3 year check up."

Grace whined, looking pitifully out of the window. "So does that mean you can't come to my practice?"

JJ shook her head, dropping her head on the wheel. "Gang, you need to understand that I'm having two babies. I'm very tired, and your daddy is, too...and we need our time, just as much as you need yours. Being parents is a very tough job, okay? We're very busy."

"But I wanted you there tonight!" The little girl whined, banging her head on the window.

The mother sighed and looked back at her 6 children. "Grace, remember what I said...you have 5 other siblings I need to help."

"But when the babies come, you'll be spending all your time with them, and we won't even go to soccer and dance and music." Henry said.

"Alright, well, we're having a chat when we get back...and we need to go," JJ said, starting the engine, "Tyler and Ben have music, Jack and Henry have soccer, Grace has dance, and Luke is coming with me. All set. Let's go."

* * *

Pressing the covers to her 3 year old, JJ smiled. Bedtime had gotten better and better. Now that Luke was fully sleeping through nights, everybody was seemingly happier. However, that would change as the babies came. Though JJ wasn't quite ready for it, she was excited. These were the last few weeks where she could live normally until things became difficult and uncomfortable.

"Mommy, can I see the babies?" Luke asked sweetly, smiling at his mother.

JJ laughed. "When they come out, you can."

Luke grinned, poking at JJ's rather large belly. "When?"

"In about 23 weeks," she said, "so about 5 months. Just after Halloween."

"Cool!" Luke said, "but how do you take pictures of them?"

JJ laughed, turning off the bedside lamp. "I go to the doctor and they use a special wand that shows us what the babies look like...but I'll show you them tomorrow if you want."

Luke nodded, turning over. "Night mommy."

"Goodnight."

JJ checked the attic and top floor and said goodnight to everyone. As usual, she stood at the top of the stairs and gave her reminders.

"Henry, Grace," she began, "you know to record your check marks. I'll be checking in the morning. Tyler, please don't sleep in your glasses, Grace, you don't either. No getting up before 8am. Tomorrow is Saturday, so sleep in. And lastly, daddy's coming home tomorrow, so get some rest now and you won't be tired."

"Okay!" She heard from every room, making her smile. The kids had a tendency to speak out at the same time, which never failed to disappoint. She was happy.

* * *

**Review!**


	9. Chapter 9

**Here's chapter 9! I hope you are enjoying the story so far!**

* * *

Wrapping her arms around him, JJ sighed in relief.

"You're home," she breathed at his neck, "finally."

The man laughed as he stroked her blonde locks around her ear. They embraced for what felt like an eternity. He was home, and JJ couldn't have been happier.

"This was my first case without you," Hotch said, pulling JJ in gently by her waist, "and I couldn't stop thinking about you...the kids...the babies."

JJ's eyes went wide as she looked up at him. "Do you need leave?"

"No...no," he said, "I was just worried...but I'm okay now. I have your waist in my hands and that is much better than a gun."

JJ smiled. "You bet it is," she said, kissing him passionately. Their eyes opened slowly as they began to look at each other.

"I missed you so much," he whispered, cupping her cheeks.

The blonde bit her lip. "You need to take that suit off," she whispered into his ear seductively.

"Then let's go," he mumbled, his lips not wanting to detach themselves from his wife's.

* * *

Hearing the footsteps again, his head shot up. Aaron Hotchner was a great sleeper. He slept through anything and everything. That worried him a bit, as he was afraid he would sleep through JJ going into labor and that scared him.

He turned over and, to his surprise, JJ was gone. He leapt out of bed and slowly opened the door. The end of the hallway was lit by Tyler's nightlight that was shining out of his and Ben's room. Making sure he wasn't making any creaking noises, Hotch looked down at his feet and cringed every few steps.

The man got downstairs and walked down the hall until he got to the kitchen. A light was shining from the formal living room, just left of it.

"JJ?" He whispered, pushing the door open.

She was plumping pillows and cleaning the couch.

Nesting.

He sighed. "JJ, it's 3am...you can do this tomorrow."

"No...no, I can't do that," she said, "I'll go crazy. The house needs to be perfect for the babies."

"You know we're moving next week...don't you?" Hotch laughed, "Because it seems as though you've forgotten."

JJ shook her head. "I'm not packing...no, not yet. That's not happening. When I pack everything up, I need you here to keep me sane."

"Who said it was wrong to be insane?" Hotch asked, putting out his arms, "come here."

"Wow, we're really moving," JJ sighed. "I didn't...I didn't think we'd need to move."

Hotch shrugged. "The other house made the kids really happy, and it'll be a lot better in the long run. Especially when the kids get older and bigger...the house will get smaller. I think we're doing it at the perfect time, too," he said, "because you're not far enough along that you're completely done."

JJ laughed, burying her head in his chest. "I've been done for a long time," she said, "but I think you're right."

Hotch nodded.

"So," JJ began, "can we go over to the new house now and move in?"

"At 3am?" Hotch asked, raising an eyebrow.

JJ's eyes widened. "I'm carrying your babies, you know."

"When did they become mine?" He inquired, laughing.

"Since the night you decided to spermify my insides. Happy?"

Hotch laughed, cuddling her as they moved onto the couch. "Very. Don't worry, we'll get through this. We'll go over to the house tomorrow if you want...when it's light out."

JJ smiled, closing her eyes. Her head lay on his chest, completely surrounded by the feeling of safety. His finger made swirls around her right cheek and spun through her locks of hair.

"Sleep tight," he whispered, "I love you."

* * *

He blinked his eyes a few times to adjust to the light the living room gave off. Remembering where he was, he looked beside him and all at once, he remembered the way they fell asleep. He looked over her shoulder and saw how she was holding her belly with her right hand. He carefully slipped his hands over hers and held it with her.

The man tried closing his eyes, but something kept stopping him.

Movement.

His eyes bulged as he felt the babies moving inside of JJ's belly. This was the first time he'd ever felt them moving. It was at this time that everything sort of...clicked. This was really happening. He was feeling two unborn children moving around in his wife's stomach. It felt so surreal. He really couldn't believe it. The feeling of pride had washed over him, and once again, he was happy to be home.

"Can you feel it too?"

Hotch moved when he heard JJ's soft whisper.

"Yeah...that's..wow," he said, "how do you feel?"

JJ grinned, cradling her belly. "Tired..my back aches..I feel like I can't breathe," she listed, "but above all, happy...I'm with you."

"Do you want breakfast? I think I hear Ben and Tyler," Hotch asked, slowly moving JJ so that he could get up without harming her, "I can bring it here."

The blonde shook her head and smiled. "I can get up," she said, pulling herself to her feet, "these guys haven't weighed me down yet."

"You need breakfast," Hotch said, taking her by the hand.

JJ sighed leaning on his shoulder as they walked into the kitchen. "The biggest batch of whatever you've got," she laughed. "I'm starving."

* * *

Adjusting her sundress, Grace beamed. She was so excited about today; she was moving some of her things to the new house. She was finally getting her own room! This was such an exciting day for her. She was pumped to pick out colours, furniture, and make the entire attic her own.

"Promise me I get to pick out my own colours?" She asked, picking out her flip flops from the cupboard. "Because I don't want purple anymore."

JJ laughed, grabbing the keys off of the front table. "Course you can. Everyone gets to pick their colours."

Hotch picked up Luke and they all went out to the car.

"How much are we taking?" Henry asked.

Strapping Luke into his car seat, Hotch looked up. "I'd say about 2 boxes each. That's just your room stuff, like, lamps, rugs, all that stuff...and tonight we'll bring over all the stuff from the formal living room."

"But that's like a million boxes!" Jack said.

"We're getting help, don't worry," JJ said softly, "Uncle Derek's coming over, so dad and him will do that."

"Are we all good to go?" Hotch asked, starting the car's engine.

JJ nodded, "are you guys good to go?" She asked.

"Yep!" Each of them said, making themselves comfortable in their seats.

"Let's go then!"

* * *

"Oh sweet Jesus," JJ moaned, "kids, come back here please! You haven't gotten your shoes off yet!"

"I've got it," Hotch said, brushing past her. He ran up the stairs and pulled the trick that JJ loved best.

She laughed, listening to her husband's voice.

"There are 3 5 year olds who don't have their flip flops off!" He said in his batman voice. "I'll find you!"

JJ winced, hearing Grace's scream. She knew that Hotch had found her and was chasing after her.

"Not today, Batman!" Grace yelled, throwing her flip flops to the bottom of the stairs. "Robin wins this time!"

JJ laughed, picking up her daughter's shoes and throwing them into the pile.

"And what about two little boys who's shoes I don't have?" Hotch asked in his Batman voice. "Surrender now or I'll find you!"

The woman downstairs was filled with happiness. Hearing the children laughing and having a good time was all she wanted. This was home already.

* * *

"No!" Grace shrieked, "I want this colour! You said I could choose!"

JJ raised her eyebrows. "But this colour won't come up right when the light is on it. If you choose this colour, it will be right."

"No it won't!" The little blonde haired girl cried, stomping her foot. "You're a liar and I hate you!"

The older blonde tried going after her daughter, but it was no use. She sighed, knowing that 5 year old tantrums were by far the worst she'd ever experienced.

"Why's Grace crying?" Came a voice from the doorway.

JJ turned to see Jack, holding his colour samples. "She's upset about her room colours. The one she chose won't show up right in the daytime, so she's just a bit mad about it."

"Should I go and see if she's okay?" He asked, handing JJ his samples.

JJ shook her head. "She's 5...so no, don't. She'll sort it out herself and come to me when she's alright. We've taught them how to sort their problems out properly, and, to be honest, I think she's just very stressed and wasn't thinking."

"Why would she be stressed? Don't like adults only get stressed?"

The woman sighed. "She wants the twins to be girls...and I told her that we can't choose that. She told me if they're boys...she won't love me, which she doesn't mean, but...I didn't think she wanted girls this much. I will feel horrible if she's upset."

"I think she'll be okay..." Jack said, "I mean, I wanted more sisters, but I like having Grace as my only sister..and I don't care about boys or girls. Everyone makes a big deal out of it."

JJ laughed. "Oh, Jacks, it's a parent thing. When you have a child with someone, you'll want to know if you'll have a son, or a daughter. It's a big deal for some people."

"Do you think it's two girls or two boys?" Jack asked. "Because dad tells me that you just know."

"I don't know this time," she said, "a lot of old wives' tales say it's girls, but I keep getting the feeling it's boys...so...I don't know."

Jack sighed. "The house is going to be really busy...and I'm worried that you'll have a panic attack or something if you get too stressed."

JJ bit her lip, looking at her son. "I hope I don't have one...but it's hard to control them. When I have the babies, it'll be busy...and not only will I be up four times testing Henry and Grace, I'll be up at least 5 or 6 times a night for the twins...and it scares me, but I think we'll manage it."

"Can I hug you?" Jack asked, walking over to his mother. "I really want you to stay healthy...I've seen you crying before, and it made me cry...and I don't want to see you upset like that again."

JJ let her son bury his head into her side. "I love you," she whispered, kissing his head.

"I love you too, mom," He replied, tightening his hold around her.

* * *

Watching Luke run off with his sippy cup of juice, JJ sighed, leaning against the counter. The babies were active, and that said good things to JJ. She was afraid they'd never become active and show her that they're in there.

Hotch came in from outside, absolutely soaking wet.

"The water is warm," he said, "but I need you out there while I grab Luke," he said, "is he feeling well enough to come in?"

JJ shrugged. "I don't know...I mean, I gave him his sippy cup and he went over and jumped right onto the couch, no tv or anything."

The man sighed. "Well, I don't think anybody else is getting out of the pool until sunrise at this rate...they're all fish."

JJ went outside and stood by the pool. Jack and Henry were doing flips off of the diving board, Grace was playing kitchen in the shallow end, and Ben and Tyler were playing basketball. JJ and Hotch had taught the triplets to swim the summer before, and so far, they'd done really well. They were kicking around the shallow end, which made them satisfied. To go into the deep end, they had to put on floaties, which they didn't like. They wanted to be just like their older brothers.

Grace was sitting on the side of the pool, making milkshakes out of the pool water. She'd taken a love for cooking, and watching her father cook up all of these exquisite meals, she thought she'd have a try herself. She had made pancakes the other morning for the whole family, and JJ knew she was destined to be the next best chef.

"He's not doing well."

Turning around, JJ looked at her husband.

"He's throwing up...I think he's got the flu," Hotch said, "I've just put him in our bed so he'll fall asleep...There's ibuprofen on my side table if you're up there at 11pm."

JJ sighed, looking back to the children playing in the pool.

"I'm going to lose it if Henry or Grace gets sick. Do you remember the last time Henry was sick?" She asked. "He lost so much fluid...and his levels were everywhere, and Grace was crying...if this happens again, I'm...I..I don't know what I would do."

"JJ," Hotch said, "I know you're worried, but believe me, it will be okay. We've had Grace and Henry under control for years...we're practically pros. This is just the flu...and the chances of them getting it are very very low."

"Damn," JJ added, "Luke's flu vaccine was scheduled for next week, as well."

Hotch grinned. "Exactly...I think we're losing it."

JJ turned to raise a concerned look at him when he put his finger to her mouth.

"In the best way possible," he finished, kissing her nose.

Trying to get the negative thoughts out of their minds, JJ and Hotch sat on their deck, watching 5 of their children playing in the pool. If only this would last forever.

* * *

Twisting her cup in her hands, JJ held a thoughtful face as she looked out the back window.

"Is our backyard really that interesting?"

JJ turned around and gave her husband a soft smile. "Sorry?"

"What's on your mind?" He prodded.

She opened her mouth to say something, but she closed it again, trying to configure a string of words to say.

"I've been thinking a lot lately...about the kids, about the house...about us," she said quietly, looking up at him, "...does it get easier?"

Hotch let the words register in his head before he went around to the kettle and poured the remaining hot water into his cup. "I think it'll always be hard," he answered, "but that's...that's not the answer you're looking for."

JJ flattened her lips and looked back down at her tea.

"How long have you been thinking about this?" He asked, stirring his coffee powder into his cup of water.

"A while," JJ answered, quietly, "...I was called into work the other day, and I nearly pulled on those horrible, tight fitting pants...and that thought just stopped me," she said, "I don't think it gets easier, and that frightens me more than it should."

Hotch looked at his wife, desperately wishing he could figure out what exactly was happening to her.

"What do you mean?" He stressed, sitting at the counter. "What's happening to you?"

JJ swallowed, which was very evident, and looked up at Hotch. "Last week, while you were away, I had an appointment."

"Please don't tell me there's something wrong with the-"

"It's not them, Aaron, it's me."

Hotch put his hand on JJ's shoulder and turned her so that she was facing him. Her sad expression would've been an easy giveaway, but now he wasn't so sure.

"JJ-"

"I'm depressed...they...they...diagnosed me with antenatal depression."

The man swallowed thickly as his face fell from it's expression. "Is that even possible? How do you get-"

"It's linked to my panic disorder," she mumbled, turning back to look out to the dark backyard. "Everything that's happened is because of this stupid panic disorder...and I can't get rid of it."

Hotch bit his lip. The words weren't coming to him. He wanted to say something but he couldn't. He couldn't even force himself to say it.

"It makes me frustrated," she said shakily, "how I can't have this...this perfect non-disordered mind...that you have. I can't...I can't do what you can do...I can't walk into the middle of the field anymore without shaking and crying," she stammered, "I can't be myself anymore!"

"JJ, please don't say that...don't...just...don't say that," Hotch said, "Look, I don't care if you have depression...it doesn't change you...it's just a part of you...and I love every part of you."

JJ scoffed lightly, her nose flaring as tears began to well up in her eyes. "Trust me...you won't love this part," she said, drying her wet eyes, "this part...deserves nothing. It's given me hell for the past few years now...and I am sick and tired of not winning."

Hotch shook his head, putting his hands over JJ's to stop her nervous cup twisting. "But I need you to see that this is in your head...okay? It's not physically there."

"It's a black cloud," JJ said as softly as she could, "that's what they call it. It's this...this big, black, ugly cloud that hovers over you wherever you go...and it's like...everyone can see it. Everyone knows that you have depression, and they treat you differently."

"You're still my JJ," Hotch said, pushing her hair back past her ears, "and you'll always be my JJ...whether you've got depression, or anxiety, or a panic disorder."

"See?" JJ said quietly, "you have to list all of my disorders and illnesses...it's not right."

Hotch looked at JJ sadly. "You're managing everything so well...and I don't want you to think that you're not. I've never seen anyone raise 6 kids," he said, "be pregnant with twins, deal with depression, anxiety, have panic attacks, and manage 2 children with diabetes all at once."

"I'm not trying to break a record," JJ mumbled, "it's not impressive...none of this is. What will the kids' friends' parents say when they meet me? What? Stop having kids? Stop...stop being me?"

"People counting our children in the grocery store and suggesting we stop having them is different than you being you. Depression has a stigma, JJ, and I know you know that. There's something that makes depression embarrassing to have, and there shouldn't be."

JJ scoffed. "People won't look at me the same! When we go to work, you'll pull me out of the field and tell me I'm 'in no shape', and Morgan won't let me walk by myself, and Garcia won't let me leave this house, and Reid would refer me to a dozen and a half therapists, and you'll all look at me as weak...and I'm afraid I'll lose my job," she let a tear fall, this time not afraid to do so. "All because of this stupid illness."

"Reid has migraines nearly everyday, and sometimes, I tell him to go with Morgan to the morgue because I'm worried that the light will make it worse...and you'd never know unless I told you, right?"

JJ nodded, wrapping her arms around him like he was her lifeline. "I don't want them to know," she said.

"They don't have to," he answered, pulling her into his hold, "but you need to tell me when you're having a bad day."

"I will," she sniffled burying her face into his neck.

Hotch sighed, rubbing JJ's back in gentle circles. He could hear her little whimpers and cries as she shook against his body. "We'll be okay," he whispered, "maybe not today, but one day we will."

* * *

Grace screamed as she ran into her newly-painted room. The shade of blue that JJ had picked out was just right. It was a light blue that made the room look airy and fresh. It made the sloped roofs stand out. She was ecstatic.

"This is my room," She said, almost as if she didn't believe it. "And it's pretty!"

When she saw her mom, she began to smile. She ran over to her and threw her arms around her.

"Do you like it, Plum?" She asked softly, playing with the child's hair.

"Momma, I love it!" She shrieked. "It's so pretty, and it even matches my dress!"

JJ smiled, watching the girl run around her new room. "Later tonight we'll move your stuff in and next week, we'll be living here...isn't that exciting?"

"Yeah! I can't wait to tell Eleanor!" She exclaimed.

"I think we'll like it here," JJ said, "a lot."

* * *

**Review!**


	10. Chapter 10

**Here's chapter 10! I hope you like it!**

* * *

Dinner around the Jareau-Hotchner table wasn't exactly a normal one. With 6 children all under 12, there was bound to be some form of entertainment taking away from eating.

Tonight, it was Grace, going on about her new dance company jackets. She was so excited about them, telling practically everyone she knew about how pretty they were.

"It even has my name on the side!" She exclaimed, her face lighting up.

JJ grinned. "You haven't eaten any of your peas or sweetcorn," she said, "I think someone's a bit too excited."

"Yeah, come on, Gracie, they're just jackets," Henry said, "what's so special about them?"

Grace's jaw dropped. "Have you seen them? They are more pretty than our soccer jackets."

Jack sighed. "God, Gracie, you're such a girl!"

"I am a girl," Grace replied, "what's your excuse?"

"I'm a boy," Jack answered, "and I'm older than you. Can you please stop going on about your jacket? That's boring!"

Grace frowned. "Your boy stuff makes me bored and there's 6 boys in this house. Mommy and me are always doing boy stuff with you."

"You can live with it," Jack said, rolling his eyes.

"And you can live with this!" Grace answered.

Hotch smirked. "I think I know where she got her debate skills from," he said, "hey, Plum, you'd be great as a media liaison."

"That was Mommy's old job," she said, "right?"

JJ nodded. "It was."

"And she was the best media liaison ever," Hotch said.

"I'm going to climb across that table and smother you if you don't quit," JJ smirked, absolutely into him.

Grace and Benjamin grimaced. "Ew!"

"They're going to do it on the table!" Henry muttered, "oh my God."

"We're not doing it on the table," JJ said, "don't be silly. You all need to know that mommies and daddies share a special love that isn't as gross as you think."

Jack held an uneasy face as he looked between his parents. "We're eating dinner."

"I know we are, and that's why this topic is shutting down," JJ said, "come on, let's go get dessert."

* * *

"Are you sure you want to find out today?" Kayla asked, covering JJ's belly with gel.

JJ and Hotch nodded. "We're moving in a few days and we're still painting...so it would help a bit if we had everything done before they arrive."

Today was the day that JJ and Hotch would finally find out the gender of the twins. There wasn't a particular gender in favour, though it was easy to tell that Grace especially wanted girls. The boys didn't have a preference. They weren't as interested in the pregnancy as Grace was, which was understandable.

Grace had begged for weeks to go with her parents to this appointment. She wanted to know what was going on inside her mother's body, and she wanted to get closer with her mom. Both were very understandable, as she was the only girl in the family and this was something that happened to women.

"You can clearly see both babies right here," Kayla said, moving the wand over JJ's stomach. "Baby B looks squished up against your ribs...you probably have a bit of difficulty breathing, right?"

JJ nodded, "yeah...it's gotten worse. It's a struggle walking up the stairs."

"This is totally normal. B is pushing against your diaphragm, causing you to have difficulty breathing. You won't absolutely suffocate, though," she laughed, "and this is about the worst you'll get."

"Can I have 2 sisters?" Grace blurted out.

Kayla smiled at the girl and continued moving the wand over JJ's stomach.

"I have the sex of the babies right here, if you want me to show you." She said.

"Yeah!" Grace yelled.

JJ and Hotch laughed a little. "Sure," JJ said, "I think Grace is more anxious than any of us."

Turning the monitor, Kayla pointed to the figures. "You have 2 little boys in there," she said.

Grace shook her head. "No! It's 2 girls! I want sisters!"

"Gracie," Hotch began, as he pulled her in closely. "It's 2 boys...we can't change that."

"Uh, 7 boys," JJ said with wide eyes, "we're going to have 7 boys."

Kayla wiped the gel off of JJ's belly and put her gloves and wand away. "I'll leave you in here for a minute while I get the papers."

JJ gave her a sincere smile and watched her leave.

"I don't like boys," Grace moaned, poking at JJ's belly, "they're bad! Tell them they're bad!"

"Grace, mommy is having 2 boys. We can't change that. Please don't act up like this," Hotch said, "you know what we told you before we came. You can't cry over this, okay?"

The girl looked at her mother and started crying.

JJ sighed as she sat up. "Grace," she said sternly, "please don't-"

"Why can't I get sisters?" She cried, "why can't Isabel still be alive? I just want a sister!"

Hotch bit his lip. "Grace, come here," he said, "don't start this now."

"The boys always get what they want!" She shouted, falling into her father's arms. "I don't want to be the only girl! I want a sister!"

The room went quiet for a moment. Nobody knew what to say. After a minute, JJ finally worked up the courage to say something.

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

* * *

"Would you quit crying?" JJ yelled to her daughter angrily. "I can't change what I'm having!"

"You're so mean!" Grace cried, trying to hit her mother. "I don't want those babies!"

Anger tore through JJ as she grabbed the girl's wrists and held them tightly.

"Well, I do want those babies, Grace. You need to stop acting like this or I'll take you to a doctor, because you're not supposed to act out like this," JJ said, sternly.

"You're just mad because you wanted girls, too," Grace snapped, "but now you only have me and you hate me so you have no girls left!"

JJ sighed. She couldn't stay calm anymore. This was it. She didn't want to think of bad things, like hitting the girl, or dragging her somewhere, but the thoughts kept coming to her.

"If you don't leave this room right now, I'll make sure you never dance again. I will cancel your classes."

"You're not the boss of me!" Grace yelled, throwing her foot to the ground.

JJ's nostrils flared. "You wanna bet?" She retorted.

"You can't do anything to me without daddy's help," Grace said, "and daddy won't let you hit me."

"Stop it. Now!" JJ shouted.

Grace was furious. "I hate you and those babies so much!" She screamed, kicking and punching at her mother with considerable force. "I wish you never got them inside of you ever!"

"Ok, Grace, say what you want," JJ said, once again, grabbing the girl's clenched fists, "but you can't hit me and get away with it. I am your mother and kids don't hit their mothers."

"But I hate you so I can!" The 5 year old yelled, kicking JJ hard in the thigh.

JJ pushed Grace back onto the couch. She knew there was going to be a huge bruise, and it was going to hurt like hell for days.

"You hurt mommy," JJ said, angrily, "you're not allowed to hurt anyone!"

"I don't love you anymore!" Grace screamed, digging her nails into JJ's arm.

"You think by hurting me that I won't have these babies? You think that will help you get your way? Forget it, Gracelyn. It's not happening!"

Grace screamed, kicking JJ's shins. "I play soccer, I can hurt you!" She threatened.

"I got a scholarship from playing soccer, I could hurt you even worse," JJ shot back, holding her daughter against the couch so that she couldn't kick or punch. "But I'm not going to because you're my daughter."

"I'm never leaving you two in the house alone again," Hotch said, running into the living room. "What the hell is going on in here?"

Grace got loose from JJ's hold and ran over to her father. "Mommy's being mean to me!" She yelled.

"Aaron, please take her away from me. I don't want to look at her," JJ said, softly, making her way to the stairs.

"Grace-Gracelyn!" Hotch raised his voice, grabbing the girl to hold her still, causing her to become frightened. "You never EVER hurt mommy, especially when she's pregnant, you hear me? You've just caused her a lot of pain, and I don't think she's going to forgive you for a long time."

Grace bit her tongue to stop herself from saying anything more.

"Me and you are going to have a long chat tonight. You need to accept the fact that you're getting two brothers. It's not going to change. Nobody can change it."

"You're always on her side!" Grace yelled.

Hotch held the girl against him. "I know you're upset because you want girls, but believe me, this doesn't change anything. All you've done is make mommy upset, and now she doesn't want to talk to you. You need to say sorry to her. You're old enough to know what sorry means. Don't go now, but after I talk to you tonight, we're going to go and tell her sorry."

"I don't even want more kids in this family," she said in a quiet voice, "you have too many, and you're forgetting about everyone else."

"That's not true. I'm not happy with you, Gracelyn. I can't believe you hurt her. I didn't expect that from you," Hotch said, "and now you have to figure out how to say sorry to her."

Grace looked down. "I didn't mean to," she said, "I just want a sister."

"I know you do, but hurting mommy doesn't make a sister. It makes things worse. We need to go and get you calmed down, don't we? I'm sure your levels are everywhere. You can't do this anymore."

"Can you tell her sorry? I don't like her and she doesn't like me."

"Only you can," Hotch said, taking her to the kitchen, "she's very, very upset."

* * *

"Boys?!" Henry asked, excitedly, looking around at his brothers.

JJ and Hotch grinned. "Boys."

"Isn't that like...7 boys?" Jack asked, "because that's awesome!"

"Where's Grace? She wanted to know," Tyler pointed out, "she can't miss this."

Hotch looked at JJ and then back at the kids. "She's a bit...upset because she wanted sisters...but, brothers are awesome, right?"

"I don't think she would like having sisters," Jack said, "She wouldn't like missing out on the attention."

"That's a valid point, my man," Hotch said, "you need to tell her that."

JJ looked at her boys and smiled proudly, leaning on her husband. "7 boys?" She laughed, looking up at him.

"7 boys," he swallowed thickly, putting his arm around her. "And they're all ours."

* * *

"I think that's the last box," Hotch said, looking around at the box-filled ground floor of the new house.

"I wish I could've helped you," JJ frowned, wrapping her arms around her husband.

Hotch turned around and gave her a look. "You're not serious," he said, playfully poking at her bump. "You're bringing our little boys into the world and you want to help me? JJ, you've got to slow down."

"No, I am not slowing down," JJ said, putting her hands on her back. "I don't care how badly my back aches, I will not slow down."

"Jennifer," Hotch laughed, "you're doing too much. You're going to end up tiring yourself out, and you know that will cause stress on the boys, and next thing you know, you'll go into early labor."

JJ laughed. "I didn't know you were a doctor," she said.

He smiled as he looked into her eyes. "I did research because I want to be ready when you can't get out of bed. I want to be ready to help you down the stairs every day. I want to be ready to...to show you I love you, that I care."

"You do beyond that," JJ said, "and you've done so much already."

"I'll say it again," Hotch began, "you're giving me 2 more sons. You can't expect me to just sit back and let you struggle with everyday tasks."

JJ smirked, attempting to look past her belly. "I can't put my shoes and socks on anymore," she said, smiling, "and that's the only thing I need your help with. I can manage everything else on my own."

"You're 19 weeks pregnant, babe," Hotch breathed, "I just don't want you to be afraid to come to me when you need things. I know we've been through this before, but every pregnancy is different...and I don't want you to put all this on yourself."

"I'm not," JJ said, "I know how much I can handle...and I'll let you know when I want to slow down."

Hotch gave JJ a sincere smile as he flattened his lips. "As long as you do," he said.

* * *

Hearing the soft footsteps of his wife, Hotch turned around. JJ was standing in front of him, holding her belly.

"Morning beautiful," he said, kissing her forehead, "how did you sleep?"

"Terribly," JJ groaned, "these two were wide awake all night, and just when they stopped moving around, I was trying to get to sleep, and I had to test Henry."

Hotch stroked her hair back off of her face. "Now will you let me take over for nights? As soon as the boys come, you won't get any sleep...and right now, you need it more than ever."

"You're right," JJ said, "but I'm not helpless...I'm pregnant. It's getting harder to move around, and sweeping floors and making beds isn't fun at all."

"You need to let me step in right now," Hotch said, "I'm gonna say this again; as soon as it gets hard, you stop. You just...stop. You need to tell yourself that you're a goddess...a beautiful goddess," he smiled.

JJ pursed her lips. "Where exactly are you going with this?" She asked.

"I'm trying to say that...you're a goddess. You deserve to rest, and feel beautiful, and know that you have a huge support system ready when you need it," he smiled at JJ, making her look down and grin. "In fact, I don't think you remember asking Spencer and Penelope over later, do you?"

"Is that today?" JJ asked, eyes wide. "We need to clean up and get the kids dressed!"

Hotch stopped JJ from moving and looked her in the eyes. "Relax...they're coming over to help us out. Spencer can't wait to help us unpack, and Penelope can't wait to be with the kids. We're gonna be fine."

"We better be, or I'll kick your ass," she smirked.

* * *

"Nostalgia," JJ remarked, rummaging through the kids' boxes. "It gets to the best of us."

"I found that picture of the triplets from last year," Hotch laughed, passing Reid the frame, "that one that makes you laugh so much. Look at them," he said.

Reid laughed as he examined the picture of his God-daughter, with her arms around her brothers, all shirtless. "This will forever be my favourite of them," he said.

"What's this?" He then asked, pulling a tape out of the box. He blew the dust off of it and held it up, trying to make out what it read.

'Jenny's Goal, 1989'

"That's one of the only things I have left of Rosaline," JJ said, "she filmed it. I'll never forget the moment she yelled, 'Jenny, you better get this goal, or I'll turn the camera off!' It makes me laugh every time."

Reid smiled sincerely as he placed it into it's own box.

"She died the week after," JJ continued, "and the day after I found her...I...I kept re-watching it, over and over again...just to hear her voice. I needed to hear that last 'Jenny'...because I knew that one day, I would forget," she flattened her lips, stopping herself from tearing up. "And I don't want to forget the one person who made me feel like I mattered...you know?"

"Jen, I found your sonograms," Hotch said, opening an envelope full of black and white images.

JJ smiled, pouring them out onto the ground.

"Who are these?" Reid asked, picking up a picture.

"That was Ben and Tyler...and I don't know if you can see or not, but Grace is actually squished under Tyler. They're still like that."

Reid and Hotch laughed. "They had their own little play place inside of you," Hotch said, "and I remember you used to make me watch your belly moving as they pushed around. I got so freaked out when you told me there was a foot sticking out near your belly button."

"This was taken the day Grace was diagnosed," Reid said, holding up a picture of himself holding 6 month old Grace. "I remember this day so clearly," he said, "I just remember you calling me in tears, attempting to explain that she had lost all this weight...and that I was right."

"Are you kidding?" Hotch exclaimed. "You saved her life. We wouldn't have known any different. We were still trying to get used to the idea of having triplets...and we were so happy to have a little girl...and then this happened. We had literally just gotten Ben and Tyler to sleep, and Grace was unresponsive, so we immediately freaked out and took all the kids to the hospital. We were so clueless," he said.

JJ took the picture from Reid and smiled. "I think this can go up in the hallway upstairs, right beside Henry's diagnosis day."

"Look at their individual pictures," Hotch remarked, pulling out photos of their children. "I loved this shoot so much."

"They're growing up so fast," JJ said, rubbing her belly to soothe the kicking babies. "I just want all this to last forever."

* * *

**Review! :)**


	11. Chapter 11

**Here's chapter 11! I had a bit of fun writing this one, so I hope you enjoy it!**

* * *

The sunlight shone through the window as Hotch opened his eyes. The light cream walls were even lighter as the sun bounced off of them. He rubbed his eyes and looked around at the bedroom.

"Sleep okay?"

He turned over and looked at his wife. "Yeah...you?"

"No, not really," she said, sitting up.

"At least your anxiety levels have lowered," he said, "it's amazing what a week can do."

JJ smiled as she looked at her husband. "I'm excited," she said.

"For what?"

"This," she grinned, "just...everything. I'm excited to grow our family, spend the rest of my life with you...I'm happy, and I know that it makes you happy."

Hotch rested his head on JJ's right shoulder and put his arm up to her head to stroke her hair. "I'm excited, too," he said, "for all of this."

Then, he felt his wife jump a little.

"Oh my God, babe," she said excitedly, "they're awake!"

Hotch sat up and put is hand on JJ's belly. Sure enough, he could feel movement...and he hadn't been happier.

"How does that feel?" He asked.

"It feels amazing," JJ said, smiling.

"This is the happiest I've seen you in a long time," Hotch said, kissing JJ on the lips. "And I'm so proud of you...Jen, look how far you've come. You've gotten through so much...and look what it's rewarded you."

JJ bit her lip, smiling. "Us," she said softly, "you put up with my crying...all those bad nights...it's rewarded us. It's shown us that we can do this as a team...Aaron, I'm proud of myself."

"You're so beautiful," Hotch said, kissing her, "and I love you so much, you're my JJ...and I will always be proud of my JJ."

* * *

"We need 2 beds for the babies," Benjamin said, holding his dad's hand tightly, "but they can sleep with me, too!"

JJ laughed, holding Tyler's hand tightly as they walked through the baby section. They had chosen to take Ben and Tyler because they wanted to spend more time with them and make a day out of it. JJ and Grace's relationship had certainly hit rocks, and though it was just a small spat, it had clearly changed how Grace and JJ saw each other.

"We're going to have both babies in our bed," JJ said, "because we need them close, and when they get bigger, they will go into their own bedroom, in their own cots."

"What will they eat?" Ben asked.

JJ moved both boys in front of her as she moved along the aisle. "They don't have any teeth, so they drink milk and get their food," she said.

"We should look at these," Hotch said, playing with one of the baby toys on the shelf. "Hey, Jen, aren't these cool?"

JJ laughed. "These are so neat! Look at them!"

"We should buy this for mommy only," Benjamin giggled, watching as an intrigued JJ played with the infant's toy.

"They're mobiles...sort of like the ones you guys had as babies," Hotch said, grabbing his boys' hands. "How about we look at clothes?"

Tyler groaned, "you said we weren't getting clothes this time!"

"Yeah!" Ben followed, "you lied!"

"Relax," JJ said, "Jack and Henry came when we needed clothes for you guys. They hated going through girls clothes for Grace, too. At least you guys get to look through boys clothes."

Hotch took JJ's hand and kissed her on the cheek as they went down the aisle. "It's gonna be a long day," he said.

* * *

"Can we wear our own clothes to school ever?" Grace asked, pulling her hair out of her ponytail.

"From what I know," Garcia began, "you all have uniforms."

"They're not very pretty," Grace stomped her foot.

Penelope took the child and sat her down on the floor of the new living room. She began to braid her hair, just like Grace enjoyed.

"Uniforms are probably the only thing your parents like about your school," she chuckled. "It's not easy having a lot of children to get ready in the morning, and this way, everyone wears the same thing, and nobody has to worry about how they look!"

"They're ugly," Grace said, bluntly.

"I wouldn't say tha-"

"Ugly."

Garcia tied Grace's hair off and put it on her back. "You won't be getting your uniform until later this month," she said, "don't worry, I'll put some rhinestones on it and bedazzle it."

"Do you have any sisters?" Grace asked suddenly.

"I don't, why?"

The girl frowned as she stood up. "Everyone else gets to have a sister, why not me?" She asked, dragging herself to the kitchen.

"Aw, my mini JJ, is this about the new babies?" Garcia asked.

Grace nodded, her bottom lip sticking out.

"Listen," Penelope said, taking her God-daughter by the hand. "I know you don't want anymore brothers...believe me, I understand, you have 5! And pretty soon, you'll have 7, and you're gonna have days where you just wanna sit with mommy, I get it, and that's okay."

"I don't like mommy," Grace said, "she's mean."

Garcia's face fell as she pulled the girl onto her lap. "Why is mommy mean? Mommy's nice."

"No she's not! She shouted at me when I said I didn't want brothers! She doesn't understand!"

Penelope hugged Grace tightly. "Mommy and daddy are going through a lot of stress right now, okay? They're not mad at you, I promise. It's okay to want sisters, Angelface, I know I did. I had 4 brothers, and all I wanted was a sister-"

"I almost had 2," Grace said, burying her face into her godmother's chest.

"Shhh, munchkin, it's okay," Garcia soothed, "I know you want sisters, I know," she said softly, "but I want you to remember that even if you never get sisters that are alive, you still have lots of brothers that love you, and your mommy loves you, even if you don't think she does."

Grace started crying into Garcia's chest. "I just want a sister," she said as quietly as she could.

"I know you do, Gracie, I know you do," was all her God-mother could say.

* * *

"Ben!" Hotch raised his voice, "Tyler!"

"This is why we don't let them leave our sight," JJ hissed, looking down the aisle she was in. "I can hear them."

Hotch got closer to where he could hear the children. When he finally turned the corner to the toy aisle, he spotted them.

"Boys! Get back here right now!" He shouted.

"Never let their hands go," JJ said, quite obviously fearful for her children. At 5 years old, the world was their play place. They were eager to explore everything. That worried JJ immensely.

"You don't walk off without telling us first," Hotch said to his sons, "what if somebody takes you and we don't see that? We want you to be safe."

JJ pushed the cart along until she got to the blankets. "We're buying blankets," she demanded. "I want the green, no...the blue...or would the cream look nice with the bedding?"

"Their bedding is cream, so just get them a light coloured blanket...maybe the light orange?" Hotch said.

"Orange is the colour of fire," Tyler pointed out. "I know because I saw a fire when we drived here."

JJ laughed. "Drove, buddy, when we drove here."

"Can we get this blue blankie?" Benjamin asked, playing with the fuzzy fabric.

"If you want to," JJ said, "it would go very nicely with the bedding."

Hotch lifted Tyler so he could reach the top shelf. "I found one!" He exclaimed, pulling it out from the shelf. "Look! It's the colour of my shorts!"

"That's right, navy blue!" JJ said, high fiving him as he handed her the blanket.

"Your brothers are going to love these," Hotch said. "What else should we get, do you think?"

Ben and Tyler looked at each other and almost immediately took off for the toy aisle.

"If I ever start a blog," JJ muttered to her husband, "the first post would be 'Why Raising a Quarter Dozen Five Year Olds Is Not a Good Idea', no doubt."

* * *

"What makes you sad?"

Hotch put down the kitchen knife and carrot when he heard his son's voice. He turned around to see Benjamin holding his favourite plush crocodile.

"Uh, I don't know, buddy, what do you think makes me sad?" He answered, pulling the child up onto the counter.

"Mommy."

Swallowing thickly, the man looked into his son's eyes.

"What about mommy?"

"When she cries," he said quietly, "when she stays in bed because she's scared."

Hotch's face fell. Was it that obvious? Sure, it was the visible symptoms of depression and anxiety, but to a 5 year old, it was just confusing. Waking up was always different. What if he wanted to go to the park but his mommy was too sad to get out of bed? What if he just wanted to cuddle with her after a nightmare but she couldn't speak because she was crying so hard?

"That's her anxiety. You know mommy has anxiety, and it's not something you need to understand at the moment," Hotch said.

Ben sighed. "But I want to know about it. What is it?"

"Okay," Hotch gave in quickly, "you know how when you get up to get a drink at night and it's dark? Well, you might not be afraid of that dark, but mommy might be. Even if there's a light on, she won't go because her head is telling her 'no'. Do you get that?"

"Is Grace sad too?"

Hotch shook his head lightly. "No, no, Grace is just afraid of the dark. The same as Luke. But mommy has really bad nightmares about the dark."

"Why does it make you sad?" Ben asked, focused entirely on the backyard through the kitchen window.

The father stroked his son's hair over his head and kissed it. "It makes me sad because...it's not her fault. She didn't wake up this morning and say, 'I'm going to stay in bed all day and cry', did she? She didn't choose this, yet she still has to suffer. That's what makes me sad."

"Can she get all better again? I miss her," the child whispered.

"I know you do...I miss her too...a lot. But it's not her fault, alright? When mommy's having a bad day like today...you...tell her everything will be okay. Ask her what she needs. Kiss and hug her and tell her she's beautiful...because, she doesn't always feel beautiful when she's sad...but she's your mommy, and my wife, and she's always beautiful."

Ben smiled as he wrapped his tiny arms around his father's neck. "You love mommy a lot, don't you?"

"I do," Hotch said, "I really, really do."

* * *

"Absolutely not," JJ scolded, closing Ben and Tyler's window. "The storm is horrible out there. You'll get floods."

The woman turned to leave, when all of a sudden, the lights went out. Knowing the cause, she sighed as she walked over to the closet. She pulled two flashlights from the top shelf and handed them to her sons.

"Don't waste these," she said, leading them to the stairs. "I'm gonna go get daddy, okay? I'll be back in a second."

"MOMMY!"

"Gracie, it's okay!" The mother shouted, "where are you?"

JJ listened for her daughter to call out, but she didn't. Instead, she could just hear her sobs over the rain hitting the roof of the house. She made her way down the hall until she found the source of the cries. In the corner of Luke's bedroom, there her 5 year old daughter was, curled up in a ball.

"Where's Luke?" JJ asked, blinking to adjust to the darkness. A faint light was coming from the glow-in-the-dark stars on Luke's wall.

"We were playing dollies downstairs," Grace said in a heavy cry.

"Mom? Dad?" Jack's voice came from his bedroom.

Hotch came out of the nursery with a flashlight and made sure everyone was safe. Knowing his daughter and 3 year old son were afraid of the dark, it was going to be a long night.

"We need flashlights," the man said, going to the linen closet in the hallway. He took out three flashlights and handed them to JJ, Jack, and Grace.

"My pump glows, mommy, I don't need a flashlight!" Henry exclaimed, showing his family the pump on his waist. The blue light wasn't nearly enough to be able to see, but it certainly made the boy feel more protected. He liked the light.

"Alright, let's get downstairs where there's room so we can start setting up beds," JJ said, "we need to get Henry and Grace sorted, and then we need to find food."

"This is gonna be awesome!" Jack exclaimed.

* * *

As JJ and Hotch rushed around, gathering Henry and Grace's supplies, the children sat around the living room. Grace and Tyler were playing a game on Grace's iPad, Luke, Jack, and Henry were playing on Jack's iPad, and Benjamin was playing on his iPad alone. Each child was content and settled, favourable for JJ and Hotch.

"Garcia said the storm will last at least a day and a bit," JJ said, "and Spence says the same. I just don't know what we'll do with the insulin. It needs to be room temperature. They're going to get too hot."

"You're right...maybe we can find a cooler. I think we've got one in the garage. I'll go look for it. Are you okay setting up beds until I come back?"

JJ smiled as she walked off. "Pregnant, not glass."

"Mommy, me and Henry are tired," Tyler announced, watching his mother go upstairs. He followed her and stood on the bottom step. "Can we sleep now?"

"It's dinner time, Bugsy, let's get you guys fed, and then get your beds ready. Do you wanna come help me?"

* * *

"Daddy, I'm bored," Grace said, tugging her lilac blanket along the dimly lit hallway. Her father stood before her in the kitchen, focusing on making sandwiches in the dark. He was normally a great cook, but in this light, he was beginning to question his chef abilities.

"Plum, dinner will be ready in a few minutes. Do you have Little Einsteins on there?"

Grace nodded, biting her lip. "Can we all watch it?"

"I don't think Henry and Jack would like Little Einsteins. They did when they were younger, but I think that you, Luke, Ben, and Tyler might like it."

"What are you going to watch?" She asked.

Hotch put the last of the finished sandwiches onto plates. "The older boys have their own TV episodes. So do mommy and I. Good thing we got them, huh, princess?"

"Yeah! We can have a light-out everyday!"

"Maybe," Hotch laughed.

* * *

Feeling the tickling sensation on her arm, JJ laughed. "What's that?"

"It's Stanley," her 5 year old daughter answered, giggling.

"Guess what Stanley is!" Tyler exclaimed.

JJ's heart rate sped up for a second. At this rate, 'Stanley' could be anything. Her triplets were very imaginative and were always playing jokes.

"How about you guys tell me what 'Stanley' is," JJ said.

"It's a spider!" Grace announced, beaming proudly.

Her mother screamed, which let Grace know that she was uncomfortable.

"Get it off of me!" She shrieked, jumping up out of her chair.

"Stanley likes you," Grace pouted, "can we keep him?"

JJ's eyes widened as she watched her child take the spider off of her. "It's a spider, Grace, absolutely not. Aaron!"

"JJ? You okay?" Hotch yelled from the bathroom.

"When you get out here, can you come and get this spider?" She said.

Tyler giggled. "Ha! Mommy's afraid of spiders!" He chanted. Grace soon joined in until JJ silenced them.

"I'm doing Henry's urine ketone test," Hotch reported, "I'll be out in a bit."

"Get it away from me!" JJ shrieked, "put it outside!"

Grace frowned, placing the spider into her brother's hand. "His name is Stanley and I'm going to marry him."

JJ gulped. Did her daughter just-

"Stanley is smaller than us so he gets to sleep in a crib," Tyler announced, letting the spider crawl around his palm.

"No, it goes outside," JJ said, her voice getting louder. "Put him outside and get ready for bed. Go and get your PJ's on."

* * *

"Tell mom your number," Hotch smiled to his son as he shone the flashlight over the counters to clean up the ketone strips.

"It was only 32!" Henry beamed, squeezing his eyes shut as JJ ran her hands through his hair.

Putting the strips away in their box, Hotch sighed. Him and JJ had both just watched their 8 year old run off, and this was just about the only quiet time they would get for a while.

"It's almost 7:30," Hotch said, folding the washcloth that usually sat on the counter. "What should we do with them? I know tomorrow will be busy if the power is still out."

"Should we just tire them out tonight and sleep all day tomorrow?" JJ laughed.

The man grinned. "That sounds like a brilliant idea, I can't wait to do it with you," he said in between kisses.

Their moment was cut short when they heard a noise all too familiar.

"Whose pump?" JJ muttered, walking out of the bathroom. She heard one of her children running down the stairs, and the pump's beeping noise became louder.

JJ and Hotch's 5 year old daughter was standing in the doorway, trying to catch her breath. She had nothing but PJ bottoms on.

"Mommy! It's beeping!" Grace whined, throwing herself at JJ.

The mother took one look at her daughter and dropped down to her level. The beeping noise certainly scared the young child. She'd only heard it a few times in her life.

"Am I dying?" She asked suddenly, just as JJ managed to find out why the pump had started beeping in the first place.

"No, Plum, you're not," JJ smiled, "your insulin levels are very high."

Hotch's eyebrows furrowed. "Did you not eat your dinner like I said you had to?"

Grace shook her head. "I gived it to Stanley because he was hungry and I didn't want his pump to beep like mine."

"So that's why your pump's beeping, huh?" JJ asked, "you need dinner."

"Momma, is Stanley gonna die of diabetes?" Grace asked innocently, catching her mother's hand as they made their way to the kitchen.

JJ smiled lightly and shook her head, aiming the flashlight ahead of them. "Grace, Stanley doesn't have diabetes, and he most certainly doesn't have a pump, either."

Grace frowned. "I just wanted him to be like me."

"He is like you," JJ said, "he's energetic, he's...a goof...and he is very...erm..cute," she finished with a slight grimace. She hated spiders more than anything, but her daughter's satisfaction meant much more than that.

"Can we get a dog?" The girl continued, watching as her mother put together a quick carb meal.

JJ's eyebrows shot up as she looked down at her daughter. "Why do you want a dog?"

Taking an orange juice out of the cool box, Grace shrugged. "Henry said there's dogs for diabetes, and I think that's cool."

"Dogs for diabetes, huh? You might have to ask daddy about that one. I don't do well with dogs, you know that." JJ said, measuring the carbs on the meal she had put together.

"It would be so cool to have a dog," Grace admitted, taking the sandwich and crackers from JJ. "Don't you think?"

JJ shrugged. "It would be, but dogs are expensive. A lot goes into caring for a pet, and I don't know if our family is ready for an animal."

"Daddy would have said yes," Grace mumbled.

"Uh, no, he wouldn't have," JJ mumbled back. "C'mon, let's finish getting you changed. You're not lounging around shirtless, are you?"

Grace moaned, putting her plate on the table. "But the boys get to take their shirts off!"

"Oh, Grace, you make me laugh."

* * *

**I hope you liked that chapter! I'm looking forward to producing tons more scenes for everyone! xo**


	12. Chapter 12

**I'm back with another chapter of The Sugarless Plum! Sorry for not updating, I've been busy and had no inspiration! Anyway, enjoy! **

* * *

"Tyler's sick," Hotch said, coming out of his son's bedroom.

"How bad?" JJ half-grimaced.

The man ran his hand through his hair. "Throwing up," he said, not showing much expression on his face.

"So, do where do we put Ben for the while?"

Hotch bit his lip. "Grace would gladly let him into her room, but-"

"But Ben likes the quiet," JJ said.

"How about he goes in with Jack or Henry?" Hotch offered. "Luke's young still, and he needs his playtime in his bed-"

JJ nodded. "And Ben won't get a good night's sleep if he has to wake up every 4 hours when we test Henry, so I guess that leaves Jack."

Hotch sighed. "Right, well, we better go down and start breakfast. I can hear Luke talking to himself," he smiled.

* * *

Falling onto the couch, JJ let out a deep sigh. It was 3am and the lump in her throat had only risen higher, and it was causing her to choke. Tears were streaming down her cheeks, then dissolving into her lap. She was coughing, but not loudly. Not loud enough to wake anybody. She'd wind up in a hospital if anyone were to see her like this.

Her eyes clouded over as she looked down. She could see the ever-so-slight scars on her arms, the ones she made when she was just a teenager. On the 5th anniversary of her sister's suicide, JJ could no longer take the constant pain...so she did exactly what her sister did. She didn't forgive herself after that. Jennifer's body was shaking and she was trying so hard to pull herself together.

But she couldn't.

"Thought I heard you down here."

JJ looked up to see her husband. She bit her lip and smiled slightly, tucking a stray hair behind her right ear.

"Wh...why are you d..down here?" She half-stammered.

"Grace's a bit low, just getting her glucose tablets...and you? What are you...doing down here?"

JJ shrugged. "I couldn't sleep..." She lied, "I just figured I'd try resting down here for a bit."

Hotch nodded, almost completely missing the look in her eyes. "Okay...but, you seem a bit...off," he said, "is everything okay? Do you need me?"

"No...no," JJ smiled, watching him go up the stairs. "I just need to rest."

But that wasn't the truth.

"A..are you sure? I..."

Hotch was cut off by his wife's sudden breakdown.

"I need you," she cried, burying her face into her hands.

The man swallowed thickly, looking at the pack of glucose tablets in his left hand. "I'll be right back, okay? Just...stay here."

JJ squeezed her eyes shut and tried getting the rest of the tears out. Wasn't a mother supposed to be happy? Wasn't she supposed to be okay?

* * *

A few long minutes later, Aaron Hotchner appeared at the bottom of the staircase, holding a blanket and JJ's antidepressants.

"You don't have to," JJ mumbled, looking down.

"I want to," Hotch swallowed, sitting down beside her.

He moved her light frame gently onto his lap and stroked her hair back. "Have you taken your pills?" He asked, pulling her head onto his chest.

JJ shook her head. She didn't want to take any pills, but she knew deep down that she had to. She had to do this for her husband, for her kids, for herself. Sighing, she leaned over and gestured he open the bottle.

Hotch poured two small pink oval pills onto his right hand and moved them towards JJ. She shakily took them out of his hand and put them into her mouth, looking him in the eye. He nodded slightly and handed her the glass of water that had been sitting on the coffee table. She swallowed the pills down and washed her mouth out.

After JJ had finished, Aaron laid back on the couch with JJ on top of him. He secured a blanket around them and put his arms around his wife.

"Why are you down here?" He asked quietly.

JJ shrugged, resting her head on his chest. "I don't know how much longer I..."

"I get it, we're stressed," Hotch started, uneasy of what he should say, "I understand-"

"But you don't understand," JJ half whispered, "you don't understand how hard it is to wake up everyday, knowing that you have depression. You don't understand how hard it is to deal with anxiety...I mean, how am I supposed to take care of two babies inside of me when I can barely take care of myself?"

Hotch shook his head. "No, JJ, please...please don't...don't say that. You're brilliant. You're...you're strong, and...and you're beautiful, and you...you make every day worth living."

JJ started sulking as Hotch pushed her bangs back.

"Hey, hey, beautiful, no tears...not today," he whispered against her ear, "it's going to be okay."

He was sure his wife didn't hear him, as she kept on crying into his chest. He sat her up on his lap and looked at her teary red eyes. He could feel his heart breaking as he studied her face. It was stained red with tears, and she was beginning to look like an entirely different person.

Before she could move, Hotch cupped her damp cheeks and moved closer to her.

"You are so brave...and so quiet," he whispered, searching her glistening eyes, "that sometimes...I forget you're s..suffering."

"I want to end this suffering," JJ said, biting her lip, "for good."

Hotch could swear his heart stopped beating.

"No...no...you're gonna get through this," he said, "depression...and...and anxiety, they don't drag you down...no, it's how you deal with it...that's what drags you down. Listen, JJ, I am not letting you give up."

"I'm so sorry," JJ whispered through her tears, "I am not the same person you married," she sobbed, "I've changed...and...one day, this is going to get to be too much for you. I'll explode...I'll give up...I'll hurt myself again, and you won't be able to stop me...because you'll have given up on me."

Aaron Hotchner couldn't believe what he was hearing. "Listen to me, Jennifer Jareau, I am never, ever giving up on you. You are worth something...you are worth fighting for. I don't care if it takes 10 months for you to get better, or 10 years...I will be right here, right beside you. I will be here, and I swear to God, Jen, I mean it."

"Everyone leaves," JJ said, "everyone just...leaves. One day, you're going to...you're gonna realise that I'm too complicated...and the medical bills will go up, and that's how you'll remember me...just a stack of...of medical bills. And we won't be ab..able to pay them off because...because I need so many drugs to keep me sane."

"But you're alive," Hotch said, grabbing her wrists, "let it cost a million dollars, I don't care," he said, looking down, "but you'll be alive."

And that's when he noticed it.

He closed his eyes tightly, but it didn't help. A few tears escaped and slid down his cheek.

"You...promised me...you...you," he stammered, "YOU PROMISED ME!"

"I told you," JJ said shakily, "I can't h...help myself."

Hotch swallowed thickly, running his hands over her wrists. "I could've helped you," he whispered, "but I didn't...and...now look."

"I'm so sorry," JJ cried.

Hotch wasn't supposed to cry. This was all of her fault. She had made her own husband cry and feel sorry for her. What type of selfish person was she?

"Please...JJ...just...just stop it, al...alright? Just...stop it." Hotch said, "please, just stop hurting yourself. I need you," he cried, "I need you to be safe, and...and happy...and healthy...and I need you to be alive."

"I'm trying," JJ sniffled, "believe me...I am trying."

"That's...that's all I need you to...do," Hotch said, "one day, you will wake up and not have to take a single pill to get you through the day...all because you tried."

JJ fell into her husband's arms and closed her eyes. At that moment, Hotch knew she had passed out from exhaustion, and needed to be taken to bed. He picked her light body up and took her upstairs, where he safely laid her in bed. He then crawled in beside her and took her body in his arms and cradled her. He rocked her back and fourth soothingly before placing a kiss on her forehead.

He could only cry. She wasn't going to give up. She was going to wake up and say "I made it" all because she tried.

And he was determined to be there with her, every step of the way.

* * *

"I would appreciate it if you didn't leave a mess everywhere you go, boys," JJ groaned, folding her older sons' jackets over the side of the chair.

"Mommy!" Ben rushed in, his wet feet soaking the carpet.

JJ sighed deeply. "What is it now?"

"Luke falled outside!"

As usual, JJ's heart began pounding. "I thought daddy was out there with you," she said, dropping the dish towel on the couch.

"He was," Ben said, "but he went around to get our toys and Luke wanted to go in the pool, but he falled in."

"No, no, no," JJ muttered, running out to where her husband had already leapt into action. She had heard an infinite number of stories about toddlers drowning in swimming pools, even while surrounded by adults and other family members. She always hoped and prayed that they would never be one of those families that appears in a news article about such tragedy.

"Grace and me screamed and Jack and Henry jumped in the pool and got him out!" Ben exclaimed, leading JJ to her son.

Luke was crying, and that worried JJ a lot.

"He's okay," Hotch said, picking his boy up, "just a little fall, nothing to worry about."

"A little fall?" JJ retorted, "he fell into the pool," she said, worriedly taking the child from her husband's arms.

Grace moved in between Hotch and JJ. "But he didn't go under the water because me and Tyler holded him up and Jack and Henry got him out," she said.

"You know what?" JJ smiled, "I'm glad he's...he's okay."

* * *

"You're supposed to test first."

Henry rolled his eyes as he spun around to his older brother.

"So? Why can't I be normal?"

Jack sighed. "Henry, there's no such thing as normal. Your pancreas...or whatever it is...stopped working, and now you need to wear an insulin pump to keep you alive."

Henry looked down at the device clipped on the waistband of his shorts. "I wish I didn't have to wear it."

"We all do," Jack said, "did you know it makes mommy cry? And even daddy sometimes has to make sure she gets her medicine or else she'll be sad, and Tyler is always reminding Gracie to take her insulin shots."

"I don't think she likes her pump very much," Henry admitted, "but mommy said it's best if she wears it because she dances so much."

Jack moved over to his brother and took the gummy worms out of his hands.

"You can't eat these," he said, "unless you tell mommy. I don't want you getting sick."

"I already am," Henry muttered.

Jack sighed for what felt like the hundredth time. "You're not sick. Just...one part of your body doesn't work. That's all."

Henry looked up, into his brother's hopeful eyes. "I don't want mommy to be sad, though. When mommy cries, she makes me cry."

"Then, I think you should not let diabetes bother you. God knows it's harder on her than anyone. With you and Grace, it's harder...and she just needs you to be healthy so that she can stop worrying so much. Can you please tell her what you're eating? I don't want you to get sick."

"Fine," Henry said.

* * *

"Aaron!" JJ laughed, hitting her husband playfully, "shut up!"

Smirking, Hotch added, "only if you'll-"

Upon noticing Jack walk into the kitchen, they both put straight faces on.

"Can you...uh, what's going on with you guys?" He asked, looking both parents in the eye.

JJ's eyes widened. "Just a little joke. What's up?"

"Uh, Grace wants you," Jack said, "I don't know why, she just keeps complaining. I told her to stop, but-"

Jack was cut off by JJ brushing past him. "Don't tell her to stop!"

Jack turned to his dad. "She was being annoying, why can't I tell her to stop?"

"Because, the last time this happened, she wasn't just complaining, Jack. She was having a hypo."

"What's that?" Jack asked.

Hotch patted the seat beside him and his son sat down.

"Since Grace's body can't produce insulin, she has a pump. And sometimes, her pump kinks and doesn't send all the insulin to her body. That makes her really sick. You should've ran straight down and told us she was complaining. Don't tell her to stop, because, sometimes, that's the only way she can tell you she's in trouble."

Jack's eyes widened as he looked at the ground. "So she could die?"

Hotch nodded, "yeah," he said.

JJ ran downstairs with Grace in her arms. Hotch immediately shot up and ran to the storage room.

"Oh my God," Jack muttered, watching his sister's pump be disconnected.

"I need a glucagon shot, she's not responding!" JJ demanded, pricking the 5 year old's finger. She very quickly held the blood up to the test strip and let the meter read the level.

Jack couldn't believe what was happening. He watched as his father rushed around the kitchen, finding all sorts of emergency hypo foods. He watched as his mother furiously worked at his sister's lethargic body.

"Her level is 49!" JJ shouted, half in disbelief. "I just tested her an hour ago and she was 97!"

"It's gotta be a kink in the pump. That's the third time this month," Hotch said, handing his wife the glucagon shot.

The glucagon shot is a shot designed for emergency low blood sugar correction. It quickly increases blood sugar levels in diabetics.

With no hesitation at all, JJ stuck the shot in her daughter's leg. Within a few seconds, she was awake, but crying hysterically.

JJ breathed a sigh of relief as she waited for Grace's levels to go back up.

"Log this," she half-gasped, leaning against the counter.

"Jack, I need you to get Grace's log book from her side table, okay?" Hotch instructed.

Watching his son run off, Hotch turned to JJ and Grace.

"She's okay," JJ gulped, "but not by much. This is ridiculous."

"I think we need to take her off of the pump, Jen, it's too much for her," he said, "she's always worrying about hitting it on a corner, or...or when she's doing flips, if she lands on it...I mean, with shots, she'll actually feel more normal."

JJ sighed, looking at her daughter. "We might have to," she said disappointedly, "I just...didn't think it would happen like this."

"Nobody does," Hotch said, picking up a towel and wiping Grace's sweaty forehead with it.

* * *

**What a twist, haha! Don't worry, everything that happened in this chapter was simply to move the story along. JJ still suffers, guys! I'm not going to just forget about it. And, yes, diabetes happens every single day of your life. It's going to happen in every chapter. **

**Also, for those wondering, hypos and hypers (low &amp; high blood sugars) occur mainly in younger children who have less control over their diabetes than older people. That's why Grace has more complications than Henry usually does. Don't worry, though, there will be more to come for them!**

**Anyway, I really hope you liked this chapter! PLEASE REVIEW! **


	13. Chapter 13

**Hello everyone! This is chapter 13 of The Sugarless Plum! The ending of this chapter really hit me emotionally, so if you cry easily, get the tissues ready. Also, a dear friend on Twitter (Kara / doctorsreid) asked if I would include Jade West from Victorious. Her and Reid are together for the story. I really hope you enjoy this chapter! **

* * *

Rubbing her belly, JJ smiled to herself. The past month had certainly done favours for her. She was 26 weeks pregnant, and she hadn't felt better in a long time. Whenever she sensed a panic attack coming, she managed to get it under control by going out for a walk around the neighbourhood. She cleared her mind, and got the exercise she needed.

"Mommy, it's time to do a needle!" Grace exclaimed, running into the kitchen with a bright, beaming face.

"Ready to do your needle?" JJ smiled, getting Grace's finger swabbed with an alcohol wipe.

The young girl nodded, quite excited to be working with her new routine. Her numbers were certainly better, and her attitude was most definitely more positive.

JJ pricked her daughter's finger and squeezed it until blood came out. Then, as routine, she put the test strip into the meter and put Grace's bloody finger up to the strip. The number was 97.

"You're having two jam sandwiches for lunch, so that's 2 units of insulin. Let mommy get that, okay?"

Grace nodded, dancing around the kitchen. Since switching to injections and pens, she had been much happier. For the month she had been back on them, her readings have been better, and her a1c was looking spectacular. They had high hopes that this would work well in the long term, too.

"Alright, we did your belly yesterday, so today lets do your thigh."

"Mommy, but it hurts!"

JJ gave her daughter a sad look. "I know it does, Plum, but it's all going to be worth it. This will only take a couple seconds, okay?"

Grace bit her lip as she gave her mother a slight nod.

Jennifer efficiently injected two units of insulin into her daughter's thigh. She knew it didn't hurt the girl as much as infusion site changes did, and she also knew that this was the change that had to happen.

"Okay, now eat your lunch. Ben and Luke will be down in a little bit. I'm going to change Henry's site. I'll be back down in a few minutes."

"Okay, mommy," Grace said politely, "thank you for doing my needle."

Grinning, JJ made her way upstairs. She knew it was worth it.

* * *

When the kids first heard that their uncle Spencer was bringing over his girlfriend Jade West, they didn't know what to think.

"Uncle Spencey has a real girlfriend?" Grace asked disbelievingly.

"Yes," JJ laughed, "and I've met her...she's very nice. I think you'll like her."

Jack snickered. "Does she wear glasses and bow ties and read loads of books like he does?"

JJ bit her lip to stop herself from laughing. "Jade's...not..like Spence, but they click. You will all like her. I promise."

The woman stopped cleaning the countertops when she heard a knock at the door.

"They're here!" Tyler yelled, racing to the door.

JJ caught up with him and opened the door, revealing Jade and Spencer.

"Spence," JJ smiled, pulling him into a warm hug as she usually does, "hi."

"Ok, this is very intimate," Jade said, nonchalantly, running her right hand through her hair, "you're too close."

JJ's eyes widened as she stepped back. "J...Jade," she smiled, pulling the girl in, much to her opposition, "how've you been?"

"My favourite pair of scissors is all scratched up after genius boy here decided it would be a bright idea to use them to stir sulphur and vinegar," she said, "how do you think I've been?"

JJ gave Jade a warm smile as she lead them through to the kitchen. The kids were eagerly waiting at the counter.

"You could have a cult," Jade remarked, looking at the children. She watched as Grace rushed past her and into her boyfriend's arms.

"Spencey!" She exclaimed, kissing him on the cheek.

Jade's eyes widened as she watched the 5 year old. "Oh, lovely, she's got energy."

"I have diabetes," Grace blurted out, looking into Jade's piercing green eyes.

"What kind?" Jade shot back, her left eyebrow darting up.

"Type 1 diabetes," she said proudly, burying her head into her godfather's neck.

Jade nodded. "Nice, I love dead organs."

JJ laughed as she moved around the counter. "This is Jack and Henry, and then we have our triplets, Tyler, Ben, and Grace, and our youngest is Luke."

"Mommy's having more babies, too," Tyler exclaimed, "she's having two boys."

"Yep, a cult," Jade smirked.

* * *

The afternoon had flown by, and soon it was dinner. Jade had certainly warmed up to the atmosphere.

"How do you keep up with all these kids?" She asked, jumping into the reclining chair.

JJ smiled as she placed Henry's food onto the scale. "Oh, you just do. It's not the easiest thing in the world," she said.

"Do you need me to test Henry and Grace?" Reid asked.

JJ let out a sigh. "Oh, Spence, you're a saviour," she said, "thank you so much."

"Is there anything you...want me to do? Do you weigh all of their food?" Jade asked, watching as Reid walked off to the supply room.

"You can go with him if you like," JJ said, "and...no, it's just for Henry and Grace...the whole...weighing-of-the-food thing...it's not easy, believe me. If I could flip a switch and reverse...this...I would, oh my God, I would." JJ said, calculating the amount of carbs in the meals.

Jade sat at the counter and played with her fingers. She watched JJ as she worked efficiently. It was easy to tell she had been doing it for a while.

"When were they...diagnosed?" Jade asked shyly.

"Grace was...about 7 weeks, I'd say," JJ said lightly, "and about 5 months later, when Henry was 3, he was diagnosed."

The younger woman's eyes widened a bit. She had heard of diabetes, but never seen anyone that has it. This was new for her. She was interested in diabetes, and though she had never admitted it, researching it was becoming a hobby.

"Do the kids have, like, injections...or...pumps?"

JJ looked up and smiled. "They were both on pumps until a month ago, when Grace became...unwell, so we switched her back to injections."

"She's a fighter," Jade smiled, "I assume you're proud of her."

"I am," JJ grinned, "she's...dealt with a lot...hold up," she said, "dinner!"

"Mom! Look at my number!" Henry exclaimed, rushing down the stairs.

JJ took a quick look at the meter and smiled. "Well done! That's a perfect blood sugar! Woo!" She high fived him and handed him his plate to take to the dining table.

"And...what about Grace?" Jade wondered, watching as the other children slowly made their way to their plates.

"I have to give her an injection. Spence should be back down to give Henry his bolus. Can you tell him it's 7 units?" She said before making her way upstairs.

On the inside, Jade felt a certain emotion when she was around Grace. The small girl looked worn out, and she knew that JJ noticed it. She knew the mother was trying her best to sort things out for her. She had taken quite a liking to Grace, not only because of her quirky and fun attitude, but because of the warmness she felt around her, the way she clung to her godfather's neck when they first walked in, and the way her head fits snugly in the crook of his neck. Grace had a certain thing about her, but Jade couldn't quite put her finger on it.

"Jade," Hotch smiled, coming inside from the backyard, "it's lovely to see you."

The young woman smiled. "It's lovely to see you, too."

"Has Reid been treating you well?" He smirked, putting the scale and carbohydrate book away.

Jade nodded, laughing. "Yes...you're not getting any information out of me...sir."

"Ah, it's Aaron," he laughed, handing her a plate, "and it's dinner."

JJ came downstairs a few moments later, with a sleeping Grace in her arms.

"Is her number alright?" Hotch asked.

JJ nodded, and woke Grace up and put her in the chair beside Jade. "Bubba, you gotta eat now, okay?" She said, "you can sleep later."

"Is...is she alright?" Jade wondered, watching the 5 year old play with her spaghetti.

"She's just tired," JJ said quietly, "last night wasn't a very good night."

"Oh...," Jade said, "if you need my help, I'll be right here."

The awkward small talk and silent stares soon turned into loud conversations and funny faces. Jack and Tyler were telling jokes, and Henry and Ben were busy laughing over something that happened the day before.

"Why did the scissors like running?" Jade asked the boys.

Both boys gave her a blank stare. Everyone was soon tuned in for the answer.

Jade couldn't help but grin. "Because he liked cutting to the chase!" She said.

Everyone started laughing. The children always found the little things funny. Jade felt happy on the inside. She looked so hard and scary on the outside, yet here she was, making children laugh and smile. Reid was right. She definitely liked this family.

* * *

When JJ and Hotch resorted to cleaning up, they left Jade and Reid to play with the children and keep them occupied before they set up the movie.

Each child was standing around Reid, telling him jokes, stories, and whatever else they could think of.

However, Grace was sleeping on Jade's lap. She had managed to nestle her head of long, strawberry-blonde hair into the crook of Jade's neck. She was exhausted, and Jade could feel the heat coming off of the girl. Grace's number was normal, and nothing could explain her tiredness.

"Is she okay?" Jade asked, gesturing to the girl in her arms.

"Yeah, something's going on...I'm taking her to her endocrinologist tomorrow, so hopefully, they give us some answers." JJ said.

Absentmindedly tucking Grace's hair behind her ear, Jade said, "I hope."

* * *

"I thought dinner would've given her energy to last the night," JJ half frowned, looking across the room to her daughter and Jade sitting together. Grace was asleep, curled up in Jade's arms.

"She stirred a few times...said something about a dog?"

JJ grinned. "Yeah...she..wants an alert dog for blood sugars," she said, "which reminds me, I need to test her-"

"Let me," Jade said, "if...that's okay."

"Of...of course," JJ smiled, quietly getting up, "hold on."

Jade looked down at the girl, who was fast asleep. Her forehead was red and rather sweaty, and she looked pale. She pulled the girl in close and cuddled her. She was so light and thin, and it looked like she hadn't eaten in days. Though, she was obviously fed enough, but her body couldn't take it. Jade felt sorry for Grace. It wasn't too often that a young, privileged girl had a chronic illness that basically destroyed her life.

"Here's her glucose meter," JJ said, coming back over, "and here is her little poker, and here are some test strips."

Jade gave JJ a sincere smile. "Thank you," she said, moving Grace off of her lap.

"The boys are playing with Reid," JJ laughed, "they're not going to sleep for a while."

Once Jade pricked Grace and inserted the blood into the meter, she read it.

"She's...wow...uh, 176," Jade said in disbelief.

JJ's eyes bulged as she sprang to her feet. "What the...no, she can't be," she exclaimed, "I just tested her an hour ago and she was in the 90's."

"I can give her a shot," Jade offered, "I know how to."

JJ bit her lip before nodding. She trusted Jade. She knew that the woman was capable of it. She also knew that Reid taught her how to administer insulin. JJ was confident in her.

She went off to get Grace's insulin shot ready. At the same time, Reid came out of the den carrying a sleeping Luke.

Jade looked up at him and smiled.

"How long has she been asleep?" Reid asked, adjusting the 3 year old in his arms.

"Since dinner," she said quietly, "and her level is high, JJ's just gone to get her shot ready."

Reid smiled. "So...how do you...like it?"

"I love the kids," Jade stated, "it would be nice to have them someday."

The man nodded shyly. "Yeah," he grinned, "it would be."

* * *

Once all the kids had been put to bed, Reid and Hotch got a call to go in for a case. After they left, JJ and Jade had some alone time.

"So, what's it...like," Jade asked shyly, "with Grace and Henry?"

JJ tucked a stray hair behind her ear. "Well, Henry...he's fine, his levels are always under control...but," she lightly shook her head, "Grace-"

"She's been through a hell of a lot," Jade remarked.

"Yeah," JJ settled, "it's just hard...watching her struggle, I mean, she's fighting for her life. Every single day, she's...taking insulin just to stay alive. I thank God for each and every morning she wakes up."

Jade nodded, "I don't really understand this, but-"

JJ stopped her. "The other day," she started, letting a tear run down her cheek, "she came to me saying, "mommy, I can't feel my foot", and I knew...I just..knew."

"Knew what?" Jade asked.

JJ smiled a little. "Oh," she said, "diabetics...they...they have an increased risk of neuropathy...where their body starts getting numb," she looked at Jade sadly, "and...if this continues, Grace...Grace won't be able to dance anymore."

"Oh my God...JJ," Jade whispered, "I didn't know it was this bad."

JJ shook her head. "And now...she's sleeping 20 hours a day. What am I supposed to do with her? She's confused, Jade, she's scared, and so am I. What will I do when she goes into first grade...with no feeling in her feet, sleeping too much, vision problems-"

"Ask her," Jade interrupted.

"She doesn't understand," JJ broke down, "for the love of God, neither do I!"

Jade looked sadly at JJ. "I cuddled with her earlier..and all she wanted to do was talk to me...but she kept on falling asleep. I think it would help you both if you...talked."

JJ nodded. "I'm so...tired of her being tired. I hate not understanding. I just want to help her. She's got absolutely no cure, she's just got life support. She will be so mentally tired even before her body gives out. It's gonna happen one day, and part of me just wants to cuddle with her and make the pain go away, but part of me just wants her suffering to end."

Jade didn't have any words. No snappy retort. Nothing. She turned to JJ and swallowed deeply.

"I'm witnessing my children die right before my eyes...and I'm not doing anything about it."

* * *

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter! PLEASE REVIEW! Opinions are ALWAYS welcomed! What do you think about Grace developing neuropathy? **

**P.S. I am not favouring Grace over Henry, I am simply making it realistic. An older child is less likely to develop complications with diabetes. Having said that, Grace is 5 years old. Her age is no excuse, but her weight is. She has the same issue as me. She is not able to gain weight properly, so the only body fat she is getting is from insulin. Her sugars are well controlled by JJ and Hotch, but they do tend to bounce. **

**Anyway, look out for the next chapter soon!**


	14. Chapter 14

**Hello! Here's a new chapter of The Sugarless Plum! I want to make a quick note that I will start focusing on Grace's new storyline. If you or someone you know has diabetic neuropathy, please help them and get treatment for them. There are far too many heartbreaking stories out there of people that have had amputations because of this horrible disease. The last part of this chapter is quite...erm...sensitive? In the sense of the reality of Grace's condition. When JJ is dealing with Grace, try to feel what she is feeling. She is scared and confused and doesn't know what to do. Grace is a 5 year old who is developing a disorder in her nerves and it's making her weaker and weaker every day. It is scary and confusing for the entire family. You'll see where I'm going with this. I really hope you like this chapter.**

**(Also, how cute is JJ's nickname for Grace?)**

* * *

"Bubba, look at me," JJ whispered to her daughter. "I want to see your face."

Grace turned around and gave JJ the most heartbreaking look she had seen in her life.

"What's wrong?" JJ asked, staring into the girl's tear-filled eyes.

"It hurts," the young girl cried, "momma, it hurts!"

JJ swallowed thickly, pulling herself together. "What hurts?" She demanded, pulling Grace away from the pillow.

"My foot! My foot, momma, it hurts!" Grace shrieked, grabbing onto it.

JJ picked up her daughter's soft foot in applied pressure every few inches.

"Can you feel that?" JJ asked.

Grace shook her head as she laid back down on the pillow.

"Grace," JJ said lightly, "if you can't feel-"

She looked over to see that her daughter had fallen back asleep. Just like that, she was losing her daughter one day at a time.

* * *

At 2pm, when JJ had finally gotten everyone out of the pool after spending a morning in it, she got to rest. She got to think about everything that was happening.

"Mommy, Tyler's crying," said Benjamin as he came out of their bedroom.

JJ sighed lightly as she got up off of the couch.

She walked into Ben and Tyler's room, only to find a very sunburnt 5 year old.

"Oh, Ty-Bug," JJ laughed, walking towards him, "I didn't even notice how burnt you were!"

"Mommy, it hurts so bad!" The boy cried, trying to walk.

"Let's go downstairs to get some cream, come on," JJ smiled, helping Tyler walk.

Once they got to the bottom of the stairs, JJ let go of Tyler and headed to the fridge, where the aloe Vera was stored.

"This is gonna hurt a little," she warned, opening the bottle, "so try not to scream, or you'll wake Luke."

Tyler's face made Benjamin burst out laughing as JJ applied the aloe Vera.

"This isn't funny!" Tyler moaned, "it's burning!"

JJ laughed as Tyler's expression changed. "You are a crazy young man."

When JJ finished lathering her son in the after-sun, she put it away. When she turned back around, she noticed that both Ben and Tyler had made their way over to their sleeping sister.

"Mommy, why is Grace always sleeping?" Ben inquired.

JJ swallowed. She didn't really know.

"She's...I don't know," she muttered, "but she'll be okay."

"But schools in 2 weeks," Ben said, "can she still go?"

JJ shrugged lightly. "I don't know," she said, "I'm taking her to her nurse later to find out."

"Is she dying?" Tyler asked innocently.

"Uh, no," JJ said, starting to get choked up, "no, she's fine, okay? Just...fine."

* * *

With Hotch away often, JJ felt like she was the only parent in the house. She didn't like feeling like that, because she knew Hotch couldn't change his hours. It was a thought that kept tapping at her head.

She fumbled around for the phone until she grabbed it. With Henry and Jack at their friends' houses, she only had to look after 4 children.

JJ pressed '1' and immediately, Hotch picked up.

She pressed the phone to her ear and heard everyone talking in the background.

"I'm sorry," she said before her husband could even say anything, "did I catch you at the wrong time?"

"No, no," he said, "we've just finished delivering the profile. What's wrong? Is everything okay?"

JJ sighed. "I miss you," she said.

"I miss you, too," Hotch said softly, "and I miss all of you."

"I miss our little girl," JJ blurted out, "I miss her running around the house, I miss her playing with the boys, making a mess...I just miss her. I'm afraid that...she's going to fade away from us."

Hotch looked around at everyone in the Orlando Police Station. The truth was, he missed his daughter just as much as his wife did. But, he could never be found crying. JJ couldn't know that he had given up as well. He was supposed to be the strong one that would be there for her when she needed him on bad nights. If she was busy consoling him, she wouldn't be able to sort herself out.

"She's...not going to fade away," Hotch said, starting to get choked up, "she's going to be right here with us. Listen, Jen, I'll be back tomorrow night...and we'll take her to the doctors. Are you with her now?"

JJ sighed as she looked around. "Well, I'm sitting here at 6:30pm, with Jack and Henry both at sleepovers, and the youngest four are napping...Grace only slept 15 hours today," she said, "not much of an improvement...but...you know."

"Do you want me to talk to Reid? He might-"

"No, don't," JJ said, "just...don't get him involved. He...he has enough to worry about. His mom is...okay, just...don't."

Hotch sighed. "Listen, I need to go," he said, "they need me. I know you can do this, JJ, just...hold on a little longer. Take your medication, take your prenatal vitamins, get Henry and Grace tested, spend time with the other kids...just...do what you normally do. I promise you, as soon as I can come home, I will."

JJ gave a smile as she pressed the phone to her ear. "I love you so much."

"And I love you. I'll see you tomorrow, just call me if you need anything."

"I will," JJ whispered, "bye."

* * *

The sound of her son yelling, "Grace, the pavement's hot!" Immediately grabbed JJ's attention. She knew that Jack was watching out for his sister, but it still worried her.

She ran out to the backyard, where Jack was pouring cold water over Grace's red feet.

"What happened?" JJ huffed.

"She stepped on the pavement and it was too hot," Jack said, "but she didn't say anything...Henry said it was boiling hot so he got flip flops."

JJ sighed. "It's because Henry can feel the heat," she muttered, "look, Grace's feet can't feel anything."

"Momma, it hurts," Grace whimpered.

"Okay," JJ soothed, "do they both hurt, or just one?"

Grace shook both feet. "Both, Momma, help me."

"Does it hurt on the outside or the inside?"

"Inside," Grace said, "they hurt really bad and I keep falling."

JJ froze. "You fell?"

The young girl nodded.

"What does that mean?" Jack inquired.

JJ bit her lip. "It means she's losing her motor skills."

"What's that?" Grace asked, her face dropping, as her hair fell in front of her face.

"It's...," JJ answered, looking up at her daughter, "it's something called neuropathy...it's where your feet and hands start tingling...and...you start falling over a lot, and tripping...but that's okay, because we're gonna get you help, okay?"

Grace didn't really understand what JJ said, but she nodded.

"Am I gonna be okay, momma?" She asked.

Tucking Grace's hair behind her ear, JJ gave her a sad smile. "You will, bubba, you will."

* * *

Shaking wasn't a good sign, and dizziness certainly wasn't a good sign. Little 5 year old Grace didn't know that. She had had type 1 diabetes all her life and detecting low and high blood sugars was nearly impossible. Without a pump alarm going off, she wouldn't know if she was low or high. She couldn't read time very well, she hadn't learnt that yet. She didn't know when her mom would be in to prick her finger.

Rubbing her eyes, Grace tried climbing out of bed. She knew something was wrong with her feet. They had been tingly and numb for weeks. Only recently, the pain had started. It was a stabbing pain that would send her to the floor, crying for minutes on end. She didn't know very much about diabetes at all, but she knew that it was making her feel very poorly. She didn't like it at all.

When her feet finally hit the ground, she felt the same stabbing pain that she had been feeling the past few weeks. It was worse when she was standing up than when she was laying in bed. She just wanted to go back to bed and sleep the pain away, but she was so thirsty and she was sweating a lot. Her parents always told her to get a drink of water when she felt thirsty because it could be dangerous.

Grace reached her door when she felt herself shaking. She walked down the hallway, into the bathroom. She was thankful that she had her own bathroom in the attic, because she didn't want to walk downstairs and fall down, causing her parents to get worried.

She quietly filled her purple plastic cup with water and turned the tap off. She then made her way back into her bedroom. Because her hands were starting to develop nerve damage, she was losing grip of the cup. Water was spilling out from all sides, soaking the carpet. Grace was very upset; she used to be able to walk on a balance beam without falling over and now she was falling over on the carpet.

Before she could reach her bed, she fell down. Her knee, which had feeling in it, hit her bed and at once, she burst out crying. Between the pain, the frustration, and the confusion, she was ready to give up.

Hearing the bang coming from upstairs, JJ was jolted awake. The only person upstairs was Grace. If she listened carefully enough, she could hear the soft cries of her daughter. Knowing her nerve problem, JJ began to worry. She glanced at the clock. It read 3:56am, 4 minutes before she was supposed to test.

"Aaron," JJ went to say, reaching over to the right side of the bed, only to realise he wasn't there. He was at work. JJ should've known better. She shouldn't be letting this stuff get to her.

JJ quickly leapt out of bed and ran up to the attic, where her daughter's cries were now loud and clear. She raced into the young girl's bedroom, where the floor was wet, and she was curled up in a ball by the bed.

"Grace!" JJ said, "what did you do?"

"I falled over!" Grace sobbed, shaking violently.

JJ fell down to her knees as she picked her daughter up. "Why were you up?"

"I wanted water," The girl cried into her mother's chest.

JJ put Grace on her bed and picked up the cup. "You have to test, bubba, and then we can get you back to sleep, okay?" She said.

Grace nodded. "Momma, it hurts," she cried quietly.

"I know," JJ soothed, zipping open her daughter's testing kit, "I know it hurts."

JJ quickly pricked Grace's finger and submitted the blood into the meter. When the number came back, JJ couldn't help but frown.

"You're a little low, so you have to eat some tablets, okay?" JJ asked.

Grace sighed. "I don't like them," she whined.

"I know, but it's only 3, and then we'll get you right back to sleep."

JJ poured 3 glucose tablets out of the container.

"Momma, are they strawberry or banana?" Grace inquired, hitting her numbing leg.

"Banana," JJ smiled, "your favourite."

Grace took the tablets, which quickly pulled her blood sugar up. She had a cup of water, and then JJ carried her to the master bedroom.

"Do you get a lot of sleep?" Grace quickly asked, settling herself in JJ's arms.

JJ smiled lightly as she pulled Grace's small, cold body close to her. "No, but that's okay. Let's try and go to sleep now, okay?"

"I'm sorry, Momma," Grace whispered, "for making you tired."

JJ kissed her daughter's forehead as she closed her eyes. "Bubba, it's a lot more than your illness that's making me tired."

Before JJ could look down, her daughter was already fast asleep.

* * *

**The last part of this chapter sort of hit me a little because of my own personal life experiences, but I hope you all feel for both JJ and Grace. JJ is a working mother who is trying to wrap her head around her daughter's complications. Little 5 year old Grace is confused. Just months earlier, she was winning dance competitions. Now she can barely walk. I want you all to know that diabetes IS NOT just finger pricking and testing. It is the emotions, the pain, the sleepless nights, and the fear of dying everyday. Anyway, I am looking forward to reading your reviews. They mean so much to me. Love you all, x.**


	15. Chapter 15

**Here is chapter 15! Firstly, thank you for all of the positive reviews on the previous chapter! I am so grateful. Secondly, this chapter is going to be showcasing how life still goes on with ill children in the family. Though, there are some struggles for the parents. They are physically and emotionally overwhelmed. You'll learn that in this chapter. I hope you enjoy it! Please review and give me suggestions for things you'd like to see! **

* * *

"Momma, I can do it," Grace said, walking towards the stairs.

An uneasy JJ followed her, watching her feet as they made their way through the hallway. "You sure?"

"I got it," Grace assured.

The truth was, she did have it. She was confident that she could walk. The pain in her feet was still quite strong, though it hadn't stopped her yet.

She grabbed onto the railing and slowly made her way down the stairs.

"Momma," she said, shaking her foot, "it's all tingly."

"Grace, bubba, stop it," JJ warned, "stop walking."

"No," Grace giggled, "momma, it tickles!"

JJ's face fell as she walked alongside her daughter. This wasn't supposed to be a joke. It was supposed to be all better. It frustrated JJ to unknown levels.

"Do you want a smoothie?" She asked, getting some fruit from the bowl on the counter.

Grace jumped up onto the stool. "Yeah, banana please!"

Soon, Tyler woke up. He came running downstairs, like every morning.

"I take it your sunburn is better," JJ laughed, "good morning."

"Morning mommy," the boy said, hopping onto a stool beside Grace, "can I have a pancake?"

JJ grinned as she began cutting up banana slices. "What's the magic word?"

"Pleaaaase?"

"Of course you can," JJ smiled.

She got out a pan and began making the pancakes.

"How is your foot?" Tyler asked his sister.

Grace put her foot on the countertop. "It tickles, wanna feel it?"

"Feet off of the counter," JJ said. Grace quickly removed her foot from the counter.

Tyler touched Grace's foot, trying to feel the tingling sensation that Grace had described.

"Did you touch it yet?" Grace asked.

"I am," he said, gesturing to his hand, "look, Gracie, I'm touching it."

JJ turned around as she put the pan onto the oven top. "Grace, remember, you can't feel it...okay? Tyler, only she can feel the tingles because it's inside her foot, not yours."

Grace frowned. "You didn't touch it!"

"Bubba," JJ said sadly, "you can't feel it. The doctor is going to help you later, alright? She will help you feel better."

Tyler and Grace's relationship was not the typical brother/sister relationship. While Benjamin was very quiet and more cuddly with his sister, Tyler liked to learn with her. When paired up, the two were very outgoing and spontaneous. It was refreshing.

"Do you guys wanna nicely wake Ben and Luke up?" JJ asked, "I'm going to call Jacob's parents to ask if Henry's okay. Just go and wake them up."

"Okay!" Grace and Tyler agreed, jumping off of the bar stools. When Grace hit the floor, a jolt of pain rattled through her foot.

JJ was busy dialling the phone when her daughter reached out to her brother for help. Luckily, she hadn't seen it, or she would have freaked.

"Tyler," Grace whispered, grabbing onto his forearm, "it hurts."

The young boy soon helped his sister slowly up the stairs...all without their mother seeing it.

"You are going to be okay, Gracie," Tyler assured, "you're gonna stop hurting soon."

* * *

"Momma, when are the baby bubbas coming?" Grace asked, looking up from her colouring book.

"Uh," JJ started, as she focused on the road, "in like...12 weeks, do you know how long that is?"

Grace shook her head. "When are they coming?"

"November," JJ said, "so, that's in 3 months. Are you excited?"

"Yeah," Grace said, "but I want a girl baby, like Isabel or Charlotte."

JJ bit her lip. "Gracelyn, I know you want a sister, but we can't change the fact that you're getting brothers. I think you're really gonna like them."

"I hope," Grace muttered.

* * *

"This is clearly peripheral neuropathy," Grace's neurologist said, "the tap test proved that she doesn't feel the rod. However, she is still very, very young, so we can stop the progression and hopefully get her walking normally again."

JJ breathed a sigh of relief. "And what about the foot drop?"

"That can be fixed with a simple brace. We can have one done for her and try it on if you'd like."

Grace shook her head. "I don't want braces!"

"No, Gracie," JJ said, "they're for your feet. It's so you don't trip anymore."

"Oh," the girl said, "can I get braces? I don't wanna fall again."

* * *

Slamming the car door shut, JJ turned to her daughter.

"Are you okay to walk?" She asked, reaching out for the girl's hand.

Grace quickly grabbed it as she put her left foot out. "I won't fall, momma."

"Okay," JJ said, walking up to the pharmacy doors with her 5 year old.

When they got inside of the pharmacy, Grace let go of JJ's hand. She began walking towards the candy aisle, making JJ go after her.

"Stay in my sight at all time, okay? If you think you're gonna fall, you have to tell me so I can come and get you," JJ told her child, "I'm over here, getting yours and Henry's insulin prescription."

Grace nodded as she ran off. Her left foot was hitting the ground hard, and she was scared she was going to trip and fall again. She didn't want her mom knowing because she was already worried enough. Both of her parents were worried. Both of them were drowning in medical expenses that weren't covered by insurance. Both were struggling on their own, they didn't need Grace worrying them. She would look so selfish. Deep down, she was so sorry that she was the cause of her mother's tiredness. She noticed the way her parents acted around her, and if she was being honest, they weren't the same as they were around Christmas. Something had changed.

She studied the tubes of cake frosting that sat on the shelf. At eye level, they looked like heaven. She saw her favourite flavour, and then her least favourite. She saw Henry's favourite, and then his least favourite. She thought it was weird that her mom had to carry around tubes of icing in her purse incase her or Henry had emergency low blood sugar. She didn't really have to do all this.

Picking up the yellow frosting, Grace felt her hand getting numb. She dropped the icing as she heard JJ calling out for her. Grace was speechless. This was so weird. Were her hands poorly, too?

JJ came rushing down the aisle, breathing a sigh of relief that her child wasn't crying on the ground.

"Oh, bubba, I thought you'd fallen," she said, pulling Grace into a hug, "what is it?"

"I dropped the icing," Grace said, "I'm sorry."

JJ picked the icing up and put it back on the shelf. "That's okay, let's go."

"But I want icing!" Grace exclaimed.

The woman shook her head as she grabbed her daughter's hand. "You can't get it, Gracie, we already have loads of icing at home."

Grace frowned as she caught her mother's hand.

Maybe it was her fault that everything was happening like this.

* * *

"Is that for one month or three months?"

Hotch looked up from his work. "Huh?"

"The prescription," JJ repeated, "one or three?"

"Oh," Hotch said, reading it, "three."

JJ nodded as she took it from him. "Did something happen at work? You seem a bit...off."

Hotch bit his lip as he punched numbers into a calculator. "No."

"Aaron," JJ rolled her eyes.

"Fine," he said, looking up at his wife, "you know that whole...Mr. Scratch thing? It's just been bugging me lately, and I've lost sleep over it and-"

JJ studied his face. "He really got into your head, didn't he?"

"Yeah," Hotch said quietly, "and I don't wanna...talk about this. Not here."

"Okay," JJ said, "if that's-"

"Jen, it's nothing," Hotch said, "what was the cost of the glucose tablets?"

JJ sighed. She rummaged through the ongoing pile of prescriptions and bills until she found the one she was looking for.

"This month...$60..but then we got more last week for Henry...so $68...but you can add it to next month." She said.

"I need his test strips and vials," Hotch said, punching numbers into the calculator in front of him.

JJ flipped through the bills, mentally begging herself to not freak out when she read the costs. "Test strips...$201...for that pack of 200, and vials..2 humalogs were $80."

"And what were Henry's infusion sets and reservoirs?" Hotch asked.

JJ scanned through the prescriptions and bills again. "The usual...$151 for sets, and $35 for reservoirs," she said.

Hotch sighed. "I'm just glad they last 3 months at a time, or we'd be broke."

JJ huffed as she threw down Grace's stack of bills. "We are going to be broke, Aaron," she said, "look, Henry's bills alone costs us $535. And now we have to figure out how much Grace's bills are. We are going to drown in this...mess, and our children won't have the things they need to live!"

"JJ," Hotch soothed, "it's getting late, I think it would be best if we-"

"I'm not going to bed. Not until we do these bills and get them out of the way," she said.

Hotch gave in. "Alright, can you read me all of Grace's costs?"

Going through the list, JJ could feel her heart breaking. All of this to keep her children alive.

"So, $30 of that $68 was for Grace's tablets, and then her test strips were another $201, she needed 3 vials for daily injections, so that's...$120, and then she's got her syringes at $25," JJ read out, "and thank God her pen is reusable," she said.

Hotch looked up once he had punched the numbers into the calculator. "That's $376."

JJ's eyebrows furrowed as she picked up the set of bills in front of her. "We forgot her glucogon kit...$100. So, that's $476."

"Unbelievable," Hotch said, "that this is the expense of keeping these two alive."

"It makes me wonder where this all could've gone," JJ shook her head, "thousands of dollars a year, just so our children can wake up every morning."

Hotch but his lip. "We have great income, and once you start working again, we'll be able to afford it...maybe even have more money left over. It's never perfect, Jayje, but we'll make it work, I promise."

JJ got up and walked over to where her husband was sitting. She sat on his lap and threw her arms around him. Without saying a word, she closed her eyes and inhaled the scent of his body wash. She wished she could hold onto him forever.

* * *

"Ew, I don't wanna go back to school next week!" Jack moaned, throwing off his shirt, "we'll get no time to swim or have parties, this sucks!"

"But you'll get an education," JJ offered, slicing watermelon, "and you'll be a lot less bored."

Jack groaned, running his hand through his hair. "I'm going outside to swim," he said.

JJ shook her head. "Not without supervision, you're not," she said, "plus the triplets wanted to go in after lunch, so you'll have to wait."

Jack rolled his eyes. "They're watching Mickey Mouse!"

"They're 5 years old, what's your point?"

"Why can't I swim?" Jack retorted.

JJ laughed. "Because you'll come in all soaking wet and you'll get the furniture wet. That's why."

"You're so unfair!" He moaned.

"Your lunch is ready," JJ said, "you'll be out there in 10 minutes, guaranteed."

* * *

"Are you gonna go in?" JJ laughed, watching as her daughter sat on the side of the pool, kicking water around.

"It's cold," she complained.

Tyler jumped in and came back up. "It's not cold! Get in, it's fine!"

"The temperature is 87 degrees, Gracie," Henry said, "it's okay."

"No, Henry, it's too cold! It's like ice cubes!" Grace whined.

JJ felt her stomach sink when she realised what Grace was talking about.

"Bubba," JJ whispered, picking Grace up off of the ground, "part of your foot problem is that it's extremely sensitive to hot and cold, so you think the water is a bit cold."

"Can you make it warm?" Grace asked.

JJ shook her head. "No, but I can help you in if you want. The boys want to play with you."

Grace nestled her head into the crook of JJ's neck. "I wanna go a'sleep now, momma, I'm tired."

"Can you tell me why you're tired?" JJ asked, bringing Grace inside.

"I don't know," Grace said, "I'm just tired."

It wasn't a good answer, but it was the best the 5 year old could give. Her eyes were drooping closed, and her breathing was starting to slow down.

"Oh, Gracie," JJ whispered, stroking her daughter's hair as she laid her on the couch, "what happened to you?"

JJ just wanted her daughter back.

* * *

**I really hope you enjoyed that chapter! If there's anything you want to see in upcoming chapters, let me know! Keep in mind that the story is mainly about Grace's struggle with diabetes as a young child. Ideas must adhere to that. I am so excited to start writing chapter 16 because I am going to be touching on the more sensitive side to diabetes. I hope this story has taught you about diabetes, and that you continue to look into it. As always, the cure starts with awareness. I love you all and your reviews! Xo**


	16. Chapter 16

**If you think about it, JJ's pregnancy has lasted through this whole story so far. This is the most realistic depiction of pregnancy I have ever written, so I am personally giving a round of applause to myself. Woo! Anyway, each chapter is about 2 weeks. She's in week 32, and as you know, with prior earlier births means an earlier birth this time. That means she's about to have the twins! I am so happy with what this chapter turned out like. Please enjoy it and review!**

* * *

Aaron Hotchner adjusted his arm around his wife as they sat in the waiting room of the doctor's office.

Playing with her fingers, JJ said, "do you think Grace is okay?"

Hotch pursed his lips as he looked up at the ceiling. "I hope so, she...she has everything she needs, she has Ben and Tyler with her, and she knows what to do if she feels poorly."

"What if she falls asleep, babe? What if...I don't know, she has a really low blood sugar and passes out? Or what if she falls over during playtime?" JJ questioned, running her fingers along her belly.

It was the kids' first day back at school. Jack was in 6th grade, Henry was in 3rd, the triplets were in 1st, and Luke was in preschool. The house was empty for the first time in 3 years. Soon it would change, but for now, JJ and Hotch had to enjoy their time alone while they could.

"The school is great with Henry and Grace, and they will know exactly what to do if Grace is in trouble. First graders...they...I don't know, play soccer, throw balls, draw with chalk...she will be fine. Her feet aren't damaged far enough for her to be paralysed," Hotch said, "and if she falls asleep, the school will know to test her and call us."

JJ swallowed just as the door opened.

"Mr and Mrs Hotchner?"

Hotch and JJ got up and followed the OB into the room.

"You're just about in your third trimester," she smiled, "how have you been feeling?"

JJ looked at Hotch before looking back to the OB. "F-fine...just...there are a lot of different things going on-"

"Like what?" Kayla, the OB asked softly.

"Well, you know that Grace and Henry are diabetics...and we've just been overwhelmed with expenses lately, and Grace's nerves are damaged...but, I have noticed my anxious feelings have lowered, and I've not felt as panicky lately." JJ explained.

Kayla smiled. "The antidepressants must be working," she said, "so, if you'd just sit back, and we'll get a scan going, we can see the babies."

The OB put gel over JJ's stomach and waved the wand around it. The picture that showed up on the screen was beautiful.

"Those are our little boys," JJ beamed, "wow, do you guys see this? Those are our baby boys!"

Hotch grinned as he squeezed JJ's hand. "We definitely have some soccer players in there," he said.

"Building up that team pretty quickly," JJ laughed, "soon, we'll all be out there, playing soccer."

"Everything looks healthy, no problems are happening. Your due date is still November 19, but be prepared to deliver sometime within the week before, as twins come earlier, as you know," Kayla informed, "I'll be back, I'm just getting the pictures."

JJ looked at Hotch and just beamed. Her entire face lit up like a thousand stars. She was so happy. Her mood had suddenly jumped up, and, for once, it wasn't something to be concerned about.

"You're smiling," Hotch pointed out, admiring the dimples on her face as she beamed.

"I guess...when you're unhappy for so long, the smallest thing can make you feel like a normal person again," JJ said, poking at her stomach.

Hotch poked at JJ's belly, too. "They seem to like it," he said, watching the sonogram as the twins moved as they reacted to the pokes.

"But I don't!" JJ laughed, "they're kicking my gut!"

* * *

"Your smile is my favourite," JJ told Luke as she dressed him.

The 3 year old giggled as he touched his mother's face. "No, yours is, momma!"

JJ laughed as she pulled her son's shirt over his head. "Ok, let's get breakfast! Your brothers and sister are downstairs," she said, catching his hand.

"We get to draw today, momma," Luke marvelled as he got to the bottom of the stairs, "and paint, and do reading, and play!"

"Oh yeah?" JJ asked, "are you gonna draw me something?"

Luke nodded, "I always draw you something."

"Mommy, Jack took my hairbrush!"

JJ gave Luke his breakfast and rushed into the living room, where Grace and Jack were wrestling each other.

"Is this over a hairbrush?" She asked, grabbing the object from Jack's grasp.

Grace rolled her eyes and she pushed Jack back down onto the couch. "He started it."

"I don't care who started it," JJ half shouted, "just get ready, okay?"

Leaning against the couch, Grace began to brush her hair. Jack gave her a dirty look, to which the girl gave one back. JJ pinched her temple. Today was going to be a long day.

* * *

"Are we in way over our heads?"

Hotch laughed as his fingers trailed along his wife's belly. "No...why?"

"8 kids?" JJ asked.

"So?"

"So?" JJ said, "you think a couple with 8 kids isn't crazy?"

Hotch nodded, "I guess...I mean, every couple is crazy."

JJ interrupted him by getting up. "Look, I miss you," she blurted out, "okay? I miss you being here. I miss the time we spend alone, I miss our food fights, our Christmas baking, our karaoke nights, our-"

"I miss you," Hotch said, kissing JJ's lips tightly, "I miss every part of you."

"I miss us...Aaron," JJ said, "we haven't had a proper night since...I don't even know...and now I'm pregnant so that's gone down the drain," she groaned, letting a tear fall.

Hotch's eyebrows furrowed as he pulled her in. "The tears are...pure hormones JJ," he said, tipping her chin up, "and just because you're pregnant does not mean I can love you any less."

JJ stared at him. "No, Aaron, I m-mean," she stammered, "my depression is getting worse. I can't think, I can't concentrate, for God's sake, I can't breathe some nights!"

"Has this been happening while I've been at work?" Hotch asked, stroking JJ's hair behind her ear.

JJ gave a soft nod before she broke down into tears. "I am so tired," she said, "my body is giving up, and I have c...cried...myself to sleep every goddamn night b...bec...because of this-"

"I could've helped you," Hotch said sternly, "I could have helped you."

"No...no...crying," JJ said shakily, "that's..that's a sign of...strength..yeah, that's strength, isn't it? You can't just...just s-stop a person fr...from crying, can you? That's...that's not right."

Hotch pulled JJ in close. "I'm going to softly rock you back and fourth," he whispered, "and you're going to take deep breaths. You're going to close your eyes and just fall asleep in my arms, okay?"

He shouldn't be scared. He should be a supportive husband who is willing to do anything he can to help his wife. She was struggling with depression and her panic attacks were beginning to come back.

JJ's breathing sped up and her tears soaked his shirt.

"Oh...my God," JJ gasped, "what's...happening...to...me?"

As calmly as he could, Hotch said, "you're having a panic attack. It's gonna be alright. Just breathe in, and breathe out. It's just a bad day."

"It's ju-just...a bad...d-d...day," JJ stammered, trying to catch her breath.

"It will be okay tomorrow," he told her, feeling as though JJ's weight had been pushed onto him. She was leaning on him for support, both physically and mentally. "Tomorrow is going to be so much better."

* * *

"I have picked up 13 test strips today," JJ laughed, throwing them onto the counter, "you know, the doctors told me we'd find endless amounts of these around the house, and I didn't believe them...but oh my...you guys."

Grace giggled. "Can I put them away?"

JJ nodded, scraping them up from the counter and giving them to her daughter, "yeah, but you might wanna get Jack to help you, the box is quite big."

"Mommy," Tyler started, "me and Ben wanna go on the trampoline, but nobody's outside except for Henry."

"Daddy and I are going out there in like 5 minutes, okay," JJ answered, "we have to do the barbecue and then you can go on the trampoline."

Ben gasped. "So we are all gonna be outside?"

"Yes," JJ laughed, "we will all be outside."

* * *

"Oh my," JJ laughed, rubbing her belly, "these two do not go to sleep at all."

Hotch smiled as he put his hand over her's. "Do they ever stop?"

"They stop right about...never!" JJ exclaimed, "at least we'll have a good soccer team in a few years, that's for sure."

Hotch chuckled, "we will."

"Mommy, look," Tyler said, "we found another Stanley!" He opened his hand and a little spider crawled out.

"Tyler, please take the spider away from me," JJ said, "play with it over there. Not here, please? Go find Grace."

Tyler sighed. "She's sleeping," he muttered, "like always."

Hotch looked at JJ and then back at his son. "She's got her own things going on, Ty-Bug, you can't be mad at someone for their own personal needs."

"I'm so lonely without her though," he said, "she's the only one who likes Stanley."

"And what about Ben, or Jack, or Henry?" JJ offered.

Tyler sighed again. "Ben wants to stay on the trampoline, and Jack and Henry are playing in the forest."

"I didn't think you could be lonely in a family like ours," Hotch laughed, "okay, how about, you keep your spider in a box and wait until Grace wakes up?"

"Okay," Tyler said, "because we want to make Stanley do tricks."

JJ's eyes widened as she gulped. "Tricks?"

* * *

"Mommy," Benjamin begun as he settled himself beside JJ, "what will happen if the babies have diabetes?"

JJ swallowed thickly. She had been trying to put off thinking about the twins because it would only add to the stress of her pregnancy. As much as she couldn't wait to hold them in her arms, she was so very frightened of the complications that could arise. Though type 1 diabetes wasn't genetic, JJ was sure it had come from her side, as her grandmother had it. Again, she was very worrisome and let every possible factor worry her.

"Mommy?" Ben asked again, causing JJ to snap out of her thoughts.

"Uhm," JJ said, "if they have diabetes, they'll do needles like Grace and Henry, and they'll have special medical emergency bracelets, and they might even have to sleep less than other babies. But you don't worry about that, okay, Benny?"

JJ kissed her son on his head as she pulled him in closely. "You're getting so big," she said, "where did the time go?"

"I'm only 5, mommy," Ben said, "that's not very old."

"Oh, my boy, soon you'll be driving, and then you'll be moving out and having your own kids."

The mother pushed her hair off of her face and cuddled with her son.

"Why do you always worry so much? Daddy says it's because you want all of us to be healthy," Benjamin said, burying his head in the crook of JJ's neck.

JJ pursed her lips. "I want you all to be happy and healthy. That's all I want. I worry because I need you to be safe. Do you remember when I stayed at the hospital with Grace 2 years ago, when she was sick?"

Ben nodded.

"I was so worried, I couldn't come home and leave her. Mommies need to be with their children, especially when they're sick. You, Grace, and Tyler were only 3! Grace was in the hospital for nearly 2 months, that's a long time."

"Oh," Ben started, "so is that why she sleeps all the time? Is it 'cause she's sick?"

JJ shook her head. "No, Benny, she's not sick anymore. She's just...tired. Her body started doing all of this hard work only a few weeks after you guys were born. She is so tired, do you get that? And she can't feel anything in her feet, and she's confused, and scared, and-"

"Mommy, this is what daddy told me about," Ben warned, "you worry about things too much."

Hotch was right. Ben was also right. JJ was in way over her head.

"Okay," JJ said, "that's all I'm trying to say. She's very confused, and she doesn't understand how she can feel things with her hands, but not her feet."

"Like how she always falls?" Ben asked.

JJ nodded. "Yeah, she sometimes falls over because her nerves don't work very well. That's her diabetes, that's why she's tired."

"And when it gets so blurry and she always has to rub her eyes," Ben continued, "and she always drops her water at night, so I always have to help her get it."

Jennifer swallowed. She didn't know this. "Wait, what about her eyes?"

"She always says it's blurry, so she has to put her glasses on, and then she looks like you when you put your glasses on."

JJ felt so ashamed. Could her daughter not understand what was happening? Or was she simply too afraid to tell her own mother her problems?

"Are Grace and Henry really sick?" Ben inquired.

"Henry, thankfully, is okay. His diabetes hasn't caused any problems yet. He's very healthy, his eyesight is good, his legs are good, you know? But Grace...she's not doing as well. That's why daddy and I are always near her, 'cause she might fall over, or she might not be able to see, and she's younger than Henry, so she doesn't know how to manage her diabetes as well as he does."

Ben touched JJ's belly. "Will you still love the babies if they have diabetes?"

"Of course I will. Daddy and I will always love you, even if you're sick. We're gonna take such good care of all of you," JJ said quietly against her son's head, "and one day, there will be a cure for diabetes, and you'll all live to see it."

* * *

**NOTE: I am not forgetting the other kids! The story is simply about Grace and how she gets back on the road to dancing again. I liked this conversation between Ben and JJ, because as you know, Ben is very close to Grace and wants her to be as healthy as possible. Plus, he's 5, and 5 year olds have A LOT to ask and wonder about this world.**

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Leave a lovely review or a scene request. I would be more than happy to write it in! Xx**


	17. Chapter 17

**I am back uploading another chapter of The Sugarless Plum! Sorry for the 3-day-late upload, I had a lot going on and I lost inspiration. **

**Incase you wanted to know, JJ should have the twins around chapter 20. Each of my chapters is around 2-3 weeks. Do the math, and around chapter 19-20, it's 40 weeks. **

**Enjoy this chapter and review!**

* * *

"Breathe in, breathe out," JJ said, "it's just a bad day."

She sighed very deeply as she maintained her leaning position against the counter.

"Mommy?"

Jumping a little, JJ spun around. "Yeah, buddy?"

Eight year old Henry slowly walked into the bedroom and made his way into the bathroom. He saw pills in front of his mother, and immediately thought of two things: 1) she was taking her daily antidepressants, or 2) she was very sad and needed to take even more antidepressants.

"Daddy needs you," the boy said.

JJ took a deep breath and looked down at her arms. Glad she hadn't harmed herself, she looked up into the mirror. Her eyes were so heavy, and she had dark circles under them. It wasn't just the pregnancy.

"Mommy? Daddy-"

"Okay, Henry, I'll be down in a minute!" JJ snapped, hitting the counter.

It certainly scared the young child, but not to the point of crying. He rarely saw his mother lose it when he was around.

Calming herself down, JJ swallowed.

"Did you get daddy to check your blood sugar?" She asked more calmly, turning around.

Henry nodded, playing with his finger. "Yeah, I have to have a few tablets to pull my level up, and then I can go swimming."

JJ grabbed his hand as they walked down the hallway together. "And did you finish your homework?"

"Yeah, but there's one question that I don't get and I need you and daddy to help me later," Henry answered, holding his mother's hand tightly.

"You better get on that then," JJ smiled, reaching the bottom of the stairs.

"Jen, can you help?"

When JJ walked into the storage closet, she threw her hand over her mouth.

"What the hell happened in here?" She asked.

"Language," Hotch said in a sigh, "we have little ones over there. One of the boxes was too heavy and it caused a couple to fall."

JJ swallowed as she scanned the room.

"Where's Grace and Tyler?" She asked.

"Grace's sleeping, and Tyler decided to sleep with her. They're in the living room," Hotch answered, going through each insulin vial to see if they were broken.

JJ ran her right hand through her hair. "Okay, Henry, Jack, we need you guys to help us clean this up. Show Ben how to sort the vials."

Hotch grabbed Luke, just as the child threw a box of test strips, scattering them on the ground.

"Oh, Luke," JJ groaned, bending down to pick them up, "don't throw things."

"He's 3," Jack said, "he throws things."

Hotch swallowed as he felt the tension rising. "Can you not talk back to your mother like that?"

"It's okay, Aaron," JJ sighed, very clearly ready to fall asleep, "he's right. Who am I to get mad at a 3 year old for throwing things?"

"Uh, his mother," Hotch answered, "is there something we need to talk about later?"

JJ gave him a fake smile as she sat down. "No, not at all."

* * *

"Henry, I need you to go around the house and get everyone's school uniforms," Hotch said, "and Jack, I need you to get everyone's other clothes."

As he turned around, his eyes met his wife's.

"Jen," he smiled.

"Hm?" JJ looked up, "oh, hey, d-did you find Grace's glasses?"

Hotch laughed, "yeah actually," he said, "they were in her dance bag."

"Is she going to be okay?" JJ blurted out, "I...I mean, will Grace ever step foot in that dance studio again?"

"I...believe so," Hotch answered, "look, we need to give it time. You need to sort yourself out, and together, we will sort Grace out."

JJ's jaw squared itself as her eyes became like fire. "I'm not a problem," she stated, "_she's_ not a problem."

"But you have problems," Hotch clarified, "you can't solve one problem without solving the other."

"Everyone has problems," JJ shot back, "including you."

Hotch's eyes darted around the room. "Would you keep it down? Can we talk about this somewhere else?"

"Oh," JJ retorted, sure her eyes had rolled well far back into her head, "somewhere...away from 6 young, active children that are dependant on their parents? Okay, sure."

"What the hell is going on with you?" Hotch half-yelled. "Why are you like this?"

"Why-why am I like this?" JJ yelled, "I'll tell you why! Because I am so sick of depression! I am so damn tired of being vulnerable and weak-"

Aaron's eyes widened. "Jen...you're...you're not weak."

"Stop lying!" She shouted, "just stop for one minute," she huffed, "stop treating me like some mentally ill person who doesn't know right from wrong!"

"You are mentally ill!" Hotch yelled, slamming one of the children's plastic plates onto the counter. "You have depression, which is a metal illness," he continued, "and you also have anxiety, which is a mental illness! You are mentally ill!"

JJ swallowed thickly as she looked her husband dead in the eye.

"Mommy? Daddy?"

Their heads had never snapped around so fast.

"Benny," JJ said calmly, still heavily breathing, "I need you to go and play. Let daddy and I talk for a minute."

"But you're yelling," he whined, grabbing his mother's hand, "you're not talking."

The look JJ gave the 5 year old was enough to make him run off and forget the conversation. When the child was out of sight, JJ turned back to her husband and watched as he exhaled deeply.

"We're yelling," he marvelled, "we're not talking. Jennifer, listen to him. If he can hear us, so can the other kids. It's best we talk about this later."

Crossing her arms over her growing stomach, JJ sighed. "You know what," she said, shaking her head, "let's just forget it and move on. It was obvious I needed to yell, and now I've done it. I'm all better."

"Jennifer-"

"Look," she said sarcastically, "no panic attack! I haven't had my pills in...what, a week? I'm getting better! Maybe," she continued, "if I just hold on a little longer, I won't be such a problem, will I?"

Hotch swallowed thickly. "You need to sort yourself out if you want to do anything for our unborn children," he said, "and then we can sort our daughter out."

"OUR DAUGHTER AND I ARE NOT PROBLEMS!" JJ shouted, walking out of the room.

"I can help you, if you'd let me," Hotch calmly offered, mentally cursing himself for not having tried harder.

"Don't you get it?" JJ yelled, "I don't need help! I can do this all by myself!"

* * *

"I take it you're still mad?"

"Huh?" Jack turned around.

Hotch gave a sympathetic smile to his son. "I know you want all of us to be there at your game tomorrow, so do I," he said.

"But mom's pregnant and...and Grace has an appointment, and Tyler and Ben have music," Jack said disappointedly.

"Hey," Hotch said, "Grace wants to go, and so does Henry, and mom loves soccer-"

"I wish we'd all do things as a family without interruptions," Jack mumbled, "like, when Grace isn't sleeping, or when Henry doesn't have an appointment, or even when mom isn't feeling sick...I just want to do something."

Hotch's eyebrow perked up as he smiled. "Like what?"

"Like...go out for dinner, or go to an amusement park," the nearly 11-year-old marvelled on about, "or maybe even a Redskins game."

"Because it's mom's favourite team, right?" Hotch asked his son, "what happened to the Cowboys?"

Jack groaned, "mom's always right. Besides, Spencer did the math, and they're supposed to win big this season."

"You're relying on math to give the Redskins a win?" Hotch scoffed.

"Yes, I am," the boy smirked.

Hotch smiled. "Okay, how about tomorrow after your game, we go out for dinner?"

"Yeah!"

* * *

"Jen, please, would you just listen to me?" Hotch asked quietly.

JJ began to roll her eyes. "I know you're sorry, and I am too."

"You have to stop avoiding this, I am right here. I have always been here."

"But why are you here? Why don't you let me deal with it by myself?" JJ asked calmly.

Hotch swallowed and licked his lips. "Because we are...two ordinary people that are extraordinary together. Right now, you're a bit broken, and I'm trying to fix you, but you won't let that happen. You need to let your walls down, and just let me in. Your problems are my problems...okay?"

JJ nodded. "And...and I know that, but I also need time for myself. I can't depend on you."

"Who says you're depending on me? We're supposed to be helping each other, building each other up."

JJ bit her lip. "I just...I really don't like being depressed."

"I know," Hotch soothed, "I know you hate it. I know you hate...feeling weak, and sick, and sad...but I am right here. I love you, and all I want is for you to get better."

JJ sighed and looked at her husband in his eyes. "I know...and I know all you want to do is help me because you love me...but...sometimes, even my own body doesn't recognise that."

"It'll be okay, if...if that's what you want me so say," Hotch said.

JJ pursed her lips. "I hope."

* * *

"You can't go to school," JJ informed her daughter.

"Why not?" The 5 year old whined.

Calmly, JJ said, "because you can't walk anymore. Bubba, your legs don't work anymore, do you get that?"

"That's not fair!"

"I know it's not," JJ said, "I know, and I'm going to make sure you get to learn, okay? You'll get a tutor."

Hotch came in and helped Luke get his shoes on.

"Grace, look at it this way, you get to stay home and sleep when you need to," he said.

Gracelyn frowned. "But it hurts too much to sleep, daddy, it hurts."

"That's why we're going to take you to physiotherapy and get you leg braces. They're gonna help you walk, and...and hopefully...you might be able to walk again."

JJ leaned over and grabbed her daughter's hands. She then helped her up and held her back to support her. She was not going to let her daughter fade away.

Not like this.

* * *

"Hey, Grace," the nurse said, "I haven't seen you in so long! How are you?"

Grace giggled. "Good."

"Your mommy told me that you can't really walk very well," Grace's nurse, Avery, said, "but we're gonna fix that today by putting those braces on your legs. And then, we're gonna teach you how to walk again."

"When can I walk?" Grace asked, sadly looking at her legs, "And when can I dance?"

Avery pursed her lips. "You know what, Grace, I don't know," she said, "but today, you're going to take the first step in recovering."

"Are those my braces?" Grace asked, eyeing the objects in her nurse's hands.

"Yep! And we're going to put them on soon, okay? And you should already be walking better after today."

* * *

"Momma, I'm gonna go to New York and dance when I'm older," Grace informed from the back seat.

JJ smiled to herself as she kept her eyes on the road. "You are, Bubba, you're gonna do so much. You're gonna be incredible."

"Well, if I can dance," Grace started, "I hope I have no more diabetes and no more tingly feet when I'm older."

"Hey, Plum, this is just a bump in the road, okay?" JJ said, "we are going to get through this. You're my little sugarless plum, and whether diabetes is cured or not, you will always be my sugarless plum."

* * *

**There it is! Thank you for reading! **

**Part of me feels like I overdid it a little by making Grace nearly paralyzed, but I assure you, it's for the right reasons. The story will all work out. I have some very exciting plans for Grace, which are actually foreshadowed in this chapter. I hope you enjoyed it!**

**A review would mean so much!**


	18. Chapter 18

**Hello! I am back uploading chapter 18 of The Sugarless Plum! I had quite a bit of fun playing with new ideas and starting to string different parts of the story in. There is a lot of foreshadowing here, be warned. See if you can spot it! **

**I hope you enjoy this chapter! **

* * *

"These are called braxton hicks contractions," JJ told her son as she winced, "it doesn't mean I'm having the babies."

"They look pretty real to me," Henry said.

JJ shook her head. "Nope, these are just to get me ready for when I have the babies. They're nothing to worry about."

"Grace would probably freak out if she saw you like this," Henry said, "'cause I think uncle Spence told her stuff about babies...and..."

"Yeah," JJ winced, "I get it."

Henry wrinkled his nose as he scratched his head. "So how do you stop them?"

Getting up, JJ said, "you walk it off. You get up and walk around and they'll stop."

* * *

"Mommy!" Grace shouted from the couch in the living room.

JJ made her way in. "What?" She asked.

Pushing the bowl of peaches away from her Grace looked up. "Momma, my teeth are wobbling!"

JJ laughed as she sat down beside her child. "I think miss Grace has her first loose tooth."

"Loose tooth?" Grace asked, her eyes going wide.

JJ nodded. "Yeah, Plum, your baby teeth are going to wiggle and fall out, and when they fall out, you'll have new teeth grow in."

"I want to keep this tooth!" The child whined.

"You can," JJ said, "you can get it back after the tooth fairy comes."

"A tooth fairy?" Grace inquired, "what is a tooth fairy?"

JJ smiled, finally able to tell her daughter all about the wonders of childhood. She had always dreamed of this moment. She moved the girl's legs gently and made room for herself.

"The tooth fairy is a special fairy that comes when you lose a tooth. When you lose a baby tooth, you put it under your pillow. When you wake up, you'll find money."

Grace's eyes widened. "So we get money for losing our teeth?"

JJ nodded, "pretty much. But hey, you should save it up and buy something cool with it."

"Like a cure for diabetes, or better legs?" She laughed.

Glad her child wasn't crying over her illness, JJ smiled. "Yeah, maybe," she said, "but what about saving up for dance?"

"Yeah!" Grace said, "Dancing in New York!"

"Exactly. You're gonna get there one day."

* * *

The morning had gone by slowly, even after having completed all of their errands. While the kids were at school, JJ and Hotch went to their OB appointment, got groceries, and even had extra time to shop for the twins. With Grace being homeschooled until she completed physiotherapy, they could easily schedule her tutor to come at any time. Since Grace was sleeping the entire morning, JJ and Hotch figured it would be easier for her tutor to come in the afternoon.

"I am 37 weeks pregnant," JJ laughed, hitting her husband, "Running stopped ages ago. You can go in there."

"Fine," Hotch said, kissing her forehead, "I will."

He got out of the car and went into the pharmacy to pick up glucose tablets for Grace and Henry.

JJ looked back at Grace, who was sleeping in her car seat. She could've watched her sleep peacefully for ages, except she woke up.

"Morning, miss sunshine," JJ smiled, "did you have a good sleep?"

Grace nodded, rubbing her eyes. "Where are we?"

"We're just getting your tablets, and then we're going home. I'm gonna have to test you soon."

"Is that why you waked me up in the morning?" Grace asked.

JJ nodded. "Yeah, and your sugar levels were low, so you had fruit and yoghurt to bring them up."

"Are we going home soon?"

"Yeah, we are...and we're gonna get you dressed and get you to your doctors office, and after that, we'll have lunch." JJ answered.

Hotch got in the car and handed JJ the bag with the children's tablets.

"They ran out of grape...so I ended up getting blueberry," Hotch said, turning the car on, "speaking of which, do you still need that smoothie, or are you done craving it?" He laughed.

JJ hit him on the shoulder. "I still want it," she said, "and cupcakes, and maybe even a couple pancakes? These guys are hungry."

* * *

"You're gonna put one foot in front of the other," JJ told her daughter, "and you're gonna walk, just like you used to."

Grace's nurse, Avery smiled at her. "Does it work better with the bars or our hands?" She asked.

"The bars," Grace answered, watching as her leg began to twitch. "Daddy, I need you to hold me."

Hotch came up behind Grace and held her small frame steady as she took a few steps.

"Come on, beautiful, you're doing so well," he praised, looking up at JJ, "you're making us so proud."

"Daddy, I fell," Grace frowned, grabbing the bar.

Hotch pushed Grace's hair from her face and looked into her eyes. They were just like her mother's.

"I know...I know you fell," he said, "but, hey, you got back up. That's all that matters, okay?"

Grace nodded, pushing her glasses back up to her face. "Okay."

"Do you want to try again?" Avery asked.

"Uh huh," Grace said, straightening out her primrose smock.

Once again, Hotch held Grace as she walked.

"I'm doing it, daddy!" Grace shrieked as she took 3 steps without falling, "look, mommy, can you see it?"

Wiping the few tears that had managed to escape her eyes, JJ nodded. "I seen everything, baby girl, I seen everything!"

* * *

"And what if you go into labor tonight? Or tomorrow?"

"And what?" JJ laughed, "We'll go to the hospital. I don't get why you're so worked up about this."

Hotch poured a smoothie for JJ. "I'm just saying, we need to get your bag ready, figure out where the kids are gonna go, do the final touches on the nursery, you know?"

JJ nodded. "I get it, I get it," she said, "I'm thinking we get Spence and Pen here looking after the kids, except Spence wants to be there," she frowned, "and so does Jade."

"Grace also wants to be there, remember?" Hotch reminded, "So I think we'll get you to the hospital, get you all hooked up and stuff...and then take whoever wants to come."

"Yeah," JJ agreed, "I can't imagine the other boys being interested in me giving birth, can you?"

"Well, maybe not that," Hotch laughed, "but...yeah, I think Jack wants to be there, partially because he, uh, misses us being together as a family."

Taking a sip of her smoothie, JJ said, "really? He never came to me about it, he usually tells me everything."

"I know he trusts you, Jen, I know he does, but...I think he's still trying to get used to the idea of being the oldest out of all these kids. For so long, he was the only one, and then he had Henry with him, and then we had the triplets, and everything happened so fast."

"You're right," JJ shrugged, "are we going too fast?"

Hotch's eyebrows furrowed. "That we had 6 kids in 5 years?"

"God, that sounds so bad!" JJ laughed.

"To be fair, it was a set of triplets, a set of twins, and Luke," Hotch said.

JJ laughed as she reached for the fruit. "That's much better," she said.

Hotch picked up a blueberry from the fruit bowl and threw it at JJ.

"You did not!" She laughed, throwing it back at him.

"You have more than enough blueberries in that smoothie there," Hotch laughed, "do you want more?"

JJ's eyebrows perked up as she finished her smoothie. "Please," she begged, trying to stop laughing, "please!"

Hotch went over to JJ and cupped her cheeks, before placing numerous kisses to her lips.

"Yeah, I don't think I want that smoothie anymore," JJ said, putting her arms around her husband's neck as he continued to kiss her.

"Good," Hotch laughed, bringing her over to the couch, "'cause this is much better."

"God, you bet," JJ groaned, pulling her husband's shirt off.

Hotch was right. This was much better than a smoothie.

* * *

"I'm gonna need you to lift your dress up," JJ said, preparing her daughter's insulin shot.

Grace lifted up her yellow sundress and squeezed the fat on her thighs so that JJ could administer her insulin shot.

"Can I help daddy close the pool later?" The small girl wondered, wincing as she felt the insulin working its way into her system.

"If you want," JJ said, "but you know I can't come out with you, so Jack might have to help you walk, okay?"

Grace nodded, dropping the bottom of her dress. "When can you help again?"

"After I have the babies," JJ said, "so, in a couple weeks. Does that sound good?"

"Can I be there when you have the babies?" Grace asked, following her mother to the kitchen.

JJ pursed her lips as she twirled Grace's ponytail.

"Bubba, I don't know," JJ answered, "little kids aren't really supposed to be in the delivery room. Mommies are in a lot of pain when they have babies, and it might upset you."

"I've seen you cry before, momma," Grace said, "it made me upset but that's okay because you said pain doesn't last forever."

JJ went to the fridge and began unpacking food to prepare breakfast. "This is a different kind of pain, Plum, I just don't think you should be in the room, okay?"

"Is Jack gonna be there?" Grace inquired.

"If he wants to be, because he's old enough, and understands what's happening."

Grace crossed her arms. "No fair! I wanna be there!"

"We can let you in after I've had the babies," JJ offered, "like Ben, Tyler, Henry, and Luke. That way, you can see them when they're all clean and fed."

"Are babies dirty?" Grace asked, partly shocked.

JJ laughed as she began to put bread into the toaster. "Yes, bubba, babies are dirty. They have blood and fluid on them that protects them. So what I'm saying is, we get them cleaned up and I will feed them, and then you can all come in and meet them."

"You have to feed them? But they have no teeth," Grace continued, "how do babies eat if they don't have any teeth?"

"Oh, Gracie," JJ laughed, "mommies make milk when they're pregnant, so when their babies are born, we can feed them."

Grace scrunched her nose as she smiled. "So is that why your boobies get bigger?" She giggled.

"Yes," JJ answered, quite astounded as to how her daughter knew this much, "now, excuse me while I make your breakfast...since you have teeth."

Grace giggled as she got JJ's joke. "That would be gross!"

* * *

"Mommy, my tooth falled out!"

Hotch and JJ were sitting on the couch, talking about their plans when they heard one of their children yell.

"Tyler?" JJ questioned.

"Ben?" Hotch added.

When Ben came downstairs, JJ's eyebrows furrowed. "I thought it would've been Grace, she's got a loose tooth too."

"Mommy, there's blood," Ben whined, holding the tiny white square in his hand.

"Alright, let's get your mouth cleaned up then," JJ said, taking the tooth and setting it on the counter.

Ben examined the tooth as JJ poured him a cup of water.

"How many teeth is that now?"

"Three," Benjamin said, holding up 3 fingers proudly.

JJ's eyebrows raised as she handed the cup to her son.

"How many has Tyler lost? Do you know?" She asked.

Ben thought for a moment before slushing the water around his mouth. He spit it out into the sink and wiped his mouth. "Four," he said.

"And Grace has her first loose tooth," JJ said, "and Jack lost his last tooth last week. My babies are growing up!"

"Mommy, don't cry again," Ben groaned.

Fanning her face, JJ laughed. "It's okay, Benny, mommy's hormonal right now."

"Horm-"

"Go and play, alright? Make sure you put your tooth under your pillow!" JJ exclaimed, leaning against the sink.

Hotch got up from the couch and followed JJ into the kitchen.

"Got out of that one easily," he laughed, wrapping his arms around her.

"Mmm, I was just about to go and wake Grace up for her shot," JJ said, nestling her head in the crook of his neck.

Hotch continued cuddling her. "I'll do it, you go and sit down," he said, "I can tell your back's been hurting a lot lately."

JJ smiled sincerely as she let go of his hand and walked away.

* * *

**AW. OTP AF. I hope you all enjoyed this chapter! Woohoo for the triplets growing up! This is so exciting! I first wrote them as little 3 year olds and now they're nearly 6! We will most definitely explore more of their childhood years and experiences throughout the following chapters.**

**Please review! I read each and every one of them and I am so appreciative for all of them. You guys all mean so much to me! Thank you for reading so far! **


	19. Chapter 19

**HELLO EVERYONE! I am back *cue gif of someone going, "thank the lord she's back!"* ANYWAY...here is another chapter of The Sugarless Plum! The ending will satisfy you...I hope. Enjoy it!**

**To the anon who reviewed about insulin being injected into the feet and fingers, you clearly misunderstood what I wrote. I am not that dumb, and very obviously know that insulin is injected into the belly, thighs, arms, butt, etc. However, you prick your fingers to test. You clearly misunderstood. And, in babies, they are also pricked in the feet for testing. No need for the blunt review. **

**_Also, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE don't forget to review! I miss your kind words of encouragement and praise!_**

* * *

Wincing as she bent down to pick up a test strip, JJ huffed.

"You okay?" She heard, as a large, yet gentle hand rested on her lower back.

JJ scrunched her nose as she nodded. "Back pain," she said, "comes with the...territory."

"You sure?" Hotch asked.

"Yeah, why would you be worried?" JJ laughed, putting the test strip on the counter.

Hotch grabbed JJ's wrist lightly and spun her around. "You're due in 2 weeks, Jen," he said, "and these two weeks are crucial...you could go into labor tonight, or tomorrow," he panicked, "or right now-"

"Okay, why don't you calm down," JJ said, "I've done this tons of times before, this time is nothing to worry about."

* * *

"You're not eating all this Halloween candy now," JJ said, taking the stash of candy the kids had in front of them.

"But we're hungry," Tyler whined.

JJ nodded as she took out fruit. "Yeah, and here are bananas and grapes and apples. Eat them."

"Grace, Henry," Hotch said, "you should've known better. You know not to eat before you test."

Grace whined as she wrapped her fluffy purple blanket around her. "Momma, can I have a banana milkshake please?" She asked.

"Yes," JJ said, "does anyone else want one?"

Tyler and Ben made their way back to the couch and climbed over the back.

"You don't get all the couch," Ben groaned, kicking Grace's feet.

"Don't poke me," Grace shot back, moving her feet away.

Ben kicked her again, which caught JJ's attention.

"Benjamin!" She called, rushing over to the couch.

"She's taking up too much room," the child reasoned.

JJ rolled her eyes. "Just because she can't feel it doesn't mean it's okay."

"She thinks I poked her," he said, "cause she didn't feel it."

"That doesn't make it okay. Now, sit over there, on that side of the couch. Tyler goes in the middle of you both."

JJ went back over to her daughter and straightened her braces. She then pulled the blanket back over her legs and tucked it in.

"Your smoothies will be ready in a couple minutes."

* * *

"This tooth does not want to budge, does it, Gracie?" JJ asked the girl sitting on her lap. She brushed the child's hair out of her face and looked back at the webcam.

"This her first one?" Emily inquired.

JJ nodded as she moved Grace as she felt more back pain. It wasn't as bad as it was in the morning, but it was close.

"You okay?" Prentiss asked.

"Fine," JJ nodded, "back aches come with pregnancy, I should know."

JJ took Grace off of her lap and stabilised her so that she could walk. She then told her to go and play while she and her friend caught up.

"So, when are you due again?" Emily asked, raising an eyebrow, "I mean, Jayje, I know you're pregnant with twins, but...you look a little-"

"I am not fat!" JJ whined.

Emily laughed. "I was going to say big, but I guess...fat...works too?"

"You take that back!" JJ said.

"Okay, fine," Emily laughed, "when are you due?"

JJ scoffed. "Wow, what, like...3 weeks?"

"Jayje."

"Next week," she huffed, "and I can't wait to get these two out of here! I can't wait to work out again, get my body back, go clubbing again-"

Emily turned her head as she smiled. "With 8 kids?"

"Are you out to make me feel bad?" JJ groaned. "Spence and Jade are more than happy to babysit, and I know Dave wouldn't mind, and I have Meg and Kate, and Grace's little friend's older sister is 19, and I know she would be happy to."

"I'm glad you have a large support system," Emily smiled, "I really am, I mean, it must be hard."

JJ laughed as she pushed her hair back off of her face. "It is. But it would be nice if I could...eat Cheetos and play scrabble, and do fun things here, with you."

Prentiss frowned. "I miss you, too, but hey, I have two weeks off next month, so maybe I can come up and see you all. I can help out with the twins-"

"You'd do that?"

"Of course I would, Jayje," she smiled, "isn't that what family is for?"

JJ chuckled. "I can't wait to get my normal life back."

"So, have you guys got names picked yet?"

"We're sort of running out of options, I mean, 7 boys? How many boy names are there left?" JJ laughed, "but I think we settled on Alexander and Nicholas, or maybe Alexander and Sebastian, or maybe George and Sebastian?"

Emily raised her eyebrows. "I take it you haven't chosen."

"We did!" JJ exclaimed, pulling out her name book from the shelf above her, "we did! We're just figuring out which combo we like best."

"Well, if it makes any difference, I think I like Alexander and Nicholas."

JJ grinned, circling them in her name book. "Me too."

* * *

"Baby blankets, sweatpants," Hotch listed, "...Cheetos?"

JJ laughed as she reached over and grabbed the list from him. "Give me that."

"You know, those Cheetos are taking up a lot of space, I think you should pack something more...useable."

Hotch could swear a tear leaked from JJ's eye.

"Are you the one having the babies?" She cried.

Hotch's eye's widened. "Alright, alright."

* * *

Throwing the phone onto the couch, JJ broke out into a smile.

"Hey!" She exclaimed, walking into the kitchen.

"Someone's giddy," Hotch laughed, closing the cupboard, "what is it?"

JJ ran her right hand through her waist length hair. "Kate invited us over."

"All of us?"

JJ turned her head a little to the left. "Yeah, why...why wouldn't she?"

"There's a lot of us," he said, "that's a lot of work."

"Well, we make it work."

Hotch thought for a moment as he stared at JJ's persuasive face.

"Alright, when?"

"Whenever Sierra wakes up," JJ informed, putting her hand on her back.

Hotch raised his eyebrow. "As long as you don't go into labor when we're there. I can only imagine the worst case scenario."

* * *

"She is beautiful," JJ remarked, holding Kate's new daughter.

"Isn't she?" Kate said, "though she's a little small for one month, but, you know."

JJ smiled at Sierra as she gently patted her back. "Grace, Tyler, and Ben were born at 27 weeks, each weighing, what, 2 pounds?"

Kate's eyes widened. "No," she said, surprised, "that's insane!"

JJ nodded. "Aaron's wedding ring could fit around Grace's ankle."

"What was that like?" Kate asked. "Must've been the scariest thing."

"Healthcare is great," Hotch said, "except it's triplets, so they're going to be smaller than most babies, and they're going to want to be near each other. They were there for...13 weeks, I believe."

JJ sighed. "And 7 months in, when they were about 17 pounds each, Grace began to lose weight. She was about 12 and a half pounds by the time she was diagnosed-"

"I can't even picture that," Kate interrupted quietly.

"And I had to nurse her longer, and every time she had a low blood sugar, I had to nurse her. And she would cry and cry and cry when she had to get a shot because her body was so small, and by a year old, she had red thighs, and little red dots all over her belly. Giving insulin is much more stressful than getting a level," JJ said, "I cried the first few times I had to do it."

"Jayje, if you don't mind me asking," Kate started, "how long did you nurse the triplets for?"

JJ tilted her head as she thought. "I would have to say...10 months for the boys, and they recommended I nurse Grace for...I don't know, maybe a year? A year and a half?"

"You excited for your two?"

Hotch shrugged. "Two more boys," he said, laughing, "sure we can handle them?"

"It's only two more mouths to feed, isn't it?" Kate laughed.

"Oh," JJ smiled, "just two more. It can't hurt."

* * *

"So," Kate started, "how did you settle on Grace?"

"Aaron actually came up with it," JJ said, "he used to play guitar...like, non stop. He would learn new songs and I'd always ask what one he was learning this time. He told me he was learning a song called 'Grace', and I guess we just liked it."

Kate smiled. "Sierra's middle name is Catherine, after my sister. It's fun choosing names, you know?"

JJ nodded, leaning back in her chair. "It is. I love getting to make that decision."

"What about Isabel and Charlotte?"

"Huh?"

Kate cleared her throat. "Unless you don't want to..."

JJ took a deep breath. "Isabel Clara and Charlotte Lucy," she said, "nearly 3 and 6 years old."

"You don't have to, JJ," Kate said.

"I want to," JJ said, "I have, what, 7 pairs of shoes...all bought for Charlotte. At the time, I was the only one who knew about her...and so I went crazy. I...I got her a little dress, little shoes...I couldn't wait to...to tell my mom...and then..."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be."

The room was silent. Kate felt horrible for JJ, anyone would. The truth was, she couldn't imagine losing a child, let alone two. JJ lived in constant fear of losing another child. It seemed so easy. They didn't even have to be born yet. That was hell.

* * *

"One foot, then the other."

Grace held onto her daddy's hand as she did as her physiotherapist said.

"It's all tingly," she said, shaking her foot.

"It's your nerves, Gracie," JJ said, "keep going."

The young girl held onto the bar as she moved forward a few steps.

"You're doing so well!" JJ exclaimed.

When Grace got to the end of the bar, she fell into Avery, her physiotherapist's arms.

"Aren't you all big and strong?" Avery said, "your walking is getting better."

"When can I dance again?" Grace asked, looking back and forth between her mother and her physiotherapist.

Avery shrugged. "We have to get you walking first, then we have to get you running, and then we can start to work back to your dancing skills. You'll get there."

"When can I go back to school?" Grace followed up, wiping the sweat off of her forehead.

"When you can walk, you can go back to school, and that's going to be up to mommy and daddy to decide when that happens. If we keep making progress like this, you might be able to walk properly by Christmas. Then you can go back to school in January with everyone. Does that sound good?"

Grace nodded, leaning against JJ's knees for support.

"Then that's today's session. Keep working those bars, Grace!" Avery said, giving the child a high-five.

* * *

"Jen?"

Wincing as another pain hit her, JJ turned around.

"I've been calling you," Hotch said, "is everything okay?"

JJ nodded. "Everything's...everything's fine. Just...ooh, more...sh-"

Hotch's eyes widened slightly. "You're not in-"

"No, I'm not in labor!" JJ shrieked, leaning against the counter. "My back is in horrible pain, my ankles are swollen, you are _never_ touching my boobs again, and these braxton hicks contractions are only getting worse!"

"They're not supposed to get worse unless they're...you know, real," Hotch said, beginning to massage JJ's back.

"They're not real!" JJ half-panted. "Don't be stupid!"

Knowing not to get offended or angry, the man shook it off. "Jayje, I think you should sit down."

"We are never having sex again," JJ mumbled, "I always end up with the short end! We have fun and what do I end up with? Nine months of...of this? What do you get?"

Hotch's eyes darted around the room.

"Another two sons?"

JJ sighed as she shook her head. "I need to relax, and then all the pain will go away."

"Right," Hotch said, "let's get you in the bath. I'll pick the kids up from school, take them to their things, and give you all the time you need, okay?"

"Okay," JJ said, pressing her hand to her back.

* * *

Since Grace couldn't go to dance, and Luke wasn't in any extracurricular activities, Hotch had to keep a close eye on them while he tended to JJ. The kids were downstairs playing while he made JJ relaxed.

"Daddy, can we have dinner now?" Grace asked, looking up at him.

"In a while, Gracie, you've just had a snack. Are you coming with me to pick the boys up?"

The girl nodded as she got back to drawing. "I always come."

"Yes you do, and Luke, are you coming?"

"Yep!" He said, climbing onto the couch.

"Daddy, how do you spell Jennifer?"

Hotch went over to Grace and sat beside her. "Are you making a card for her?" He asked.

Grace shook her head.

"Don't look! You'll spoil it!" She said.

"Alright then," he said, "J...e...n..n...i...f...e...r," he listed, watching as his daughter wrote it down.

In frustration, Grace dropped her pencil. "You have to help me, daddy, I can't do it!"

Hotch got down beside Grace and picked up the pencil. He put it in Grace's left hand and guided it in the shape of a 'J'. He wasn't letting his daughter's neuropathy stop her.

* * *

JJ slowly made her way into the bedroom and fell onto the bed.

"How is it?" Hotch asked, closing the door.

Wiping the sweat off of her forehead, JJ said, "hurts...a lot."

"Changing positions helped last week, have you tried walking around?"

JJ nodded, walking slowly over to her husband. "You know what? I'm 4 days away from my due date...maybe it's happening."

"You think?"

JJ held the bottom of her swollen belly as she rested her head on Hotch's chest. "Yeah...yeah I do," she said quietly, trying to calm down, "the contractions follow a pattern...every 13 minutes, which means—"

She winced loudly as a strong contraction hit.

"What do you need me to do?" Hotch asked, pushing his wife's hair off of her face.

"I need you to take me around the house," JJ said, "just walk me around...the house...it'll help."

"Do you need your ball?"

JJ swallowed, holding her husband's hand as she steadily walked to the door.

"No, no, not yet," she said.

JJ stopped once in the hallway as another contraction hit. This time, it lasted 20 seconds. Having gone through them multiple times before, JJ breathed it out and continued steadily until she reached the top of the stairs.

"You need to hydrate and take deep breaths," Hotch encouraged, supporting JJ's lower back as she walked.

"These are probably just braxton hicks," JJ said as she stifled a laugh.

Hotch and JJ made their way down the stairs slowly and steadily, and then walked into the kitchen.

JJ flicked on the light and headed straight to the fridge.

"Let me get that," Hotch said, grabbing a water bottle from the top shelf, where JJ couldn't reach. He unscrewed the cap and handed it to her.

"Thank you," she panted, chugging almost three quarters of it down. She then pressed her head to her husband's chest as the pain came back once again.

Hotch rubbed her back and kissed her on the forehead. "You're doing so well," he whispered.

* * *

**YOU GUYS I AM SO EXCITED TO WRITE CHAPTER 20! I hope you loved this chapter as much as I did! Can I get a "hell yea" for those Emily and Kate interactions? Woo! **

**PLEASE REVIEW! I am so happy! **


	20. Chapter 20

**I AM BACK! Sorry for not posting in a while. I've had writers block, which couldn't have come at a worse time. Anyway, here is the big chapter 20. Enjoy.**

* * *

Rubbing his eyes, Jack looked at the clock on his bedside table. He realised it was 10:30am, nearly 3 hours later than he usually woke up. He shot out of bed and opened the curtains.

"Henry!" He called, opening the younger boy's bedroom door. When he found him asleep, he was a bit puzzled. Had everyone slept in?

He shook Henry and turned him over.

The 8 year old rubbed his eyes. "Do I have to test?"

"No," Jack said, opening Henry's curtains, "it's 10:30, we're late for school."

Henry jumped out of bed and threw on his t-shirt.

"Is anyone else up?" The younger boy asked.

"I don't know," Jack said, "but I'm going to see if mom and dad are up."

He crept down the hallway until he reached his parents' bedroom. He put his head up to the door and listened in. He could hear his dad talking, maybe on the phone. It wasn't easy to tell.

He knocked and stood there.

When his dad opened it, he had a phone to his ear.

"Yes," he said, "okay, thank you."

Hotch threw the phone onto the bed and walked over to the door.

"You never got us up for school!" Jack expressed, quite angry. He never missed school.

"That's because you're not going," JJ said, holding the bottom of her belly, "you're going to the hospital with us later."

Jack's eyes widened. "You're having the babies?"

"That's what it looks like," Hotch said nervously.

"Uh...d-do...do you need anything?" The boy asked.

JJ groaned. "An epidural."

"Alright," Hotch half laughed, "I need you to get the other kids up, uncle Spencer is coming over right now. He'll be here in a few minutes."

"Can't you just have the babies at home?" Jack asked, "I've seen it before, like on TV, and in the movies. They have babies at their house, and my friend Austin was born at home."

JJ breathed through a contraction. "That's...because...this is–" she held onto the dresser for support, "this is...twins. It's a lot more...a lot more dangerous."

"Oh," Jack said, "so when are you going to the hospital?"

"Whenever Reid gets here," Hotch said, "which is why you need to get everyone up while I help your mother."

* * *

"Uncle Spence!"

Reid turned around when he heard his god-daughter's voice.

"Gracie, can you hang on a second? I'm just gonna help your mom and dad, okay?" He said.

"Are they going to the hospital?" Grace asked, dropping onto the top step of the staircase.

Reid helped JJ out the door. "Yes, your mommy is having-"

"The babies! Mommy's having the babies! I have to get ready!"

"You can't go," Hotch said, "you can't be in there when she has them. You're gonna come later."

Grace sighed. "Okay," she muttered, figuring out how to properly pull herself up without wearing her ankle-foot orthotics.

* * *

"I wish they'd give me the damn epidural already," JJ groaned.

"You're not far enough along yet for that," Hotch said, "and besides, you could end up having an emergency c-section."

JJ rolled her eyes and looked at her husband. "No," she said firmly, "I am not going for another c-section. After the triplets, I was done. I have such an ugly scar under my belly now!" She whined.

"It's barely noticeable," Hotch assured.

"It better– okay, yeah, grab the nurse," JJ said, feeling an intense contraction hit.

* * *

Spencer Reid was quite shocked when he walked in on Grace playing one of Jack's Beethoven pieces on the piano.

"I didn't know you could play Beethoven," he said, standing behind her.

"I can only play this song," Grace said, going through her folder, "but I can play Mozart better."

Reid sat down beside his god-daughter and watched as she played.

"You know, this is probably one of the last times you'll get a good practice in without worrying about disturbing any babies."

Grace nodded. "I know, but daddy said he's gonna take us to real music lessons soon."

"Oh, well that's good," he said, "are you going to go with Ben and Tyler?"

"Uh huh," Grace said, "and I also have to go to violin lessons."

"You," Reid said, pinching Grace's nose, "are one very talented girl."

* * *

Later in the afternoon, Jack and Henry's friends called by. The kids were out playing around the neighbourhood. That left the younger 4 children at home. Luke was having his nap, Tyler was watching a movie, and Ben and Grace were drawing in the office.

Reid wasn't quite sure where to go. Each child was very independent and knew how to handle themselves. He figured he'd earn brownie points in he did something fun with them.

"Hey," he said, walking into the kitchen, "if any 5 year olds in particular want to make cookies, come to the kitchen!"

It hadn't even been 10 seconds and all 3 children were jumping up to the counter.

"Chocolate chip!" Ben exclaimed.

"No! Banana!" Grace exclaimed.

"But I want chocolate!" Tyler nearly shouted.

Reid was quite stunned. He'd never had this many people talking to him before.

"Okay, well, why don't we bake all 3 of them?" He suggested. JJ and Hotch had to deal with them somehow.

"Yay!" They exclaimed.

And it just so happened they had mix for chocolate chip, banana, and chocolate cookies.

* * *

"You're 6cm dilated, Jennifer," the nurse smiled, watching as an annoyed JJ threw her head back onto the headrest.

"And my water hasn't broken yet," she muttered as she rolled her eyes.

The nurse laughed. "If it doesn't break in the next couple hours, we'll have to break it for you...but when we break it, labor usually comes on very rapidly."

"Oh God," JJ groaned, "please do!"

The nurse left, leaving Hotch and JJ behind.

"How do you feel?" Aaron asked, placing his hand over hers.

"I want to go home," she whined. "Not deal with–"

Her knuckles went white as she held the bed railings.

"How bad are they?"

JJ glared at him. "Bad."

"What are we going to do while we wait for them to come?" Hotch asked.

"We could always get them to break my water."

At this point, JJ was on her side, half crying. She wasn't sure if her husband would agree with her choice to have her water broken. Luckily, he did.

* * *

"Can we go swimming?" Grace asked, peering out of the back window.

Reid picked her up and carried her over to the kitchen counter. "Not until the summertime, Grace," he said. "It's November. The pool is cold!"

Grace whined. "But I wanna go swimming!"

"It's cold," he said firmly. "It's also time to test, I have a feeling you're a bit low."

"Just 'cause I wanna go in the pool doesn't mean I have a low sugar!" She complained.

Reid laughed a little as he got Grace's lancing device out of the drawer. "This is exactly what your mommy and daddy told me about. Usually you're very good, but when you have low sugar, you get cranky and–"

"Uncle Spence! Look! It's 'nother tooth!" Ben exclaimed, running into the kitchen.

"That's like his hundredth tooth!" Grace said.

Reid pricked his god-daughter's finger and submitted the blood into the meter. He turned to her brother and took the tooth from him.

"Mommy tells me you put the tooth under your pillow and wait for the tooth fairy, right?" Reid said, pouring water for the 5 year old.

"And we get money!" Ben exclaimed.

Grace put her left pointer in her mouth and wobbled her own loose tooth. "I'm getting money soon," she said.

"Wow, you guys are going to be rich!" Reid exclaimed, giving Ben his water. "You have to rinse your mouth out."

Grace picked up her glucose meter and read it. "Is that nine?" She asked.

"Ninety," Reid corrected. "That's a bit low for you, so we need to get you a snack."

"Mommy always gives me icing," Grace said.

Reid laughed. "That's for when you're really, really low," he said. "How about skittles? You only need about 15 carbs."

Grace moved along the counter. "But they have to be yellow."

* * *

By the time it reached 8pm, JJ had just about delivered the twins. It was an exhausting 14 hours, but for JJ, it was worth it.

"Hello," she said exhaustedly, as one of her sons was placed on her chest. "Hi, I am so happy to meet you!"

It wasn't long before she delivered her next son. He was placed onto her chest, too.

"Hello, baby boy," JJ cried, cuddling him.

After a minute, the boys were taken away to be weighed and banded.

Hotch stroked JJ's sweaty hair back and looked into her watery eyes. "I am so, so proud of you, Jen," he whispered.

"And I did it without an epidural!" JJ half-laughed.

She was a mess. Her emotions were everywhere. She had just delivered two of the most beautiful boys in the world and she was proud of herself. Not only that, but she had been feeling better than usual lately, and she wanted that to last.

When the twins were cleaned up, they were taken back to JJ and Hotch to hold and admire.

* * *

Carrying both a sleeping Grace and a sleeping Tyler to the car, Reid yawned. He was tired, himself. It was nearing midnight, and JJ had woken up from her sleep. She was ready to see the other kids and let them meet their new brothers.

If he had to admit it, Spencer felt weird in a car with 6 children. It wasn't as hectic as it usually was, though, as half of them were sleeping. He realised how hard both JJ and Hotch's jobs were when he nearly forgot to test both Grace and Henry before leaving. When both of their blood sugars were low, he had to give them glucose tablets to pull their levels up.

"Does it hurt having babies?" Ben asked.

Spencer swallowed. Was this what having 5 year olds was like?

"Yeah, it does," he said. "I mean, a lot. Sometimes. It depends. Some women get epidurals."

"Isn't an epidural big and grey?" Ben asked.

Jack laughed. "That's an elephant!"

"Do epidurals hurt?" Henry asked.

Spencer wasn't sure how to answer that. "Do you want to ask your mom?"

"No, 'cause you know everything."

* * *

Reid brought the kids to JJ and Hotch and went to the waiting room to wait for Garcia to arrive.

The kids walked into JJ's room to see her holding one of the babies. Hotch was holding the other.

"Mommy had the babies!" Grace exclaimed, rubbing her eyes. "They're so tiny!"

"I did," JJ smiled, looking down at her baby. "They're not as tiny as you were."

Hotch passed one of the babies to Jack. The boy was so excited to hold his brother.

"Whoa, he's smaller than I imagined," the 12-year old remarked. "What's his name?"

"That's what we wanted to tell you," JJ said.

Hotch got the younger boys up from playing on the floor and put them on the end of the bed.

"That's Alexander," he said, pointing to the blue bundle in his wife's arms. "And this is Nicholas."

"You used the name I said!" Jack exclaimed, "I said the name Nicholas!"

JJ laughed. "That's right. We liked that name, too."

"So it's me, Jack, Tyler, Ben, Grace, Luke, Nicholas, and Alexander," Henry said.

"Yes, and we agreed you can call them Nick and Alex when they're older...like, nicknames."

"This baby is so soft!" Grace exclaimed, touching Alex's skin.

Hotch looked at JJ and grinned. It was that stupid grin that she loved so much. That's when they knew they had done good.

* * *

After Reid and Garcia had been in to see the twins, JJ wanted just Grace to come in and spend time with her.

Hotch brought her in, holding her up as she walked with her braces on. Her motor skills had gotten significantly better.

"Hi, momma," the 5 year old whispered. "Are the babies asleep?"

JJ nodded, looking down at the children laying in front of her. "Just a little, don't talk loudly," she said softly.

"What one is Nich'las?" She asked.

"The smaller one," JJ pointed out. "He's shorter than Alex. Do you see that?"

Grace nodded. "Yeah, like me?"

"Yeah," JJ said, "you're still very small."

It was quiet for a moment before JJ spoke up again.

"Listen, Gracie, are you still mad about the babies?"

Grace thought for a moment. "No," she said. "'Cause I was scared about them but now I'm not scared."

"Okay, that's good."

"Can I feed the babies? And do diaper changes? And give them baths?" Grace asked.

"Yep, when we get home, you can help me," JJ said, much to Grace's liking.

Grace crawled across the bed, right up beside her mom. "Momma, you don't have black eyelashes."

JJ laughed. "I don't have makeup on, baby," she said. "Having babies is a lot of hard work. There is no time for makeup!"

"Well, I think you look very pretty when you don't have any makeup on, mommy," Grace admitted, pressing a kiss to her mother's lips.

"I love you so much, Grace," JJ mumbled, pulling her daughter in.

"I love you too, mommy."

* * *

**YAYYY SHE HAD THE BABIES I AM DANCING SOOOO GOOD! I hope you liked this story! There are many more stories to come! Xo**


End file.
